Just be who you are

[Biscuitsrock]

Hi there

I'm new to this. So stick with me.

I've recently come off of social media. Facebook and Instagram. Anyone else?? When I have it. It consumes me. In a world where we all spend too much time on our screens. Not wanting our kids to be on devices all the time. Thought was time for me to have a break. I get so addicted to scrolling. And whilst scrolling I'm not doing anything productive.
The pressure on us as women/parents/wives/partners/friends is soo immense.
If we believe everything we're now meant to love housework and have a firm routine with it too. If this works for you I'm so proud of you. But it doesn't work for everyone.
I have found myself on a Sunday evening after having a lovely chilled family weekend with my husband and 2 sons looking on my socials. Turning to my husband and telling him how awful our life is because of the photos I've seen of others
Despite knowing we only post "those" photos and knowing I've had a wonderful weekend. It hasn't stopped this nagging feeling I'm not doing enough and I'm not good enough. Even though I am good enough and I am enough. See what it does to my brain. So I have a break and it makes me feel better. I really hope this makes sense to at least one other person out there.
We are all supposed to look a certain way too. This is something I can not live up to. I do enjoy going to exercise classes and sweating. But I will never be SLIM or be posing in a thong... you know those posts.... I have too much cellulite, stretch marks, love food too much and also an ileostomy which means I have a bag on my belly I pooh in to. I'm going to be 44 in a couple of weeks and I've finally come to love myself as I am. Wobbly bits and all. I think my point is and I've gone off it a little is.... love yourself. Be yourself. Don't try to be something or someone you think you should be. Most of us have the same insecurities as the next person. Some are better at hiding it than others that's all.
Take in a deep breath and be who you are...... and be kind. That's another topic....

Well, I don't do much of social media except watching youtube videos of DIY, and fun stuff that don't get under my skin lol

I think giving it up is the right thing for you, especially if you struggle to accept what you have and constantly compare yourself.
We all have stretch marks, and other skin issues, I still have acne and I'm 34 :/ ... not sure when they plan to go away, but they're clearly staying!

House work, I have few hours for on Saturday where I turn my flat upside down and make it spotless clean to remain clean for the rest of the week, but that's because i have no kids! So it does remain clean mostly.

Do try to get yourself into a routine when it comes to planning your day to day activities, I find when I have no plans that I waste so much time on youtube... where as on the nights I plan my next day, I get so so much accomplished...

I think if you are constantly feeling like you don't match up to others you have a bigger problem than Facebook.

Social media isn't the cause, it's just a big platform for people to share. Your self esteem needs work whether you use instagram or not.

It does seem you have been unlucky in the groups you are in.

I'm many in running groups, and they are fantastically supportive, irrespective of size/shape/performance.

Are other sports less so?

(You've posted in the Exercise topic, so the natural assumption is difficulties with sport and fitness groups)

What kind of exercise do you take, or are interested in starting? Perhaps the Exercise regulars can recommend more welcoming groups than the ones you complain of