Wishful thinking at 45?

[Heatherbell1978]

I'm 45 and I've never felt as old and frumpy as I do now and I suspect this is my due to my weight gain. I'm not overweight but just look dowdy.
In my youth I was a real gym bunny, fit, healthy, size 8. I managed to get body back reasonably well post DS aged 36 but since DD aged 39 it's all gone downhill - too tired, too busy, lockdown etc, lots of excuses to not do much. I'm on holiday now and feel awful in a bikini and just can't be bothered making myself look nice in the evenings. We have a new gym opening near us soon - is it possible to overhaul my body at this age and be fit, slim and motivated again? I'm also peri menopausal which I suspect plays a part too.

We have a new gym opening near us soon - is it possible to overhaul my body at this age and be fit, slim and motivated agai

Yes absolutely but you need to take up an activity that you enjoy. There is no point joining a gym if deep down you do not want to join a gym.

Results are more about consistent effort over time rather than blasting it for 2 months then giving up because you do not enjoy it.

And with respect of nutrition please please ignore any suggestions of fad diets or intermittent fasting. Eat non processed foods and cut out sugary drinks and alcohol as much as possible, it is that simple.

Some of you are really inspiring and definitely persuade me it is worth pushing through my peri-slump and podge gains.
Thanks.

I was fit when I was younger, then for a job working shifts, gave up running, started smoking again etc.

Then decided at 40 to get fit again. It was going great and then at 41 I got diagnosed with cervical cancer. Treatment put me into menopause, I put on weight etc, not sleeping, always tired.

But I've got it back now. Hrt helped a lot. Back running and racing, did my first marathon in April at 44. Also started strength training which has helped a lot. And last month started pilates as well.

Ideally I want to strength train 3x a week. I think that will have the most benefit to how I look. Running keeps me slim but weights will sculpt me I hope. Just need more time to fit it all in.

I sucked up the skinny is best 90s thang... also the 'look youthful forever' thing which will probably never leave me.

I'm 43 and just joined a gym this year, never thought I'd actually use it but go 2/3 times a week for cardio and do 2/3 home workout sessions too. My body is totally different. Still size 10 ish but instead of little girlish narrow shoulders and hiding a fat hipped bottom half, I now have a strong core with wide shoulders and pert arse. I feel absolutely incredible. Strong recommend for exercise as a mental and physical treat.

Absolutely agree with those who have said that it is incremental change that will do it.

I wasn't even looking to lose weight but my period went AWOL and I had some blood tests. My test came back low and cholesterol was slightly high.

So upped the protein.

Also stopped caffeine past 1pm

And then it started. I was sleeping better, feeling unintentionally full (try getting 100g of protein in your diet) so the snacking stopped.

Then decided that I need some supplements to help with peri, so got a multi vit and cod liver oil.

Felt more alert, better mood

Then looked at benefits of other stuff. Chia seeds etc. also started reading re: gut biome. So added chia and kefir daily. Which all got a bit time consuming so I've condensed it down to a chia/kefir/seed/fruit mix for an early lunch, a clear protein drink at 4 and a normal dinner. If I fancy a piece or a bar of chocolate I will, or a packet of crisps. Life's too short.

I don't deny myself anything so if we go out, I enjoy myself but always have the lunch and protein and by the time I order I'm not greedy. I've had

I've lost 8lb since April without even trying and have tentatively tried exercise. Again, trying to get it into my daily life but I'll find a way that makes it automatic. Possibly cycling to work might do it.

I'm in such a better place for making these changes. The biggest difference is to my self esteem.

I've gone from one of those people desperately trying different diets to someone who has got their shit together. And it's addictive. I've signed up to the ZOE programme which starts in September to take it to the next level and I'm looking at quick wins to reduce UPF.

I've got a long way to go but I'm actually excited about the improvements and I'm enjoying all the little things like waking up after a good nights sleep, regular bowels, a flat stomach in the mornings, glowing skin, new hair growth (on my head, won't talk about elsewhere). You'll find plenty.

Lots of really motivating people on this thread!

I am you op. But also have 4 extra stone!
I really want to be slim.and fit again but it seems so far away.

It sounds like your mind needs more of an overhaul then your body. You sound like you have given up on your appearance generally not just in terms of fitness.

There is definitely some truth in this too. But I think if I could just commit to a routine of exercise then my mental health will bounce back.

Thanks for all the inspo ladies! The annoying thing is I'm not overweight so it would be a relatively 'easy' route for me as I don't have lots of pounds to lose - half a stone would be enough for me to feel good I think. But I just can't motivate myself and feel like I'm getting into a trap of feeling dowdier. I stopped getting my hair highlighted a year ago to save money and now hate the mousey brown hair I have too which adds to the dowdy look.

Feeling very envious on holiday of all the well turned out ladies at the resort we're at and I'm just feeling sorry for myself I think!

I can totally relate to this! I'm 39 and apparently a healthy weight and BMI but I feel sluggish. I had my first child at 22 and my second at 29 and ready to start looking after me again. I've just started working out at home and eating better. I'm joining the gym next week as they have a summer special on for 30 days from 14th July, then I can join as a member after that. I don't need to lose weight but I need to tone up and feel better mentally. Go for it!!

I agree with this completely - I'm just not a gym person. I have joined many times over the years and it all just goes to shit after a few weeks. I don't enjoy it.
A few months ago I joined up to a Reformer Pilates class, which I love. I now go 2 or 3 times a week, and actually look forward to it. I never thought I would be someone who enjoys exercise! (Don't get me wrong, I don't love every moment, but I enjoy the classes generally, and when I walk out of there I feel amazing).

