Misti - I think the opposite of "nationalist" is (or should be wink) internationalist - which, as it happens is what the SNP consider themselves to be, as they want to welcome all nationalities to Scotland, allow all those who live and contribute in Scotland to vote and look outwards to the EU and from there the world
But I get where you're coming from as I'd have voted No in 1979 (was just too young to vote, but still counted as a NO vote confused) for very similar reasons. I am against ethnic nationalism - but the nationalism that the SNP espouses (which it has done for at least the 20 years I've voted for them) is civic nationalism: not blood based, but because you want to be Scottish/live/work in Scotland.
I wouldn't have voted SNP in 2015 (not that I was here then) because I didn't want a smaller, navel-gazing country to live in. I'm more than happy to vote SNP now, because ditto. I would far rather be living in a small Scotland with a chance to join a large EU, than a small Scotland, tied to a tiny, angry, England.
I like consensus, I like compromise, I like being safe from extreme parties passing heartless laws that damage society, environment, individuals. I like being part of a community that is striving to improve.
I do not like being part of a community that thinks people are disposable in the race for greater wealth. So, to add to the metrics, fuck the wanker Boris and his wanking advisers.