Should I reduce how much exercise I do? By how much? (possible TW)

[123456789xyz]

I had a pretty healthy exercise regime until a couple of months ago.

I was doing 40min exercise videos in the mornings 4 or 5 days a week (4 X dumbbell workouts and one body weight cardio or pilates). Maybe an hour or two each of cycling or walking (more some weeks) and about 5 hours of water-sports per week (now only 1.5 hours as I've been made to promise to stop going out alone).

A couple of months ago my mental health suddenly fell apart a bit and due to anxiety and some OCD stuff and my exercise levels have ramped up (up to 8 hours a day at one point).

I can't keep still or stop doing the exercise videos in every spare half hour I have. I'm doing intense cardio workout several times a day, dancing manically if I have a spare few minutes, using TV time to do extra crunches or glute bridges, and squats and calf raises while the kettle is boiling or brushing my teeth. Sometimes I get up in the night to do extra ones too.

I am in therapy but no one will tell me how much is ENOUGH and how much to reduce it by. The amount I was doing before feels unfeasible and I want to be moving ALL the time, and feel intense guilt and anxiety if I'm still for more than a few minutes.

I know the therapy is the key but I would love some advice as well. How do I reduce it and how much by?

I think the reason that no one will tell you how much is enough is that it won't actually be helpful.

I think the important thing if you can is to allow yourself to sit with your feelings of anxiety and guilt when you aren't moving.

See if you can tell yourself
"Oh, I'm feeling anxiety and guilt about not moving but it's ok I'm not doing anything wrong. The anxiety and guilt are likely displaced from something else that has happened in my life in the past. Even though I am feeling like this, I am safe and not doing anything wrong. Everything is actually ok"
Try and sit like that for a few minutes and gradually try and increase the time you can manage. Maybe focus on doing this rather than "how much exercise is enough ".

If you aren't already I would try some psychotherapy to support you and maybe make sense of anything else in your life that may have started the anxiety and guilt feelings originally.

This is pretty much what my therapist said too. I know you're right. It's just that my brain screams abuse at me every time I sit down, even if I'm working.

I have OCD. I've also just had an autism assessment referral put through by the mental crisis team but I'm worried about taking a spot on the waiting list from someone who really needs it. I'm not sure how much difference an ASD diagnosis would make at this point in my life.
My sister is an autism specialist in the NHS and she seems certain that I have ASD.

I have definitely lost weight. I have enough years of this to have the self-awareness to know that, although I never weigh myself so I have no idea how much. A lot, based on my family's faces last time I saw them.
I have mixed feelings about Tabitha Farrar. I want to agree with her but her approach doesn't work for me. I've also spoken to her personally and found her pretty impatient and dismissive in person.

Be kind to yourself, you've just lost your Mum. Have you had any grief counselling, that might help.

How do you feel about sitting still while watching a TV show? Can you manage that? If that's a struggle start with a short show, something that you enjoy obviously (not sure what would work best, a comedy or a quiz show maybe but you can experiment) and build up to watching something film length.

Knitting is a good idea, along those lines what about learning to play a musical instrument or colouring in (get one of those mindful colouring books with complicated pictures) or reading a book or cooking/baking. You want something that keeps you busy mentally rather than physically.

Hmm. Has your pyschologist or counselor recommended any techniques for managing the screaming voices when you’re still? Could some visualization techniques help? Make yourself a hot chocolate or something similar that you can drink and feel safe about that contains some decent calories and macro and micronutrients - maybe a smoothie? Then sit down to drink it and then lie down somewhere that isn’t where you sleep - maybe on a yoga mat - and imagine that food and water traveling as nutrients and energy traveling through your body and repairing and nourishing your bones, muscles, organs and skin. Picture it making your muscles stronger again, making your skin glow again, your hair grow strong again.
Is it medically safe for you to try some things where gentle movement brings a sensation of wellbeing or sensoriel pleasure? Like yoga as mentioned above, but could you visit a hot pools/thermal baths place and have a soak or take a short and leisurely stroll along a beach or river path while chatting to a friend? Things where there is a little bit of movement you might find soothing, plus another distraction. So kind of retraining your brain to move gently while thinking about other things and not play obsessive thoughts on repeat.

Thank you for this. The therapist I'm seeing is mainly for grief and trauma therapy. She doesn't have much eating disorder experience and seems wary of discussing it much. But it's the biggest thing at the moment, which is getting in the way of starting the processing of everything else that I need to work through. I've only had two sessions so far though, and I like her a lot, more than any other therapy I've had.

I've been trying to watch TV but I find it hard to concentrate on it and sitting is really uncomfortable - not just because of the screaming voices telling me to get up and move but also physically. It's easier to sit for a short time if I'm working on something mentally though, so that's a really good option. I might try to play some piano today or work on something similar. Thank you.

We've only had two sessions so far so we haven't got there yet, but I will ask her next week. I don't really know what's medically safe for me, everyone I'm working with (therapist and mental health crisis home treatment team) is inexperienced with eating disorders.

