Daughter unable to attend her graduation ceremony as it is full. Advice please

[mildlyfried]

My daughter has just finished a three year Bsc (hons) at a major University. She has been advised that she cannot attend her graduation ceremony as it is full and she is on a waiting list. All the other ceremonies are at capacity too. She has been told that if a place does not become available then she can either try to graduate in November without her friends or have her certificate posted to her for a £10 fee.

To say we are upset and disappointed is an understatement. Has anyone ever heard of this before? I did not think a University would do this and would make sure they had enough graduation days/dates for all their students. The students have paid tens of thousands in fees and slogged for three years to be denied the chance to get their degree in a ceremony with their family watching.

Is there anyone out there with any advice? maybe someone who works at a University? I'm tempted to go to the local paper and tell the story so other students know what to expect at this University. Students should be told when they are choosing the University that they are not guaranteed a graduation.

Thanks for reading

Unless only selected students recieve the relevant emails, then the process is fair and equitable across all students. I can just see a student at a post grad job interview explaining that, yes their grades were good enough to be
offered a place at the best uni/on best course for their intended career but they went for a lower ranking course because mummy was upset that they might not get to graduate with their friends if they didn’t respond promptly to the booking emails. Not.

I’d hope your children and friends would find your position on this to be utterly ridiculous, treat it with the disdain it deserves, and chose their university based on course content, prestige, teaching quality and facilities.

Suspect this poster is actually either the OP or a friend of the OP since most people wouldn't be quite so invested in a process which is common in very many universities. The OP's daughter might not have been in a ceremony at the same time as her friend even if she had submitted the application earlier.

The OP literally said she was going to try to discredit the university.

I think just a poster who has seen this thread as a full time job for the last couple of days!!

What a very silly OP!!!

Tbh I worry about OP’s daughter. My DC would be utterly mortified that their admin oversight has been broadcast all over social media in a manner that may make them identifiable and which has opened them up to mockery.

And then to have your mum considering complaining…!!

This is an adult woman who ignored an unambiguous email.

I bet her friends aren’t surprised she was lax in responding

My DS (18) is going to Lancaster in September (pending A-level results). I showed the opening post of this thread to him and told him the university concerned was Lancaster and asked what he thinks.

His first comment was "Mumsnet is so cringe" and his second was "She should have booked earlier". I asked if it would put him off going to Lancaster if he hadn't already firmed and I got a very incredulous 'no' in response.

It's fairly irrelevant to the students whether it comes from their tuition fees. They feel that they paid the university a lot of money and will complain about things like this. It's the sort of thing that could potentially effect university score in student satisfaction surveys (even if it shouldn't).

Yes I thought that too…

I think she might be the OP’s daughter.

She has the same ability to ignore information and then deny it exists.

What about advising your children to read emails when they are sent and then to respond to them?
This is a useful skill for life and more appropriate.

It may be more because it says something about the university and their attitude towards their students, rather than the specific practicalities of this one ceremony.

It’s not about a select few being allowed to graduate and
It’s not about treating people differently

It’s about being pro active. The more pro active you are the more likely you’ll get your first choice

Too late then it’s your second choice
Everyone gets a chance to attend a ceremony in the end

Exactly. The fact that they have expanded to the extent that not all students can attend the graduation ceremonies in July anymore and they haven't bothered to work around that says a lot about their attitude.

Ops child did respond by the deadline though. That should be enough.

You know full well that the OPs child (you ?) didn’t respond to the email asking if she wanted to attend graduation. You also know that graduation ceremonies were based on the response to that email.

However that doesn’t suit your narrative of the mean and nasty university not caring.

OP said her child responded by the deadline and as i said that should be enough. I am not OP or her child so stop being so childish.

@BurntBroccoli you’re arguing with your shadow. I don’t agree, let it go.

I think it shows the university are treating their students like adults and preparing them for the outside world. It's a shame that the OP doesn't do the same. If my DD did what the OP's DD had done I'd be cross with HER not the uni. But I don't think she would because I've brought her up to take responsibility for her actions. It's all part of growing up isn't it, screwing up, taking the consequences and not laying the blame on others.

What utter rubbish. I work with loads if deadlines at work and if I am given a deadline, I ensure I meet the deadline (like OP's daughter did) - I don't worry that actually the deadline is just smoke and mirrors and I have to do it weeks/months before the deadline, otherwise I'm considered to be "late".

Most adults assume that the deadline they are given is the actual deadline. That's certainly how it has worked with every job I have ever had.

But we don't know that the deadline referred to concerned attendance of the student at the July event. Someone posted information saying that there was a deadline regarding guest tickets. It's quite possible that there was no hard deadline for students attending it, it was just closed when capacity was reached. Or if a massive amount of people applied early, presumably the uni would have put on extra sessions (I think less likely because the amount of people in a college doing certain courses must be relatively small so it makes sense for the small amount of people missing out to graduate in November).

A big problem here is that I am not convinced that the OP's DD has been honest with her mother and shown her all the emails and obviously the mother is someone who seems to believe that her child is someone who cannot possibly be to blame for the situation.

Well i am going on the university website and the fact that some posters whose DC were at lancaster university have also said that there are limited spaces for july ceremonies and that therefore some students have to wait until November. Given they seem to think this is fine, why would they lie?

But the site does not give an actual dated deadline that I can see. We don't know if the deadline was in one of the emails sent out. If I remember the FB page correctly, the OP's DD applied around 3 weeks ago roughly mid to late May, a while after the
graduation schedule went online after numbers were confirmed.

Someone upthread that their DS received about half a dozen emails about it, it's quite possible that the DD was getting emails effectively saying 'ffs can you please let us know what you're intending to do?'

We don't know what was in the emails and it's quite possible that the OP doesn't either.

But why should graduation be limited. It should be an integral part of the course that the student has paid for.