Feeling body conscious :/ ... Am I too much of a muscle man

[Yassnass145]

I've always been able to build muscle very rapidly. For this reason I don't go to the gym.

I build muscle like crazy and I come from a family of body builders and power lifters.

I never minded when I was younger as I had a slim pre-mum frame. I also was proud of being so strong and I loved beating most of the guys at University in an arm wrestle.

A month ago I was at the park on a workout machine and was pushing my son for fun casually. After that day, my trapezius muscles exploded. I didn't even work hard but my upper body became huger than I thought it was.

I was looking in the mirror today and just looked so big and bulky. My arm muscles are huge and I've not stepped foot in the gym for 10 years :/

I am a normal weight but feel the pressure of losing more fat to lose some of the bulk from muscle.

My husband today commented, "wow you're bigger than me. It's fine though because it's all muscle." Something about that comment just got to me. It was the shock he had when he saw how big my shoulders and back muscles were.

If anyone can relate to feeling rubbish about their body please do share. Any positive words would help today.

As you age you will be glad of that muscle… muscle means strength! You’ll (likely) be able to keep your independence as you age, be able to lift, carry, move…

I get that it’s no consolation right now but it’s a good thing, really! Have a look at Gemma Atkinson on her instagram… she talks a lot about muscle strength and the value of it, and it might help you appreciate your superpower

Thank you xxx

I should be grateful and I am. I do think hopefully I'll have a strong back as I age. I think it's just the unattractiveness of looking so bulky despite being slim :/

I'll get over it. Thanks for the reply, I'll have a look!

Did they just pop suddenly from little exercise or have you always been built strong?

I think this deserves a big reframe.

There's a meme going round which goes something like: "I dont want to look skinny. I want to look like I can kick your ass".

Basically saying: strong is much better than thin.

I absolutely get it, I've had 40 years of intensely disliking my body, and one of starting to like it, and a big part of that for me has been going to the gym. I have biceps and abs and sinewy forearms for the first time ever, and i keep being surprised about it. I do actually have to remind myself that it's a good thing, after decades of social programming to aspire to looking like Barbie.

The female instructors at my gym are all muscular and gorgeous, not at all the willowy aerobics bunnies of yore.

I hope you'll get to the point of accepting and owning your strength, rather than trying to suppress it - good luck OP

I've always been built strong :/ I was looking at photos of me age 18 to check this was the case. I think I just notice it more now because I am bigger than I've always been (bmi 24 and not 22). I am losing pp weight slowly though.

Well today, the funniest thing happened. I was rowing a boat at a waterpark. It was a "lazy river" but I found it quite fun exercise.

A man on the boat next to me saw me coming up and tried to overtake me. But he had no idea I had these bkg trap and shoulder muscles built in me 🤣 He had no chance. I wasn't even being competitive but it made me think, well okay, maybe I should just get into rowing or a sport.

I'm just very bulky. Not like the muscley insta women, more like JoJo siwa bulky.

I definitely have a different type of aesthetic in mind that I find attractive. I think I'll reflect on why that is. I did love barbies as a child.

Thanks everyone ☺️

Very muscular people often have a bmi that is above what is officially in the healthy range (even if they are not remotely overwight). So I wonder whether you are perhaps misperceiving how 'bulky' your muscles are, given that your bmi is 24 and therefore not high.

It is easy to get into a mindset where you are seeing your body in an unreasonable and negative way, especially when you are dieting. Perhaps you are just really strong and have perfectly normal/lovely build?

Thank you for the comment. ❤️

I definitely can shed some weight as I've been slimmer before. I am slowly losing weight and it's been staying off. My fat percentage is about 22percent, so you are right about the BMI calculation. Though I'm not sure how accurate the machine is.

I am still confused though about my frame. I can't tell if I'm overweight or too muscly. I'll just have to see how things go. I think I'll be happy when my BMi gets to 22.5. 🤣😭

Strong muscles are finally being valued in women and long term they keep our metabolism up and keep us moving into old age.

My only gripe about getting stronger limbs is that often women's clothes aren't cut for muscles, so I often find that busts are cut too big, but the upper arms and back too snug. Being short, I can also struggle to pull sleeves up as there's too much fabric to pull up on my lower arms.
But I'd rather have these inconveniences if they help keep me moving in my 60s, 70, 80s where some of my older relatives have struggled.

mix cardio with weights to trim the fat while the muscle builds, if that’s what you want of course!
Don’t really like your husbands comment about it being okay because it’s muscle..