I did ask the therapist how much exercise she thought I should reduce it to, but she said "None" which feels unrealistic at the moment. I'm also worried that if I stop exercising, given how little I'm eating, my weight will plunge too much and my muscle will waste. I'm supposed to be going somewhere wonderful with my father and sisters for Christmas in 12 days and there is already suggestion that I might not be able to fly or safely go - so I'm pretty keen to avoid looking any worse than I do.

I took @TheOliveFinch 's suggestion and did two yoga videos yesterday evening instead of cardio. It helped a lot and I slept better as well (and didn't have to get up and exercise in the small hours). So I think gentler movement is the way to go. I've now also got a lot of pain in my hips, shoulders, knees and feet (and a horrible stone bruise on the ball of one foot) so anything high impact is sort of masochistic anyway.

Today I've done my usual 40 minute dumbbells but I chose a video with no jumping, and I'm planning to only do gentle movement videos and a walk for the rest of the day.

Lying down is a great idea, thank you. I have a lot of trouble finding a comfortable seated position on a chair.

How does your brain feel about a rest day. Even professional athletes do those. A day or a couple of days a week when you do no exercise whatsoever. Your muscles need the recovery time. And then gentle movement on other days.

It’s great that you like your therapist. If she is wary of discussing your eating disorder though, she may not be the right therapist for you. You may not need a specialist eating disorder therapist, but you do need someone who will explore this with you.
Can you talk to her about it?
it sounds as though things are really hard for you at the moment, so I wish you well

I mean this kindly (my DD has Anorexia so I am a little more informed than some) but the info you have given and continue to give suggests that you are very unwell. It hurts to sit, you are so thin that your family is extremely worried when they see you and you may not be allowed to fly. Your illness is choosing a story (for example, you say you will drop weight if you stop exercising because you will lose muscle: your body is trying to survive and won’t have the energy for muscle growth at this stage because you are not eating) and as others have pointed out, you are seeking validation from this forum.

We cannot advise because we don’t know the whole story and we are not experienced in eating disorders. As demonstrated, those that do advise are, honestly, endangering you, because they are colluding with the illness and telling you exercise is ok.

Please access specialist advice for your eating disorder. It sounds like you are already dangerously underweight. Exercise in that state can literally kill you.

Thank you. I'm so sorry to hear that your daughter is ill. I hope she is getting the right help.

I'm not as unwell as you suggest. Things aren't great but they aren't critical. I'm not struggling to sit because of my weight, it just hurts because of muscle stuff I think. I never find sitting very comfortable. At the moment it's worse and I can't sit in any position for more than a few seconds without moving in some way.

I'm in my mid-late 30s now so I've become quite good at filtering out the less helpful responses and focusing on the useful ones. The yoga and gentle, mindful movement suggestions have honestly really helped. So has the advice to be productive rather than just active and the advice to lie instead of sitting when I'm trying to relax a bit.

I'm also finding it useful to keep switching between tasks instead of just getting up and exercising more.

You sound really unwell, have you been checked out by your GP? You need your bloods checked, obs, ecg etc. Would supplement drinks help, at least in the short term? Are you on any medications? Some meds such as olanzipine are very useful in making that ED voice in your head quieter.

My dd is recovering from anorexia and I know how much the illness can take hold of a person. She is so much better now but she had to stop all exercise and eat a lot of food to get to recovery. The brain does eventually reprogram itself but it can take a while.

I agree with the pp that the exercise needs to stop completely.

Well done for acknowledging that you have a problem and need help. This is the first step. I hope the therapy is helpful.

I think the reason why professionals aren't answering your "how much" question is because it isn't healthy for you to have a specific target in your head at the moment.

A reasonable amount of exercise for someone who is wanting to keep healthy and active without being obsessive would be:

Per week
3 x 50 min moderate-intensity cardio activity OR 3 x 25 min vigorous-intensity cardio activity
2 x 30 min muscle-strengthening weights work

It may not be appropriate for you to drop down to this level immediately - you do not need the kind of exercise levels you have been doing from a physical health point of view but it's clearly more complex than that for you, and you need help to work out how to scaffold your mental health in other ways before you try to address that part of the problem. People with OCD fixate on a particular activity that they need to do. If you try to impose rules to limit your exercise you will just end up replacing one obsession with a different one and won't improve your mental health at all, so don't worry about any targets just work with your therapist on reducing your anxiety and allow the obsessive need for exercise to reduce at the pace that comes naturally as your mental health improves.

I don’t spend any time exercising. Never have.

That’s enough for me. Perhaps you should try it.

Did you know @FenceBooksCycle that about 10% of those with an ED die? That the death rate is the highest for mental illness? That those figures don’t change much? That there are people up and down the land who cannot stand up quickly without risking a heart attack because their bodies can’t cope for much longer?

Please, people, do not fuel this fire by making comments about how much exercise the OP should or can do: whatever the guidelines you are taking this from, they apply to people with healthy bodies and a healthy mindset. The OP needs to access targeted ED help and take the advice they are getting g which is NOT TO EXERCISE.

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