Not fit to drive…but what to do?

[Eek3under3]

Family member (mid 80s) is not fit to drive. Medical issue that would automatically mean they are not allowed to drive if declared to dvla, along with total disregard for other road users/ pedestrians.

Lives rurally and relies on car but is (literally) an accident waiting to happen. Multiple people have witnessed them mounting the kerb, parking on junctions/ blocking the road, actions that have caused various other vehicles (including a bus) to swerve into oncoming traffic.

wwyd? Feels like a moral obligation to do something…but what? Has been spoken to a number of times but gets v defensive. Even if they were anonymously reported to dvla I doubt they would stop driving.

help!

Thank you for being concerned and taking action, @Eek3under3 . An elderly driver drove into my mum a few years ago. She was crushed between two cars (she was standing, putting some shopping in the boot when he drove into her).

She was flown to hospital by air ambulance and had to have emergency surgery on her legs. Took months to recover and she's severely scarred. Also suffered PTSD.

The driver gave up his licence to the police on the spot, but the damage was done.

Had to report an elderly relative in a similar situation some years ago.

Living in a rural location isn't always a great retirement plan. If you have the money for taxis etc that's one thing but most don't especially if the taxi has a 10 mile drive to get to you in the first place.
I think we all know shopping deliveries etc can be arranged. Many actually live in villages without any public transport at all and most of my relatives have become increasingly stubborn with age. Nobody likes to rely on others for basic transport needs but if you are not safe to drive then there is no option.

Report. I reported my mum and her license was removed. It was inconvenient for her but she was dangerous.

Do they realise this: “You could be fined up to £1,000 if you do not tell DVLA about a condition that might affect your ability to drive safely. You could also be prosecuted if you have an accident.” From DVLA here

I think their insurance is likely to be invalid if they haven’t declared a relevant condition. So it’s invalid even if they are in an accident which isn’t their fault.

You should report to the GP and the DVLA. Why are you not doing both?

We had this with my MIL, eventually the DCs sabotaged her car.
I actually refused to go in the car with her but the DCs didn’t believe me!

I have reported my husband (who still thinks he can drive) because he had a stroke and cant speak. He also has other cognitive issues. It's easy. I no longer drive because I have AMD and I can't see properly. I gave my car to my daughter!

FILs car is currently sat on our driveway due to this.

This case was not so far from me. A 16 year old killed by a man who had been advised to stop driving a few days previously

I remember thinking about it as my father aged, but in the event, he willingly gave up his car on his own accord as he was aware of his reaction time not being what it was.

Good luck with your Mum.

Just to say you can also report the car/person to crimestopper anonymously so if they do continue driving they should be stopped.

Local to us a lady was killed by an elderly gentleman who just got muddled and drove straight whilst accelerating instead of braking whilst turning a corner. Please report immediately.
Also try talking to AgeUK as they often have schemes with local agencies for driving/taxi services during the day. They will be at a cost but perhaps cheaper and friendlier than the local taxi firm. That said if you discuss it with a local cab firm they can be very helpful sometimes too.

Thank you for inputs. I will absolutely report to dvla but don’t think relative will give a shit tbh.

Widowed a few years ago and since then has no interest in life at all so takes careless, unnecessary risks. Mobility scooter has been suggested but rejected.

I think we could suggest some of the friends come round to her house.

@Eek3under3 a mobility scooter! (as a pp suggested)
my nan willingly gave up her car because she didn't have the confidence to drive anymore and she got a mobility scooter.
She lives in a little village and uses it to get to lunch club,doctors,her local friends houses etc

@Eek3under3 sorry posted before I saw your update. My nan was like that too till she went to a place that sold them and she found one she liked

Take the leads off the battery. She won't be able to start the car. If she has AA or the like, either contact them and say she's been reported to the dvla for being unfit to drive or leave a note in the engine bay saying the same.

Or you could hide/take the keys.

Good luck, it's a tough thing to do!

We disabled my grandfather's car (he had no idea) as he had dementia and horrific eyesight.

Would your relative move?

It is not the GPs responsibility to report medical conditions to the DVLA, it is the driver.

If someone who should not drive made it clear to the GP that they didn't intend to report or refrain from driving, they would have an obligation to report at that stage, due to the risk of harm to others.

Honestly, it's not a position that a GP wants to be in. I'm sure most would do it but it would likely be the end of any relationship with that patient, and perhaps any GP relationship with that patient. They also tend to tell the GP what they want to hear (ie they will promise to report and then not do it).

Report to DVLA, then to the police if you see or hear of them driving.

You're absolutely right there is a moral obligation to do something. Imagine facing a family that have just lost a parent, child or sibling in court when asked to provide any evidence or insight into this relative's prior driving incidents.

The police will normally handle this pretty sensitively - if you know they're going out at 9am to the shops every day - tell the police and they'll park in an unmarked nearby and stop them before they do any damage.

What are you going to do then? Just let them still drive? You want that in your conscious if they kill someone? If you think they need stopping then someone needs to do some thing. Is it you or someone else?

Please take the car keys away and sell the car.

After the elderly dementia struck lady killed a baby in his pram a couple of weeks ago do anything you can to stop the driving .

I live rurally without public transport and just have to accept the day will come when I have to move to a town or similar when I'm no longer safe to drive .

The DVLA wrote to my aunt to say that her licence was to be renewed. She was indignant when family members had refused to get in the car with her because they felt unsafe. Her GP had referred her for a memory test but said she could keep driving until the results came through!
I filled in the licence form on my aunts behalf and added a covering note about her failing a memory test that week and said the memory clinic recommended that she gives up driving. She had sadly lost her spatial awareness as part of her dementia (really obvious in the memory test), and clipped wing mirrors, took bends on the wrong side of the road, forgot where the windscreen wipers/indicators were etc. Was also getting lost regularly on familiar routes.

She took the news about her licence being rescinded better from the dvla than she would take notice of the family! Do contact the dvla as his insurance and licence won't be valid if he's not declared a medical issue.

3 years ago in our town an elderly driver hit the accelerator rather than the brake when driving past our local shops, mounted the kerb and killed a man sitting on a bench.

Time to start talking to the relative about moving.

Contact the DVLA. GPs have no clout over this and better to come from family.

If her licence is removed and she still drives then report to police