do i stay in my damp cold expensive house or lie through my teeth so my kids can have a nice home??

[bellarose2011]

just looking for some advice really, i am a single mother to 2 DD, 10 months and 2yrs.
we currently live in a 3 bed semi detatched house, it has an old back boiler which makes the gas bills huge yet we are still always freezing. the garden is a vertical hill (literally!) there is mold growing on the kids bedroom wall. the double glazing doesn't work and there is puddles of water on all the windowsills every morning. i hate it!!
in the area i live there is a shortage of social housing and my name is on all council/housing association lists. my only hope is a house from an estate agents. but of course they won't accept DSS.
now i get my housing benefit paid to me so there is no reason i need to disclose this other than it being dishonest. but i know i would be a great tenant, i have never not paid my rent, i'm a clean freak and have no pets.
i have found a perfect house that i can afford and have the application form in front of me, i know i won't get it if i tell the truth. i have a friend who runs her own business and would say i worked for her. i just don't know what to do??
the eatate agents use MARAS, will my bank tell them where my funds come from?

I planned to stay at home with my dc as well, unfortunately Exp left me a week after dc2 was born so I had to go back to work when she was 7 months and dc 1 was 2yrs. Shit happens but you get on and deal with it, your situation is not unique.

For the record I also live in a 3 bed house and claim a small amount of hb, but my ll is well aware of this. I don't think I am owed my house, and wouldn't lie in order to live here.

'and i am only stating that i couldn't leave MY baby. lots of my freinds and family went straight back to work after having babies and that is there choice.
i have personel reasons for not wanting to leave my baby with strangers.

i am pissed off that people are saying that i have chosen a 'lifestyle' '

You have! By lying on an application. Instead of confronting your landlord, even getting served notice and then being made homeless and going to the top of the council/HA list, that's what you're doing. You want a nice house and to not leave your baby.

How is your baby more precious than anyone else's? It's not anyone's choice to do that. They do it for money, money to pay for you to get a house they can't get by lying. Can't you see how that royally pisses someone working their arse off for minimum wage?

i accept that at the time i was lucky that we lived in a country that it is a choice.
do you really believe that it is because of someone like me that has worked most of my life that the government is doing what there doing?

I really dont think the OP wants to work. She has a sense of entitlement that she 'has chosen not to work'. She looks down at others who do and wonders why she cannot have what they have. She is in a dream world where others pay for her mistake and when she doesnt get her 'entitlement' she lies. She doesnt see anything wrong with that - until she gets caught and I agree with other posters.

There will be someone who will spot what she is doing. They dont need to leave their name to report her. It will be pretty easy for the DWP to find out what has happened. And then she will appear in the Daily Mail and say she has been picked on

So I suspect despite all the good advice on her she will continue with her orginal plan.

Well if you didn't live in England you would have to leave your baby like the majority of mothers world wide. There are lots of options for childcare, I gave you 3 just then. You are choosing to live on benefits, ok but you don't get to have a type of house that a working person that slogs their arses for.

that is your choice though?
you have chosen to follow the rules and do what the government wants you to do, even though you would rather be at home with your kids.
you can't blame other people for your choices. you could do what im doing if you wanted to.
you made your choice and now your bitter about it, maybe it was the wrong one?

I don't think it is benefit bashing. DH's grandad was the eldest of 11 in a two up two down mining cottage - he went down the mine at 14 to help put food on the table for the others. They most certainly didn't have central heating and most certainly couldn't afford it - they could barely afford the latter and even then I don't think there was often enough when they were all at home.

You don't work, you have two children, you live in a three bed house and the rest of us are paying for you to do so. You could be living in a one bed flat with you in the living room - cheaper to heat and cheaper to provide. If you want a good life you have to go to work. I do - every single day (and I don't have to but something in me needs to go to work for my own self esteem) but then I was brought up to expect to take personal responsibility for my actions.

I truly suspect Bella that you are not particualrly old, I heard a 18 year old in a cafe once with a young child say to her friend that she was entitled to claim benefits - really.....

And I think you should take your lucky stars that you live in a country that supports your choices. And make no mistake - they are YOUR choices. Not mine or anyone elses -yours. Surely you must realise that someone is funding your lifestyle and have others have said it is YOUR choice.

i will get the same housing benefit wether i get a 1 bed flat ot 4 bed house.
I have to make up the difference to be able to get this house.
i will go without to make the rent up at the end of the month.
people on houding benefit don't just get whatever rent they ask for.
it is a set amount so really it doesn't matter what house i get.

