I was on here about a year ago after my dad had a bad fall and broke 4 vertebrae.
To cut a long story short, although there was no spinal cord damage and we got him home after 7 weeks, he never really recovered and his health and wellbeing has been on a downward trajectory ever since.
Shortly after lockdown he became largely bedridden (other than going to the bathroom) due to weight loss and lack of strength/balance. Verdict of 2 x GPs and practice nurse is that it's likely he has some kind of late stage gastrointestinal cancer and a prognosis of a couple of months at best.
Over the last week has been struggling to get to the bathroom (he has a commode and portable urinals in his room.but I've had to hold him up to use the latter. Today he made it out to the loo but I had to lift him off it).
Mum seems to be somewhat in denial and is not really managing to make any decisions about equipment and carers, and emotionally is utterly exhausting.
I'm visiting them almost daily, sometimes for several hours or more than once, but feel I'm spending all my time propping mum up. I want to be supportive but I'm also trying to work from home, keep an eye on 15yo DD (who is great but starting to forget what I look like), keep my own home/paperwork under control and look after myself (which is frankly a lost cause).
I feel guilty as hell for both resenting Mums demands on my time and brain space, and also because I'm dealing with the dad aspect on autopilot and have barely cried or even begun to process the situation.
I imagine my mum's emotional demands will only get worse and feel like my life is basically going to be over for the foreseeable future. I'm terrified I'm going to have give up work and my home to care for her and although I love her dearly, we are like chalk and cheese and I just don't think I could cope.