It has been really good for my strength, flexibility and fitness, but also for my mental health. I started to feel better before I even saw any changes.

OP it sounds like you are in a rut, and maybe finding an activity you enjoy will give you a sense of taking control. The physical effects will be a bonus.

Another vote for Peloton here - I bike most days, do strength, barre, pilates, yoga. Even do meditation. My spare tyre has gone and my legs and arms are slowly toning. When I started 7 months ago I could hardly manage a 10 minute ride. Stamina is now improving all the time. I am 52.

I'm on a quest to lose roughly half a stone which being short, is easier said than done. I've been at it two months and am losing roughly a pound a month and lost an inch off my waist. It doesn't sound much, but there's no easy, motivating bloaty losses to get me started, and it's that awkward level of weight where it's enough to slow me down and affect the fit of clothes, but my body feels no metabolic

I gained it through the disruption of lockdowns, then a running injury. I've been running long distance but am currently training short distance more intensively, and that change of gear is helping and it's easier to fit in more consistently. I'm also upping my strength work.

When the weather warmed up, I started 5:2ing. I don't "diet" as in eating "diet" or restricted foods, I concentrate on veg/ salad and proteins and more careful consumption of carbs around my exercise plans. I'm not banned from eating things, I just defer it. I had already since New Year been focusing on more fresh food and better habits. Since 5:2ing I'm less snacky on my regular eating days and it had helped to reset to better, old habits that had slipped.

It's better to tweak and build fitness/ nutrition routines one at a time and let them stick and build.

A slightly different slant, I took up lifting in my 40s. I have changed my body in that it's strong and I have lots of muscle. I wouldn't say I have a 'bikini body'. But it absolutely changed the way I feel about my body. It's an awesome powerful thing I can do amazing stuff with. So that makes me think I'm amazing and consequently I have masses more self confidence. So I don't feel old and dowdy and frumpy etc cos the shift in my head is massive. I'm not trying to look like I did in my 20s. I'm not withholding fuel from my body to chase aesthetics.

So in a way I do have what you want from going to the gym, but not quite in the form you mention.

(And absolutely no judgement if it is the aesthetics that matter more. I spend a lot of time admiring my muscles so I'm in no way immune to that too)

A slightly different slant, I took up lifting in my 40s. I have changed my body in that it's strong and I have lots of muscle. ... I spend a lot of time admiring my muscles so I'm in no way immune to that

I am totally with you. Lifting and/or working out with weights is totally empowering and life-changing. And muscles are a thing of beauty, so you are allowed to admire them! 😎

It's never too late! I took up running age 48 and ran my first marathon before I was 50, I'm 57 now and decided to cut down on cardio and now lift 4 times a week with Caroline Girvan: The changes to my body comp are incredible due to her workouts, I just use dumbells and kettle bells at home: Life moving around in general is also so much easier, you won't regret doing resistance training!

I did it in my 50's by going back to the gym and fasting. Fell off the wagon so many times but back to size 8

I'm 60 next month and I lost a stone at the beginning of this year. Just by diet. It can be done.

I did it in my 50's by going back to the gym and fasting. Fell off the wagon so many times but back to size 8

That is the problem with fasting and other such ideas. It is not something that you will want to keep going with. Who wants to has set times when they are allowed to eat? or not allowed to eat?

Eat when you are hungry and stop when you are not.

Good food in a sensible quantity is the the must sustainable nutrition plan. However fitness "experts" will rarely tell you this because there is no plan that they can sell you.

Yes, I’m 43 and a mam of 5 and I’ve never been in better shape. I could never stick to any sort of exercise when I was younger but I seem to have developed discipline this year. I weight train 4x a week and it’s made a huge difference to my shape.

So many women who start weight training find it more sustainable and rewarding than other forms of exercise. I think it’s because it’s slow and steady and feels less tiring. One isn’t out of breath so much, though it’s still sweaty work. I find that it feels tremendously empowering. And it doesn’t take long to notice a physical difference, both in terms of fitness and appearance. I was amazed how quickly my bingo wings disappeared!

Am 49. I joined a gym 6 weeks ago. Go 3 times a week for resistance training. Not necessarily losing much weight, but definitely converting fat to muscle. The difference in my core and thighs in particular has been really noticeable. (Bingo wings still flapping, alas!)

It can be done.

46 here, FT job, 2 kids, I train 6 days a week. Monday to Friday I get up at 530am and train for about 45 mins, 2 days Caroline Girvan, 2 days cardio at the gym and 1 day 8km run.
on Saturday I park run, I usually win my age group and finish in the top 10 ladies.

I’m not naturally athletic, no sports at school and did nothing in my 20s - I’ve just got here through being consistent and committed.

You can do it OP!

I am 48 and have struggled with exercise all my life. Only non sporty one of the family as a kid, married a sporty person, bred sporty kids. Am overweight, work very full time and peri menopausal.

Whilst I have done a bit of swimming/running/yoga over the years and enjoyed elements of it I've never got the buzz. I joined a newly opened chain gym 3 months ago as I really needed to do something for my health. Started strength training first in my own and now with a pt. I really like it, get the buzz and whilst still overweight can see a change in my body. I woke up this morning with a bit of doms and I grinned as yesterday I pushed myself and went up a weight on almost everything by myself. Yay me!

For me, going to a gym rather than doing it at home is more motivating (I only pay 20 quid a month). It's more of a commitment although it really helps that the gym is less than 2 miles from my house with a big car park so very very easy to get to. Also my pt is wonderful and helps me no end. DH had to convince me but it's an investment into my health.

Had my first gym session yesterday in ages and loved it. Did some cardio. Then weights. The rowing machine is my new best friend 😆 Aching a bit today, but so worth it.