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Ethical dilemmas

Should I complain after a nurse shared my 16-year-old's medical details?

707 replies

Midglet · 29/08/2026 10:00

My 16yr old had an incident this week that required medical intervention. They didn’t want people, even immediate family and close relatives, to know until they had underwent the operation and we respected those wishes. However a theatre nurse recognised their name and before my child was even under anaesthetic, the nurse had texted a distant relative of ours and divulged that not only was our child in for an operation , but the nature of such. The child was in theatre for four hours but within twenty mins of them being taken in the distant relative , who doesn’t have our mobile numbers, then started calling the hospital demanding details of our child’s prognosis and treatment. Thankfully we had been tipped off very quickly as the relative started contacting other family members ( who themselves weren’t aware of the situation until they themselves contacted us to see what was happening) and were able to request staff to refrain from divulging such. After several failed attempts the relative then turned up at the hospital and demanded access to our child, by which point they were out of surgery. The ward staff asked our 16 yr old ( with us present) if they would like the relative to gain access and our child immediately burst into tears with the thought …the relative is particularly difficult at the best of times and the children try to avoid all contact by their own choice . Thankfully again the staff were able to refuse the relative entry into the ward (Although our child is 16 and should have been in the adult wards a lack of beds had resulted in them being housed in the children’s ward with better security) . Anyway I am sitting stewing about the actions of this initial theatre nurse divulging private medical information to a third party . I know this is a huge breach of confidence and I hope such would be a disciplinary if I was to raise a complaint but I don’t know if I should . The nurse is a friend of the relative hence why she reached out and my family are divided as whether to take action as it will cause trouble within the wider family. Hubby thinks I should just forget it to keep the peace but I think the theatre nurse should be made aware her actions were totally unacceptable. I’ve never complained about anything before . Your thoughts would be appreciated !

OP posts:
Soccermom2020 · 29/08/2026 21:35

Absolutely complain this a is a huge breach of GDPR very serious in medical practice.
She can't get away with this no way.

Dersie · 29/08/2026 21:37

WorkingItOutAsIGo · 29/08/2026 10:02

Completely unacceptable and you must report it. Otherwise you are allowing them to do it to the next person they know. And it's important that your child knows you've got their back.

This is a serious breach of confidentiality, the data protection police could strike said nurse off for such discrepancy.

TheOnlyWayIsIlford · 29/08/2026 21:40

So what are your thoughts, @Midglet ?

Aryahpuff · 29/08/2026 21:53

I am absolutely outraged for you. I’m a nurse and I would 1000% put in a complaint with her employer and with the NMC. Your son was at his most vulnerable and expected to have confidence in the professionals caring for him. I would not let this go.

DadBod84 · 29/08/2026 22:02

If it was me, I wouldn't want the person sacked but I would be absolutely fuming, would want them to acknowledge they made a terrible error of judgement and make damn sure it never happens again to anyone else under their care.

So yes, report, 100%.

Nurseposter123 · 29/08/2026 22:03

Years ago as a 22 year old new nurse (am 37 now and pretty senior) I was working in a private hospital in London and someone very famous was a patient.

I didn't breath a word to anybody, even my boyfriend (now husband and still doesn't know!)

It's a code of conduct for a reason. Our health is private and I am a professional.

Gemstonebeach · 29/08/2026 22:13

I’m surprised the hospital aren’t taking their own action if it played out like you’ve said.

Mumof305 · 29/08/2026 22:15

This is outrageous. I am not usually in the mind to complain but I would absolutely 100% be making a formal complaint and contacting the NMC. I’m so sorry your daughter went through this, please don’t drop it

superchick · 29/08/2026 22:16

Report it 100%. I work in a (non-medical) setting with access to highly confidential information and would expect to be sacked if i used the information in this way.

You also have to model to your DD how to stand up for yourself and others. Too many women let themselves get walked all over because they don't want to cause a scene but you need to show her how to assertively defend herself against this sort of mistreatment.

Thegirlwhowent · 29/08/2026 22:19

This is appalling. I'd report it immediately.

AppleDumplingWithCustard · 29/08/2026 22:26

As a nurse I would say absolutely report. If I saw patients outside just going about their daily business I wouldn’t even acknowledge them unless they approached me first.

TheEdgyMoose · 29/08/2026 22:29

This story doesn't sound very believable to me but, if it's true, then absolutely you should report it.

Silverbirchleaf · 29/08/2026 22:31

TheEdgyMoose · 29/08/2026 22:29

This story doesn't sound very believable to me but, if it's true, then absolutely you should report it.

Op not been back, so wondering also
jf it’s a troll thread…

RivieraJamming · 29/08/2026 22:37

Absolutely complain! This is a data breach and breach of confidentiality. You might just feel like brushing it off but it is a serious matter and grounds for dismissal of the nurse.

Gowlett · 29/08/2026 22:39

If nothing had come of it, then I’d leave it…
But look at what happened! Unacceptable.

TheEdgyMoose · 29/08/2026 22:41

Silverbirchleaf · 29/08/2026 22:31

Op not been back, so wondering also
jf it’s a troll thread…

The nurse would have to be idiotic to send a text like that and the actions of the distant relative are unhinged.

thelonghaul · 29/08/2026 22:44

Shockingly unacceptable behaviour. I'd definitely be complaining. Keeping the peace is not a good enough reason to allow a breach of your child's (or anyone's) personal and confidential information. If you don't complain you're basically saying what she did is OK and therefore ok to do it again at any point in the future.

PetethePlumbersToolkit · 29/08/2026 22:47

It's a serious breach of patient confidentiality. Complain and demand that the hospital also reports their GDPR breach to the information commissioner. The nurse should be on a disciplinary if not also a fitness to practice referral to the NMC.

Chilly80 · 29/08/2026 23:00

Definitely report her

Aleveldilemma · 29/08/2026 23:16

There’s no way this happened

prh47bridge · 29/08/2026 23:17

This is a huge breach of confidentiality. You should definitely complain. If she felt that it was ok to do this, who knows what other confidential information she has accessed without authorisation and/or shared inappropriately.

Stablegirl2012 · 29/08/2026 23:29

This is horrendous, definitely complain! I hope your daughter is ok

nocoolnamesleft · 29/08/2026 23:40

Sounds like a sackable offence to me. (Hospital doctor)

SweetnsourNZ · 29/08/2026 23:50

Report. Protect your child, not this evil gossipmonger.

ToWhitToWhoo · 30/08/2026 00:53

Yes. That is most unprofessional of her.