Advice on putting together a photo album for Mum in home who no longer knows who I am?

[loveyouradvice]

Feeling a bit shellshocked - she's just had Covid, seemed fine but has really affected her dementia - she's leapt from knowing who we all are and able to chat about what we are doing to not knowing I'm her daughter when I stand in front of her.

I've been meaning to do a photo album with words for ages and it now feels rather urgent.

1. Will it help?
2. Any advice on best ways of doing it for someone with dementia ... who I imagine will look at it with her carers (I hope)

@Honeyroar
After reading your post a memory came back to me.
My mum was her Mothers double. Towards the end of her life all she wanted was her Mother. She would stand at the door of the home with her coat on waiting for the bus to take her home to her mother.
We had a full-length mirror in her room. She stopped in front of it because she saw her mother in it. She had a massive smile on her face telling me to come and see her mother.

[quote ParkheadParadise]**@Honeyroar
After reading your post a memory came back to me.
My mum was her Mothers double. Towards the end of her life all she wanted was her Mother. She would stand at the door of the home with her coat on waiting for the bus to take her home to her mother.
We had a full-length mirror in her room. She stopped in front of it because she saw her mother in it. She had a massive smile on her face telling me to come and see her mother.[/quote]
@Paradisethat has just made me cry. My DM has recently started asking for her Mum and Dad, it just breaks my heart. What a cruel disease it is. {sad}

@OnthePiste
You're right it is a horrible cruel disease. I don't think you realise that until you've lived with it.

Oh thank you all... it so helps knowing others have been along this rocky path...

Snapfish here I come.

I went in yesterday and took just photocopies of photos, which I'd written names and relationships on ... I was a bit nervous, thinking she might be insulted by this, but we had a lovely 40 minutes just looking through them, and her carefully reading names and relationships... and us having a laugh as my writing wasn't very clear with Granddaughter A .... And yes, her eyes lit up with both the picture of her aged about 12 with her pony, and very movingly the one of her wedding day

And yes, she wanted me to take them home - sweetly describing them as "very precious" "we need to look after them carefully"... though I did then ask again and she decided to keep just the three I suggested.

Wanda huge thanks for writing at length - really helpful and inspiring thinking of the things I can use which will trigger memories.

And I am LONGING to be able to get into her room and label all her photos Wheredoes ... lots of family photos around but unlabelled as when she went in she knew clearly who everyone was!

I've also found reading Contented Dementia very beautiful and heart-warming and am finding it easier going in and consciously being on Team Mum... even to the extent of eating the same pudding together in the same way - licking the yogurt lids together and then neatly putting the lids back on when we'd finished and lining them up... my following her lead... and it was lovely to see her relaxed and enjoying being with me. I love the image of enabling them to be in "Green" all the time and how we can help influence that.... Lots to learn ...and lots of heartbreak to come.... but already feeling stronger than that first sad day of visiting her post lockdown

[quote ParkheadParadise]**@Honeyroar
After reading your post a memory came back to me.
My mum was her Mothers double. Towards the end of her life all she wanted was her Mother. She would stand at the door of the home with her coat on waiting for the bus to take her home to her mother.
We had a full-length mirror in her room. She stopped in front of it because she saw her mother in it. She had a massive smile on her face telling me to come and see her mother.[/quote]
Aww, how lovely. It’s really heartbreaking isn’t it. My Mil also thought my husband (her son) was her husband and her grandson was her son. She thought her “husband” was having an affair when he said he was going home. Nowadays she doesn’t recognise any of us, but is happy in her little world.