Uncle has transferred money out of account!

[BonnesVacances]

I'm posting this for my DM. My 88yo DGM has dementia and moved into a care home near DM a number of months ago after a fall. She has a little nursing care but her dementia has greatly improved since she's been receiving regular medication and meals. It's not a dementia home.

Before then she lived alone and we all wanted her to move into a home as she couldn't look after herself. But now she's in the care home, DUncle is unhappy at how much it's costing. DU looks after DGM's money and is a named person on her accounts, as per DGM wishes.

Such is the case that now DM and DU have fallen out. He tried to secretly remove DGM from the care home to put her in a cheaper one but was stopped by the care home manager as DGM told her she wanted to stay where she was. There's some kind of order in place now that he's not allowed to even take her out for a coffee.

DGM's solicitor, doctor and care home manager are 100% happy she has capacity to make decisions. DU has requested several assessments claiming that DGM is not of sound mind, but she passes them all.

She has now given DM POA and asked for DU to be taken off the accounts. But they have discovered DU has recently transferred the balances to his wife (my aunt). We're talking six figures as DGM had enough to stay the home for 12 years.

I'm assuming it's not a police matter as he was an account holder, though it is definitely theft as it was DGM's money. I advised DM to speak to Age Concern or similar as I expect this kind of thing happens all the time, but not sure what else can be done?

There have been a few other upsets as he's taken some valuable items from her unoccupied flat, which DM has noted somewhere. And DGM can't remember what's in her Will but DU won't give her it to her, so her solicitor has recommended she draw up a new one. So it all sounds very dodgy.

Any advice/suggestions?

Yes absolutely what the others said. We had all kinds of trouble with my Brother who accuses me of financial abuse against my Mother ti Social Services. I absolutely wasn’t, he made it up to get his own way about something but it obviously was taken very seriously (I was totally exonerated).

His behaviour was so bad at one point that SS threatened him with the Court of Protection. What your Uncle has done is Deprivation of Assets and there are certain legal obligations you have as Attorney, pretty sure this will be taken very seriously.

Absolutely a police matter. He's a thief.

Contact the Office of the Public Guardian. That's what they're there for, to safeguard those who cannot control their own affairs. They have a page on their website for when you have concerns about the actions of an attorney. They also say contact your local police if a criminal offence has been committed, which from what you say it has - it's equivalent to a Treasurer of the PTA siphoning off funds into their account.

Here are contact details for the Office of Public Guardian
www.gov.uk/report-concern-about-attorney-deputy

I would speak to the police

What happened OP? Did you contact the police?

DM has contacted the Office of the Public Guardian to inform them and the banks have blocked DU's access to the bank accounts he hasn't cleared out. I don't think she's contacted the police, but the solicitor is writing to DU asking for the money back. DU is coming to visit DGM this week. He obviously doesn't feel he's done anything wrong to show his face!

When I said he might have thought he was protecting her money, I meant from DM who he feels has orchestrated DGM going into an expensive home to erode the inheritance (he needs his share more than DM). At first DGM was very agitated at the cost as she's naturally extremely tight and was still struggling to understand everything. But now she's happy with it as she has a better grip on things and is very comfortable there, so wants to stay.

Op you and your mum have my deepest sympathies. This is the last thing either of you need. Hope the police or solicitor sort it quickly for you.

Glad your mum has had his access stopped, hopefully he will transfer it back. It's a tricky situation if she wasn't happy about it in the first place. I guess the real tell will be when they see each other next and what he does from there.

It will be interesting to see how your DU responds when he is asked to return the money and that he has been blocked from the accounts!

Our experience has been that relatives don't get that the costs are high. That being said I do think you are being generous in your interpretation. It's your GM money and if she wanted to blow it all why shouldn't she? It's not his to safeguard.

Am so sorry that you and your DM are going through this. Hard enough with the family pulling together.

I really think your mum should go to the police 😮. What if Dgm got kicked out of the home.

Was it a joint account or did he have POA over her finances? If it was a joint account I'm not sure what can be done tbh but I hope there is something! Do you think he was trying to hide the money from your mother rather than your GM, OP?

Make sure that the solicitor writes to DU. It is so important to deal with this ‘on paper’ setting out why he has done the wrong thing and why the money must be returned. It should be addressed to the Uncle AND Aunt, noting that she has no reason to accept this money.

This exact situation happened to great aunt, he got 5 years in jail. It is very much a crime so definitely involve the police, so sorry

Another update. DGM's solicitor has received a letter from DU's solicitor contesting the POA (DU doesn't have this, he's joint account holder). He's also accusing DM of stealing DGM's money! We assume this is because he no longer has access to the remaining bank accounts and can't see it's still there.

Meanwhile, DU has been paying his solicitor out of DGM's account. So DGM is paying for two solicitors, hers and his, while they argue about her money!^^

Have you been to the police yet?

Horrendous. What's your solicitor say? I'd be tempted to contact the police now.

definitely call the police

Read your latest update OP.
Your poor DGM and DM, your DU is greedy little shit

Hopefully your grandmothers solicitor is now on to this but it sounds as if your Uncle was seeking full powers via the Court of Protection. In this instance your DGM would pay. It's fairly costly but we had to also do it. It's done like that to enable anyone to apply and not be put off by the cost in supporting someone. Your DGM would need to unable to manage their own affairs though.

This is so stressful! You poor things!

Definitely time for charges

Can you just contact him AND your aunt directly via email or text message so it’s all in writing saying that unless he replaces your GM’s money within 24hrs you’ll be contacting the police and reporting the theft?

I don't understand why you haven't contacted the police?

Police now