'that is your choice though?
you have chosen to follow the rules and do what the government wants you to do, even though you would rather be at home with your kids.
you can't blame other people for your choices. you could do what im doing if you wanted to.
you made your choice and now your bitter about it, maybe it was the wrong one? '

What the government wants me to do? I don't give a toss for them, bella. But I do care about getting served notice for lying to my landlord because there's a clause in every tenancy agreement I've signed that says if I lied or was false in obtaining it it's a breach of my tenancy and they can therefore end it. And you know, I felt I owed my kids more than that. Bitter, no.

But due to the idea that benefits claimants are liars, like you, when we actually did need benefits, because our daughter was dying, we got treated like criminals and have had to go through even more hell.

Yes, you're legally entitled to claim on a child under 5. You want to lie, go ahead, but if you're caught out, and you're pretty silly if you think you won't because again, if I knew you and was one of those people you claimed 'chose' to 'dump' their child with strangers to work, and I found out you lied to get that house, I'd grass you right up.

Can I be solution focused again ? I am concerned that you are putting all your eggs in one basket with regards to this other house rather than concentrating on the here and now.

OP in my opinion you need to do something urgently about your current property before the winter really sets in.

As I have said your landlords have a duty to maintain the house to a suitable standard.

Also wondering if you could consider taking in a lodger to share costs. This would help with heating bills.

I honestly wouldn't worry about the extra blankets. I grew up in a house where the ice was on the inside of the window on winter mornings. I do think the dampness and the inefficient boiler should be tackled. That is what you pay your rent for.

'i will get the same housing benefit wether i get a 1 bed flat ot 4 bed house.'

You'll get it the LHA for a two-bed home in your area. If you can find a ll to take you on for a 1-bed and the LHA cap is lower than the max for a 2-bed, you'll make out.

Believe me, plenty of us are plenty savvy about benefits.

i understand now whu you are all so pissed off.
yes if someone could just make a claim for housing benefit for any amount they wanted and any house they wanted that would be out of order.

each council has a set amount, here it is 70 qiud a week.
doesn't matter if your rent is 150. you get 70.

so i want a house that is 100, i have to pay that,

i don't smoke, drink, go out, buy clothes, drive or have any luxuries.

but if i want to take money out of my benefits to top up the rent waht is wrong with that?

This government funds your choices you should be grateful for that! Personally this sort of thread makes me mad, someone has a sense of entilement, doesnt want to fund their lifestyle choices (others can do that!) and starts getting snotty about working mothers. We are the people giving you your HB and whatever else you get because you chose the wrong man.

Could someone remind me exactly what that has to do with me! And you choose to critize them...

You will be quite fucked paying all that heating and then 14% of your rent once universal comes in.....

Frankly, I don't think you should have the choice. You spend other people's money and should be provided with something that is considered adequate - yes adequate - for your family's needs. In my opinion, that is shelter, warmth, three beds (beds, not bedrooms), a bathroom and lavatory, and cooking facilities with sink and running water, cooker and fridge. You also need three comfortable chairs and a table that seats three for proper family meals. I would say about 500 square metres would do it.

I totally understand that you want to live in a better home with your children, yours does sound diabolical and I wouldn't be adverse to telling the odd lie to keep a roof over my kids heads, but I would have to look very carefully at who else this would affect. In this case - your LL and I couldn't do that to someone else.

It's not necessarily a judgement the LL will be making on your situation - but his mortgage can be revoked :( If that's the case, you being the perfect tennant and keeping the place spotless wont make one bit of difference he will have to evict you or risk losing his mortgage.

I would talk to him first and see if it's the EA's making life easy for themselves or if the landlord is bound by the terms of his mortgage.

I have read the thread, but might have missed it, why can't you rent one of your mum's properties again?

well expat, i would not get so angry or invovled in anyone elses life that i would feel the need to grass them up. why? its not going to benefit you.
again sounds very bitter.

i am sorry that you were treated like criminals when you really needed the help but that is just the way it is,

p.s im no where near 18!!

my mum converyede her house and it is now huge and already rented out.
she has offered if it becomes available.

I think the problem with all of this is the the OP doesnt want to work, has a issue with people that do but also wants what everyone else has - without paying for it. I really dont think we are going to change her mind.

She will lie, she will get caught. And then claim the DWP are picking on her and she was 'forced' to do it. Got fed up with this thread now so off to watch a bit of TV!

ok this is 58m sqaured. anyone convert that into foot?

Do you really know who is funding yur lifestyle and your choices....

US!

Could the father not help in terms of money? They are his children too?

Is he in the picture or not? It must be hard doing it all on your own.

Still, I think you would take a huge risk by lying.

i won't report your post, it just puzzles me that anyone could call someone a bitch that they have never met?
any way i agree post done.

thanks for all the constructive advice everyone