Struggling to stick with the gym and unsure how hard to train

[Wannagetfit]

I’m 36 male and dabbled with going to the gym since I was 16 but I can never seem to commit for longer than a few months, I’m 6ft and just under 15 stone and fairly broad shouldered, I coach football for my sons team and play golf and love sport but just feel so unfit and keen to change my appearance. Is the reason I never stick to going to the gym just because I don’t know what I’m doing? I’ve had PT’s who have built programmes for me and I’ll start enjoying it then might ache for a few days after so don’t get then just completely loose my rhythm.
In my head I think just start easy and make it a long journey but when I speak with people they say go as heavy as you can otherwise you won’t see any progress.

Are there any group sessions at your gym led by an instructor? I do a few of them, they are more motivating and the trainer soon gets aware of everyone’s capabilities and pushes them accordingly

looking to join a gym and considering PureGym and looks like they do classes. I used to be a member at Virgin as it’s my closest gym and a 5min walk but ended up cancelling it as it was over £100 a month and barely went.

Give it a go, is there a trial? I’ve made loads of friends with group gym sessions too.

They are currently offering a 3 day free trial so might do that. Just had a look and it looks like they do quite a few classes.
I think it’s just that embarrassment feeling of starting again and feeling so unfit but guess that’ll change quite quickly if I keep it up regularly.

I find classes better than ‘the Gym’ as such. I’ve gone from doing 2 Aqua Fit classes a week (and the odd gym session where I really only liked the treadmill as I did not know or feel confident on the weights etc), to Box Fit, Boxercise, LB and Tums and Stretch and Tone. The chaps that come to our Box Fit classes say very similar to you.

Far better to start easy and stick to it than lose motivation and stop. A bit of soreness is normal and it does get better if you train consistently. I'd suggest working with a PT, explaining your history and getting them to build a plan to get you over that hump.

Classes build consistency. Consistency is what you need. Then build slowly. Don't listen to others, it's your body and your individual goals. I started off with classes and added in weights when I felt stronger/fitter after a couple of years. Lifelong fitness is a marathon not a sprint so it doesn't matter how fast you go, just that you are moving forward.

I can recommend Pilates, we have men in our group classes. Same in Yoga.

Also, you need to get to know your body. Feeling sore after exercise is not the same as being in pain because you've injured yourself. Make sure you have rest days. If you're getting DOMS, you're probably pushing yourself too much.

But by going”as heavy as you can” you are not enjoying what you are doing, getting sore and giving up. So I’d say that’s fairly rubbish advice 😆. I think classes and sessions with a pt are a good idea. Classes are motivational because you want to be seen to turn up and not be flaky, you meet people and motivate each other and often, you end up having a laugh when something goes wrong 😆. I wouldn’t get hung up on seeing progress by lifting heavy if that isn’t for you at the moment. You need to get in to the habit of exercising first. I agree that classes other than weight lifting are a good idea too. I find I exercise consistently because I have found forms of it that I really enjoy. So it might be worth trying a few different types. You certainly won’t see any progress if you stop after a few sessions 🤷‍♀️😊

Trainers often give programs that are too hard

I don’t mind aching the following day, but you said it aches for a few days afterwards and then you don’t go and fall out of the habit of going

Is that the reason why you fall out of the habit, because it’s annoying having DOMS for a few days? I love the gym but they would like me to work hard harder. I tried that and then I thought I don’t wanna do a weightlifting competition. So I reduced the weight. And in some cases, the reps.

Forget the Virgin/Pure/David Lloyd type gyms. Look around and see if you have a small local gym that does small group PT sessions. Mine charges £80/month for 3 sessions a week. Sessions are at set times. If you miss one, there’s no alternative. Commit to the class, commit to the consistency. I find that going early gives me no excuse not to go unless I am actually away. My class is 6.15am Mon/Wed/Fri! Been going for 3 years. I still hate the 5.45 am alarm, but I have deal with myself that I don’t even think about it, I just get up and go.

My ‘gym’ is the same. Classes only, you can’t just go whenever. And it’s outside which I love! Really great community.