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Original poster

Teaching dd to read-help!

47 replies

Pawslikepaddington · 10/03/2009 10:48

Am wanting to help school teach dd to read, as she is just not "getting it". She loves to write, and recognises most letters so I can spell words out to her letter by letter (the super adventures of bertie botious the bear being yesterdays-I got stuck half way through!), but reading really upsets her, so I have taken to reading her reading books to her as bedtime stories. She enjoys this (we do a "proper" story afterwards) and occasionally joins in, but her reading diary at school just says "refused to read" repeatedly, i.e. in every entry. If she finds out she is "reading" she totally flips out. How can I show her she is old enough/clever enough/able enough to read? She is a bright little cookie, but seems to have some reading phobia I cannot get to the bottom of!

OP posts:

BCNS · 10/03/2009 11:10

How old is she??

maybe she could write a story, book, or instructions out for you and read it back. Maybe she could help in the kitchen and tell you the instructions on how to cook something simple.

online games or wii type games are good for hidden reading.

iwontbite · 10/03/2009 11:15

maybe she just isn't ready right now. I'dback right off, and let her take her time

Original poster

Pawslikepaddington · 10/03/2009 11:17

She is only reception, so it isn't a major issue, but I think they are starting to shout at her at school for refusing to read (or that is what I am getting in a roundabout manner). We have been making little books (that I find really hard to read as the letters are backwards/forwards/going round corners, all sorts), but dd can read them really well! Good idea with instructions-thanks BCNS

OP posts:

iwontbite · 10/03/2009 11:18

well if they're shouting at her I'm not surprised she doesn't want to do ti

AMumInScotland · 10/03/2009 11:19

Did it suddenly change at school? Maybe something happened to make her feel embarrassed, and she just needs to feel it's ok to not get it 100% right every time.

AMumInScotland · 10/03/2009 11:21

x-posts there! Well indeed, if they are shouting at her for not doing it, then no wonder she's scared and doesn't want to do it. I'd go in and talk to the teacher and find out what's happening.

BCNS · 10/03/2009 11:25

reception year is quite young really, tbh.. and IMO it's more about the sounds that the letters make and learning that reading is enjoyable.. the rest will come.

lots of praise when she reads or has a bash at it, and a relaxed ( not shouty) attitude will help hugely.

Reading is everywhere you look, so there are lots of opportunities to have a go and get confident.

Maybe have a chat with her teacher highlighting your concerns and see where they think the block started.

Original poster

Pawslikepaddington · 10/03/2009 11:27

Ok-will go in to school. The TA is very "lets get this done sensibly and quickly", and a lot of the children are quite scared of her, so I think she may have made a remark like "for goodness sake you should know this" or something, and it has really knocked her. My dad did the same this weekend-he couldn't understand why she couldn't read "Pat the dog likes the ball"-"come on, they are all tiny words dd-you must know this-your mother did-you can't honestly not read that!!". I hadn't asked him to read with her, it was nice that he did, but this needs doing S-L-O-W-L-Y!

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madrush · 10/03/2009 11:29

The things you are doing are exactly what she needs to learn to read/how books work/what reading's for etc.

Do the school have a phonics system in place? Where is she up to in that? My understanding is that it should go basic phonic sounds, then blends, then trying to read words, moving onto sentences.

My DD1 didn't like reading at home and I bit my lip and we didn't practice reading unless she wanted to, and in a few weeks she did again. I think she didn't want to read to me until she could do it well - she's very hard on herself . But putting pressure on my or you dds wouldn't fix it.

MollieO · 10/03/2009 11:30

Who says they are shouting? Maybe she needs to take a step back and do the books without words. Ds lost his confidence in reading and that is what the teacher did with him. Now he is reading a lot better although part of the loss of confidence was (imo) the dire choice of reading material he was given - very boring and no story.

seeker · 10/03/2009 11:31

I would back off COMPLETELY and tell the school to as well. Don't have anything to do with school books or writing or anything "school-y" at home and don't let anyone else either. Just read her tons and tons of stories, make sure (I'm sure there are) there are loads of books lying around everywhere. The try again in a couple of months time.

And DON"T put up with her being shouted at at school about this. If it's true, complain to the Head. She's in Reception - she's not supposed to be able to read yet!

MollieO · 10/03/2009 11:31

I wish my ds's TA was more like yours. She is too laid back and ds does better if he thinks he has to do something rather than being given a choice. He does better with his teacher as she makes him get on with it.

Original poster

Pawslikepaddington · 10/03/2009 11:34

Dd said that she won't read, as if she does she gets shouted at . Although her version of shouting is being told something is wrong! We have gone back to the touch and feel books from babyhood, which she really enjoys reading to her bears, and also we do the at home magic key books, and the ladybird ones. She loves the questions at the end of the magic key ones, so her comprehension is sound. So the mn consensus is just keep her in love with books and the rest will follow?

