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What am I supposed to do now?

1 reply

BrainstormGreenNeedle · 06/11/2024 07:48

I think my mother's mind is failing but it's not presenting with a typical memory loss. It's more behavioural and mood based stuff. Unless if her memory is much worse than what I realised.

She told me last year after she got the oil tank filled that the tank needs replacing by the next oil fill. The delivery guy said it.

By Christmas she wanted to get another delivery of oil and I reminded her that we have to use the oil in the tank so that we can start replacing it in the spring. I was only met with snarliness and anger from her.

The same thing happened again in the spring.

Basically by the summer - the same thing happened. She has no intention of ever getting that tank replaced.

It's not a money thing. She has the money. Also I was willing to help with it too. So it's a money thing with her.

She's just completely ignorant to implications of ignoring this.

I didn't know what to do. I emailed the oil company back in September to see what we can do about this. I was asked to call back on a number and I was talking to a lovely guy. He said he was going to put a notice on her account to not deliver any more oil to her until the tank is replaced. The notice would have acted as a push to get the work done.

So my mother picked up the phone yesterday and she rang the oil company for more oil and nothing was said to her. The oil company still came and delivered oil to her.

The tank is rusty and over 30 years old. It's an environmental hazard at this stage. My mother has no awareness over the shit storm that may happen if this is ignored.

What am I supposed to do here? She's ignoring it. The oil company is ignoring this.

It's all so stressful.

NadineMumsnet · 07/11/2024 16:30

Hello OP, we are really sorry to hear you are feeling this way.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources. You can also go to the Samaritans website or email them on [email protected]. Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek RL help and support as well.

We also like to remind everyone that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

All the best, OP Flowers

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