Teacher threw away my DDs bracelet and I'm cross about it - should I complain?

[conniedescending]

Title says it all really, she forgot to take her bracelet off yesterday and the teacher saw it and chucked it in the bin!!She only told me on the way to school this morning and teacher wasn't there to have a word with (was in a meeting apparently)

so should I ask her today or just seethe quietly?

I read this and think the teacher is entirely OTT I would definitely speak to the head about this BUT I wonder if you spoke to the caretaker or who is responsible for the emptying of the bins perhaps they could help you sift through and find the bracelet or better still you could retrieve it and take it for the teacher to 'help' you sift through?

I have never thrown pupils' personal property into the bin (except for certain items of PE kit), but I must admit, I find chucking things in the bin highly effective. My pupils know, for example, that anything downloaded from the internet and bypassing the brain gets both ripped up and chucked in the bin. They only have to do it once.

I have never thrown pupils' personal property into the bin (except for certain items of PE kit), but I must admit, I find chucking things in the bin highly effective. My pupils know, for example, that anything downloaded from the internet and bypassing the brain gets both ripped up and chucked in the bin. They only have to do it once.

ST - this child is 7yo and the OP has explained that the child is normally a compliant child who on this occasion forgot she was wearing the bracelet. I am finding it a bit weird that you think this an appropriate way of dealing with a minor transgression by a very young child.

I didn't say that I would throw a piece of tat in the bin, but how I would deal with related things.

I don't find the age particularly compelling. It's a bit of a slippery slope - OK at 7, OK at 8, not OK at 9... Surely it's either OK or not.

I would just prefer the parents to support the school, and if a child has something confiscated that they don't demand it back the same day. Where is the motive to follow the school rules?

Fortunately I teach in a school where there is not a lot of blurring of the rules. Everyone understands and transgressors know to take it on the chin with great sportsmanship.

But the OP is not complaining of the item having been confiscated- there is no evidence that she is not taking it on the chin or failing to support the school. She is complaining that the item has gone in the bin so presumably will be lost and not returned at the end of term or whenever confiscated items are returned.

Well, maybe I was not addressing the OPs post as much as I was the unanimous support.

Serious, the last thing you want to make an issue of is a piece of cheap plastic when the pupil was in the wrong in the first place.

Just chalk it up to a learning experience. If the parent jumps in demanding rights, what message is this giving to the child?

It wasn't a diamond encrusted 18 carat number - let sleeping dogs lie.

sorry but there's no excuse - when I was a teacher anything confiscated went straight into a named envelope to be returned to parents at the appointed time (depending on what it was) - no way ever is it acceptable to throw it in the bit even if it is 'a bit of tat'. And no, parents shouldn't support the school rules if they are crap. Being a teacher does not exempt you from being a human being first.

Although I am very supportive of the teachers and school that my DCs go to, I do expect them to behave fairly and with integrity and will quite reasonably point out when this line is crossed, as I consider it to have been in this case. Teachers and schools are part of an overall community, not above the normal rules of fair dealing in society.

If I felt that teachers were unable to differentiate their application of the rules based on a child's age and normal behaviour then my child would not stay at that school.

Chack in with the teacher and ask about it first, if it does appear again suggest a less hostile way to confiscate childrens items in future and make it clear you thought what she did was wrong and no example to set to young children. If it has gone for good, complain.

I'd be livid btw.

but you don't get it - cheap plastic or not it should not have been put in the bin by some self-important teacher who was having am mini-tantrum. Yes, she may have been sick and tired of confiscating jewellry that day but plastic or not, it doesn't go in the bin.

shit, scienceteacher before you dig yourself in any further - the OP further posted it was her childs Christmas present and the only thing she could afford - guessing you haven't read that bit.

Thought I'd tell you quick - cos you're usually so nice and reasonable

Whether the teacher threw the trinket in the bin or not is in the past. What is important is how to deal with it now.

Is it really worth taking on the school. Who will be the winners and losers?

If it happened to my child, I'd say tough - you know the school rules (and I do that with even my 6 year old). I would not intervene for something of no intrinsic value. If I felt sorry for the child, I would replace it, but would not pursue the original item.

You have to leave our priciples behind and weigh up the upsides and downsides.

Upside: you get your plastic back
Downside: you shatter relationships with the school and portray yourself as a precious family.

I guess I'm a bit more pragmatic.

More unpleasant than pragmatic.

Whatever

God scienceteacher, you are being too harsh here. And what's with the "intrinsic value" thing? It had value even if it didn't cost a lot.

No, she shouldn't have worn it. And I'm a bit that she forgot it (sorry cd). My 4 yo wore a bracelet to school today, and she knew full well what she was doing.

But she also came home with it in her pocket. You don't chuck it in the bin. Come on!

And I don't accept C&P assignments either. They are returned. Not sure how binning is more effective TBH.

Teacher or not I highly doubt she has the right to throw away a pupils personal possessions.

Surely this is less about how the OP supports the school and it's teachers and more about the fact her daughters teacher has confiscated a pupils personal property and thrown it in the bin. I find that quite shocking.

It was her Christmas present?

OK, so the teacher is 'fed up' of telling the girls about weraing jewellery to school. Fair enough. What about working in partnership with the parents? How difficult would it be to include a reminder to parents in the weekly newsletter? Just becuse the girls have been reminded, it places the onus solely on a 7 year old child. A 7 year old child who is likely to be absorbed in HSM, nintendo or whatever and in all probability remebering to removed a cherished xmas present not a top priority.

If the problem at the school is as bad as the teacher making out, then i feel it is the school's responsibility to communicate that to the parents. It would then pass some of the responsibility to the parents to rememer to check, should thier child forget. As the situation stands, what kind of lesson is the school actually teaching?

At DD's school they are forever reminding parents not to park in prohibited areas (a whole other thread, i know), but 'usefully' state "We noticed 44 cars parked on the zig zags last week. Please remember that we are noting the registration numbers and would n ot like to embarrass any parent by having to speak to them more formally. If this continues we will be obliged to ask the Council to send parking attendants to our school gates before and after school". I think a similar stance would have been appropriate in the scenario the OP has described.

They know where they stand with me

I am not advocating binning jewellery, but it did sound like the children were forewarned. My pupils wouldn't do this so it is not somthing I have to deal with - the most are those ghastly string things, and binning seems uncontroversial.

I do allow pupils to wear a kara, but will ask them to remove it if I feel that our activities warrant it - I never have problems with compliance.

As with downloaded assignments, I find binning very effective, probably because of the imagery involved. There is a chance that I read the situation wrong, but they have it on their memory sticks and with enough grovelling I can redeem the situation. Just handing back doesn't really get the message across. Trashing is very emotional.

jesus scienceteacher, thank god my kids do not go to your school.

Maybe if these teachers who are fond of binning personal property, spent more time teaching and less time looking for contraband, this kind of thing would not even be an issue.

oh and conniedescending I would cry too, know what you mean about the stocking fillers + level of effort + kids loving the contents etc...it is nowhere near 'just a bracelet'.

Hope you get it back.

I think that rather depends on the message you want to get across. The message my pupils get is that I don't accept C&P assignments. Not sure what message you're sending with your "emotional" trashing.

connie, how upsetting, I would be so I hope you get somewhere with the head and the teacher is made to apologise for her wrong actions. ST your not the teacher in question are you you seem to be sticking up for this bully