We live a 30 min journey from my 78 year old widowed dad. My mum passed away 20 years ago, and my dad told me he has amassed a decent sum of money which he put away to pass on. He regularly shows me the figures and where it's saved so, as he says, if he dies I can access it.
He need his prostate coring and for over a year has had a catheter while he waits for the NHS op. I have urged him to dip into his blinking billions and go privately, but he refuses to spend any. So he regularly has medical emergencies and I have to travel late at night sometimes to help out. His age and the catheter limiting his lifestyle has made him anxious in general so myself or my hubby need to go and see him almost every day. We have 2 teenage children, so we can go at short notice, but we were looking for houses near him and found one but we'd need a bigger mortgage and my hubby is nervous about taking on a big debt when he could lose his job if the hospitality industry doesn't recover enough.
He would like my dad's blessing and some reassurance that my dad would help financially if he was made redundant. My dad refuses, saying we need to batten down the hatches, that this money is to pass on to future generations. He says we shouldn't move because property prices may plummet and interest rates skyrocket and we'll be repossessed if DH loses his job and have to go into rented. So we are left with an almost daily hour long round trip to do jobs, bring supplies, etc. I'm really brassed off that this would be so much easier if we'd moved to be 5 mins away, but my hubby is scared to make the move when dad says no.
But it's going to get worse, not better and my dad, though I love him dearly is becoming more and more stubborn and demanding. Both my hubby and I work full time and the travel is eating into our lives. We don't mind the time with him at all - quite the reverse. He's our family and we love spending time with him, but it's the unnecessary daily travel I resent. What do you think?