My mum climbed out the window!

[Hellacute]

this is not going to be perfectly coherent - got a call from my moms neighbour that she she knocked on his door at 6am. He brought her back and the house was locked. He called me and I ran up and used my key.

the Key was inside and the back door was locked so I was really confused. Mom thought she was in hospital and mentioned that she climbed out a window in the hospital to get out so I checked and she climbed out a window at home (she hasn’t been in hospital).

what do I do now. She’s 83 ans lives alone. I’ve got a call in to get her seen by southdoc to see if it’s maybe an infection.

UTI , early dementia signs or sleep walking ?

Are you in west cork as we have south doc locally.

Emergency doctor, she needs to go into emergency respite unless someone can stay with her, uti’s especially can cause delirium but it could be dementia progression too. If the emergency doctor isn’t of any use you need to drive her to a&e, they do know what to do at least, and some hospitals have contracted beds in the community for just this situation

I’m going to try and get her an appointment tomorrow with her regular gp and see if we can get things moving regarding diagnosis and the community nurse involvement.

But the problem with all this is she won’t go! She’s ‘normal’ now and probably would be judged competent.

plus our hospital is absolutely overrun with the flu and the last time I was in a&e the wait was 14 hours.

It might be time to start looking at moving her to a residential facility where she will be much safer.

Oh boy, I’ve been where you are OP. I’m really sorry, it’s very hard. Good news about the antibiotics. If she isn’t improving fast then take her to A and E, a kidney infection can be very serious. Locking the windows won’t be approved by an OT. If there’s a fire then you can face serious consequences. I would put up a ring camera so that you can monitor her while she recovers.

It's so hard to deal with this. After his dementia started, my dad started to just wander out early in the morning leaving the front door wide open. It's frightening to realise how little you can do. A&E will take so long, it's not fit for purpose now, and they may discharge her anyway. The air tag or similar might be your best bet.

Could you and your children stay with your Mum, until she's seen by a GP? If the out-of-hours GP has prescribed antibiotics for a UTI, then I assume he did do some tests? Urine test? Or is the antibiotics simply as a precaution because it's not known if your Mum has a UTI or not? Has the change happened suddenly? Or have you noticed a decline in your Mum's mental capacity? I agree with you, try and get your Mum a urgent GP appointment tomorrow. Do you have a pot that a urine sample could be taken in the morning and given to the GP? Hopefully, it is an infection rather than your Mum losing mental capacity.

Do ring cameras need wi-fi? Because mom doesn’t have wi-fi - she doesn’t use any form of tech.

Those who are saying to put your Mum in residential care, you can't! If the OP's Mum has any mental capacity and refuses, that's the end of the discussion. Unfortunately, things have to get really really bad, before you can take a person's right to choose away from them. My Mum's friend has dementia, and in all honesty she shouldn't have been living by herself, but she point blank refused a home or any home help. She accidentally set fire to her kitchen, and it was only at that point, her daughter's were able to step in.

Exactly. I know she doesn’t want to go into a home and she does have capacity.

The antibiotics are a precaution because she couldn’t produce a sample.

We have just got a wifi camera for outside our house. You can put them inside as well. Works on the wifi and you can access the camera from your phone from anywhere
Also window alarms, they are cheap to buy and fit.
We also have window catches for the kids that only let the windows ooen a certain amount but I dont know if this is a good idea in case of fire.

Think I need to get wi-fi

My Mum became very confused and thought her Gs had hung himself in her cellar. It was a UTI and once treated she was absolutely fine again . Another time she hallucinated that there were cats in her house . Get your Mum checked ASAP .

It sounds like delirium, which is fluctuating cognitive impairment caused by physical illness. What does your Mum think she needs to be safe tonight and over the coming weeks? (Delirium can take weeks to resolve). Can she stay with a relative or friend? Would she be willing to? Can a relative or friend stay with her? If she is willing to wear a tracker it’s the person tracking her who needs the internet connection. You can set trackers to alert if the tracker leaves set parameters.

She’s not willing to sleep anywhere other than her house. She has a cat who is her entire reason for living and will not leave.

Shes been at my house since 7am and is making noises about wanting to flog home but I’m convincing her to stay.

it’s my daughters 9th birthday today so trying to be around for that.

I will get her to the regular gp tomorrow (with a sample hopefully) and see about getting wi-fi in her house to keep an eye on her.

As somebody tha works in care get infection markers checjed(blood test) and urine infection checked few days could be different but if no joy u need ro think long term social services assessments love sorry

One more question - if I get a urine sample from her today can I keep that until tomorrow and we see the GP (hopefully)

she doesn’t like to do things ‘on demand’ and I don’t know what time she might get an appointment.

Are you an only child?

Yes. I’m married with kids.

If it’s more than a few hours, it’ll need to be refrigerated. It can be refrigerated for maximum of 24 hours, but after that, the sample will be affected. It’s better to get a fresh one if possible, but if it’s absolutely impossible, then this is the best option.

Thank you!

No worries! I had to do the same myself in November. But you need to speak to the GP and your mum, as samples are supposed to be “clean catch” (you wee a tiny bit first, and then start catching the wee after that). If your mum was incapable of giving a sample, is she able to do a clean catch? Also, you’ll ideally want a sterile container if possible at all; you can pick them up at any chemist, and maybe some open early tomorrow?

I’m so sorry about all this, OP - I’m sure your DD will still have a lovely birthday, and I hope your mum feels better.