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Original poster

Pawslikepaddington · 10/03/2009 11:37

You guys are great-such wise ladies (and gentlemen if I have misread anyone's name-I always do that ).

She is a great TA, I love her, but she comes across as harsh to the lo's as she will shout/use a harsh tone to get them to tow the line, whereas the teacher never raises her voice (she is a fab teacher-she is one of those really natural ones that every child obeys through sheer adoration!).

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seeker · 10/03/2009 11:39

Absolutely. It's pretty unusual in real life (as opposed to mumsnet life) to be reading in Reception. My ds is very bright too (g and t for literacy) and he wasn't reading until year 1.

They all get there in the end. As I said, don't even ask her to read, just read to her. She'll be fine.

MollieO · 10/03/2009 11:49

When ds went through his refusing to read stage I would just read to him and then ask him for help on 'tricky' words. Fooled him into reading without him really realising and we have progressed on from there.

BCNS · 10/03/2009 11:57

DD in YR would spend lots of time pointing out blends in words around her. through this when reading to her at home she then would point out letters or blends in the book we were reading. I just went along with it.

I love the writing there own book stage.. even when it's back to front letters and squishy drawings and them telling you what it's about.. even when it's nothing to do with whats on the paper.

then things just clicked for dd, and letters and blends made words. then there was the day that I nearly feel over.. when dd told me a particular cleaning cloth was for 'furniture'.. I asked how did she know this.. she replied, " because it says so on the packet"!! rather indignatly. ( i wonder how long she had been looking at the packet and sounding out!)
DD is in Y1 now and it's all just fitted into place!
honestly relax and it will just come.

BCNS · 10/03/2009 11:58

( oops on typos and awful grammer.. really out to preview before posting)

Hotcrossbunny · 10/03/2009 12:23

Poor dd IMO reading should be fun and exciting, not something high pressured.

It sounds like you're doing the right thing, reading her school books to her means she is still 'in the process of reading' and she'll begin to want to read too when the work she's doing in class clicks. I used to read dd's book to her and then casually say 'maybe bear would like to hear that one later...' Sometimes it just went back in the bookbag, but other times (when she thought no-one was looking) she'd read it to her toys

Online games are great for reading practice.

Make sure she sees you reading for pleasure. I always have a book on the go and grab a few minutes to see what's happening next, and then tell dd why I wanted to read and how it made me feel. Could be a magazine, newspaper, even a cook book.

In a few months I'm sure her reading will have taken off and you wont be worrying Oh lastly, I'd put a positive comment in the record each time. 'We looked at this book together', 'enjoyed the story'. Doesn't even have to be about the book. Could be 'Dd helped me read the recipe for fairy cakes', 'dd noticed a 't' word on the cereal packet' etc etc.

HTH

Original poster

Pawslikepaddington · 10/03/2009 12:29

Oooh yay, I thought I was weird for doing that hotcross-that it was I do-with a glittery star sticker! She knows I read a lot (am studying too, so loads of text books around), but she never actively sees me doing it (unless I am reading mn posts!)-that is a v good idea! Think I may get her from after school club earlier too, as although it is a bit less study time, it is more time to actively do something together wrt (unknown to her) reading. Really want the grow your own drugs book from BBC2 as dd would love to make bath bombs etc, and we are making canneloni together tonight, so a few opportunities there already! You clever girlies, thank you!

OP posts:

Snowstorm · 10/03/2009 12:31

I agree with seeker - give it a break at home and don't push it, it'll come when she's ready and it probably won't be long, as long as she's not put off. I'd double check with the teacher regarding the whole shouting thing, but I'm guessing from what you've written, that that's just probably your child not liking to be corrected, which is rather vital at this stage.

All in all, she's only in Reception, next year they crank it up a bit, so let her enjoy what she can, when she can!!

seeker · 10/03/2009 12:33

I remember LONG before he could read - he could only just talk, ds used to identify my books and dp's books by their covers. Mine embossed and with pictures of shoes, dp's black with shadowy figures and jet streams!

Original poster

Pawslikepaddington · 10/03/2009 12:39

He He He seeker-that is ACE!

OP posts:

lazymumofteenagesons · 10/03/2009 16:15

My son would look away from the book as you held it in front of him. He could sound out the letters but could not blend them. I found reading games on the computer really useful - wordshark is an educational package for pcs which was expensive but great. Once he eventually got going and would actually look at the book, we read alternate words, then alternate pages, then alternate chapters. This was about 10 years ago, but I also found some board games from a shop in Muswell Hill in london called 'Teaching Trends' which helped with blending stuff like str and thr - they may have a website now. Although it was slow going,by the time he was 9 his reading age was off the scale ie.>16.

lazymumofteenagesons · 10/03/2009 16:17

I've found the link www.teachingtrends.co.uk

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