How do you motivate yourself when you are totally drained?

[Ankleblisters]

Would love some advice on how to motivate yourself to exercise when your body just doesn't want to and you haven't got even the tiniest bit of energy.

I cared for a loved one full time for the last five years and keeping my body strong was really important as it was so physically and emotionally gruelling. But I loved it.
She passed away very very suddenly nearly three weeks ago and I've found it really hard to keep going with my exercise regime. It feels like nothing matters and I don't have any drive to do anything except the things I still need to do for everyone else around me.

My exercise regime has gone from 45mins, five or six early mornings a week to one or two when I can drag myself out of bed before I 'have' to. I did also go for a long walk yesterday, which I really enjoyed.

My body doesn't want to do anything at all, everything feels so heavy and painful and I feel utterly utterly drained and exhausted. It's worth noting that this has also been an insanely busy few months at work, on top of all the extra things you need to do when someone dies. I feel totally spent.

But being strong and having healthy muscles is also really important to me, and having a healthy exercise routine has also been essential in keeping an old, long-standing eating disorder at bay. I'm really aware that as I exercise less, eating becomes more difficult.

Any tips on motivating yourself when every part of you just wants to lie on the sofa and watch shit on TV?

I'm sorry for your loss.

How about some yoga to get going? It is good for your body and mind.

You could get up and tell yourself you'll stop after ten minutes if you're not feeling up to it. Most people can manage ten minutes and you may end up doing longer,

I sometimes exercise while watching tv, just some ans exercises, leg raises, squats etc.

But be kind to yourself and if you're really not ready yet you don't have to force it.

By knowing that doing it will give me energy and my mental health will suffer if I don’t.

So sorry for your loss. Do the long walks until you feel ready to go back to ‘normal’ exercise. Walking is great for your body and mind. It’s only been 3 weeks, be kind to yourself.

At this lovely time of year, feeling drained as you do, I would emphasise the walks outdoors as they will be good for your mind as well as your body. Do you have a bicycle?

Perhaps start or finish with a 10-minute strength session or yoga session. from YouTube or wherever?
💐 for your loss. I know well how draining it is.

You're grieving and your body has gone into shutdown.

It's entirely normal to have physical reactions to stress.

Take it easy. Getting out for walks in nature is ENOUGH rn. You'll be ready to exercise more hardcore when your body and brain are recovering.

I lost my son 7 months ago and it took me a month to get to the gym. I forced myself to walk every day and it did make me feel better...I slept better too.
Then in January I broke my shoulder....but I continued with abs and legs. In April I was back at spin class 3 times a week and pilates.
I feel stronger and I am managing my grief well...I know it's not for everyone but it works for me. I want to be fit and mobile at 66 which thankfully I am. Look after yourself xx

What exercises were you doing before?

I think your body’s reaction to grief is completely normal so be gentle with yourself. But I do also think keeping up some exercise/routine will help your mental health.

agree about a nice walk outdoors/yoga/swimming etc. maybe adding in running and weights at the weekend after a lie in?

In answer to your question- how do I motivate myself? I don’t! I don’t allow myself to question as it’s way too easy to talk myself out of it! I just get up and go.

Once or twice a week plus getting outside for walks is plenty for now. But when I’m struggling I always remind myself how energised I feel after a workout. Be kind to yourself x

My goodness. You are grieving..your body and soul need rest and kindness. Please donr berate yourself for not "doing". This is a time.yo go with flow and respond to what your body is telling you it needs. You have been running on adrenaline for a while..now it needs rest.
You will exercise again in time. Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself.

Thanks everyone. I think more than anything what I needed to hear back from this post was a) that I'm allowed to exercise less than I was and that that's okay, and b) that I will get my motivation back and be able to enjoy it again.
I used to think I'd always be able to motivate myself and that my ability to drag myself out of bed at 5.45am on a dark freezing winter morning meant that I would never have an issue with motivation. The last few weeks, that hasn't been the case and it's suddenly been really impossible to push through. But your encouragement and suggestions for shorter, gentler options and outdoor walks has really helped.
I've realised one thing that was really getting in the way is that my motivation and my ability to push through anything and everything was because everything was for her. I wanted to be strong for her. I wanted to get out of bed for her. I wanted to be there for her.
I've been finding mornings really hard in particular. My entire daily routine has been based around her every single day for five years. But I suddenly realised that my exercise time doesn't actually HAVE to be first thing in the morning. Today I managed to do a 35 minute weight lifting Youtube video late morning and I did enjoy it. Tomorrow I'm planning a long walk out in the countryside with my father and sister and I've found a late morning time slot to do a 40 min upper body with weights workout on Tuesday and lower body with weights on Wednesday.
I think the message to take it gently and respond to my body is a really powerful one and perhaps this is also a time to change things up with my exercise routine overall and try some new things.
If anyone has any suggestions of fun things to try (other than dumbbell and cardio youtube exercise videos) let me know.

But also, thank you so much to everyone who replied 💐

I think the short answer to how to motivate yourself right now is ‘you don’t’ - as previous posters have said, give yourself permission to rest. Sorry for your loss.