Help me decide which pre-prep/ prep to send ds to before I go mad!

[chipmunkswhereareyou]

Have posted other threads on this but on specific issues rather than asking for a general view. Now I need an overall view to help us decide which school to send ds to at 4+ once and for all before I go insane!! We are going round in circles in the chipmunk household.

Option 1:

• All boys
• Lovely school - seems to value the things we as a family find important
• 15 to 20 mins drive
• from 4+ to 13+ so on the upside ds wouldn't need to move schools for a while
• class size around 20

Option 2:

• mixed to 7+ and then all girls (for under 7's it's about a third boys, the remainder girls)
• nice little school
• only 5 mins drive or a cycle away (although scary London roads so not sure this would really work in reality!)
• ds would have to sit the 7+ to go elsewhere/ change schools
• class size around 15

Background info:

1. ds is not a boisterous boy and I think arguably would be happier with girls around than just boys so the usual benefits of all boys don't really apply.
2. we have pretty much ruled out the main local (cofE) state option on the grounds that the classes are big (30) and we are not Cof E and there's a lot of praying going on in there!
3. The schools we'd consider for 7+ are really quite far away and so even though with the local one we'd do well for 3 years with the journey, once he moved to a prep we'd be facing a 30 min journey each way. So short term gain, long term pain.
4. ds is quite sensitive and also a summer born so small class size seems a wise move. He is also quite bright it seems so needing to keep up academically with autumn born girls will not be a problem I imagine (emotionally and socially is another matter).

Erm if you can make sense of that and come out with a solution I'll be very impressed! I feel like tossing a bloody coin (a dreadful way to decide but we just are totally stuck).

Well still more into the idea of Option 1 (the all boys) but still apprehensive about the journey. I guess it could be a little rest for ds on the way home.

We are rubbish at getting up early in our house so the mornings will be tricky - earlier bedtimes all round.

Not 100% decided yet - got to decide by Thursday....

It's interesting isn't it Issy that they stop playing together so young. One of the things we don't like about Option 1 is that it's all boys but maybe that's not such a big issue if the two genders stop interacting much by year one anyway.

Of course in an ideal world I'd still prefer a mixed school but it's not really an option (without major compromises in other factors). Maybe we can make an extra effort to find a good mixed senior school and that will help.

Well I for one have decided on Option 1. Dh and ds are currently doing the journey by train (admittedly on a weekend so slightly different) to see how feasible taking the train occasionally would be.

I think dh has moved towards option 1 too.

Whilst we have of course made our own minds up, many of you on here have raised some thought-provoking points and made a big difference so thank you!

You may have made the decision already but I juist thought I sould add my persepctive as we are going through a very similar process with DS, 3.5, sounds very similar. Our options are slightly different but we have effectively gone for you option 1 - all boys, slightly further away, no need to do 7+. Largely on the basis that they "get" boys.

I wouldn't like to have to make the decision.

Can I just say although boys and girls tend not to play with each other after 6 or 7 they are still learning how to work together, seeing things from an 'alien' point of view, learning how to compromise etc. After all most of them will have to do this later on in life!

Having said that I don't think option 2 is ideal being in essence a girl's school.

The C of E school - do you actually know it's a 'praying' school? If it is the only state school in the area it may be no different to non-denominational schools.

Well we decided on Option 1 - the boys school. Thank you to everyone for your input.

Wheresthehamster - ds is at the nursery attached to the school and there's a lot of praying in there. It's not just that though - I had other concerns.
We are going to make a conscious effort to have him keep in touch with his girl friends and also hope to find a co-ed senior school.

Just catching up with this thread. Which school did your ds prefer? My then 3 yr old had very strong ideas about which school he preferred. Fortunately it was the one I liked too. I know someone who moved their ds at 4 from a school where he would have had to move at 7 - she thought it would be too disruptive moving at that age. He is now at a school that he can stay at until 18. That is like my ds's school although I would probably move him at 11 if he passes the 11+ or is bright enough to get a scholarship to a good public school.