UK teachers report rise in problem parents

[Tabitha005]

Rude and disrespectful parents were a big issue when I worked in education ten years ago and, from this article, it seems to be an increasing concern.

Who’d be a teacher, eh? The shit they have to put up with is awful.

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2026/mar/13/teachers-mental-heath-parents-behaviour-education

@HarshbutTrue2 most of those doing A levels will have academic study as their goal. And more fool you if you did things you shouldn’t have with coursework. Better to be in a bit of internal trouble (not that anywhere I’ve ever worked has pushed cheating) than be struck off if discovered by the exam board…

What if a teacher is favouring their own child in class, thus massively demotivating everyone else?

What CPD they would need? :)

If you are unhappy with a teacher, make an appointment with the Head to discuss it and request a class move if that’s possible. Most heads will accommodate it if they can. I’ve known lots of teachers who teach in their child's school (rural area, few choices) but they’ve all done their best to avoid teaching their own child and, if they have had, to eg in a subject with only one group at GCSE or A level, they have tended to err the other way and be harsher on their own child.

That’s not a CPD need, it’s a disciplinary matter that should go through the Head (and be raised suitably objectively with the Head, with appropriate evidence). A good Head would raise it in a professional conversation with the teacher in question, set timely and measurable objectives for improvement, and review the school policy on parents teaching their own children.

I haave in some cases mad vry gentle suggestions in these meetings around strategies to help with the DC's behaviour and been looked at as if I suggested they sprout wings and fly
In one case I suggested maybe their 8 year old would be able to cope better at school if they actuaally went to bed instead of falling asleep around 2am on the sofa playing with their X Box to be told "oh no, I don't think he would want to do that"

It's an interesting point of view. So your instant response is for the child to suffer further disruption to their education, move classes etc... in other words, your first solution is to inflict more harm on the victim 🤔

The only thing is the whole class would have needed to move somewhere else 😁

A good Head would never allow the conflict of interests, obviously. It was pointless to complain.

Not that the parents "challenged" that teacher in any way. They were afraid of consequences for their children, also quite obviously.

I can see the situation from both sides.
As a teacher with 30+ years I have seen a rapid deterioration in pupil and parental behaviour over the last 20 years - but that's not all parents and kids which seems to have been forgotten here.
Unfortunately, a very disruptive and vocal minority of pupils and parents demand " their rights" at every opportunity. These pupils play their parents along, drip- feeding exaggerated tales of woe until they trigger the desired response where mum/ dad sets off in riotous indignation to scream abuse at the teacher.
Meanwhile " little Johnnie" gets away with whatever they have done whilst the parent and spineless SLT circle each other spitting abuse and platitudes.
Later, the SLT will either bully the teacher into thinking they are the problem or, if they know the teacher will stand up to them, quietly move the pupil to another group hoping the problem has now gone away.
As the silent majority of parents never say anything, because they don't think they can comment on named individuals, the problems persist even if they are moved elsewhere.
The result is that teachers with masses of experience, excellent classroom management and a proven record of above average progress scores at GCSE and A level really can't be bothered anymore and have left the profession in droves. The replacements often have little or no experience and unfortunately have no really experienced mentors to learn from( because we have all retired or left)
So ultimately the unresolved poor behaviour of the few is having a massive impact on the whole school population

I don't work in education, OP, and I completely agree. I cringe at the mumsnet posts and the way people think it's okay to speak to teachers. That and the total lack of parenting - it's just awful. Teachers are so much less respected in the UK than in Europe. The pay has stagnated and the conditions have worsened so much.

The usual procedure if you have an issue with the Head (or if a problem raised with the Head is not resolved) is to escalate the issue to the Chair of Governors.

It is very difficult to resolve an issue that is never raised, and to an extent, nobody can be blamed for not solving a problem nobody mentioned. As a pp said, most teachers who are parents will actively seek to avoid teaching their child as perceived unfairness (pro or anti) is very hard to avoid.

Well that’s not the case at all, is it?
You've misinterpreted everything I’ve said to make it the worst it can possibly be - I was trying to offer a way you could address it without being abusive, which is what this thread is about.
No point in further discussion with you on this I don’t think.

...and if parents did raise it, they would have been lambasted on threads like this for being bloody troublemakers "challenging" poor saint teachers :)

The Head was made to resign a long time ago, that was just an example of another side of the medal. Children definitely became more cynical too early but maybe it's part of teaching at schools...

Nobody - absolutely nobody - has suggested that parents should not raise genuine issues politely and reasonably through the appropriate channels.

If there was clear evidence that the teacher was grossly favouring their own child, then in the absence of a substantive Head )I think this us what you are saying was the case), then arranging a meeting to discuss the issue with whoever was deputising at that point, then the Chair of Governors if not resolved, was the correct procedure. If the discussion was objective, evidence based and polite, then absolutely nobody would ‘lambast’ anyone.

I'm just showing you how it looks from a parent's point of view and I wasn't being abusive. I cannot understand why a parent should agree to put their child through further disruption for the teacher's fault yet you think it's OK.

You definitely sound very confrontational, unlike @cantkeepawayforever who is also a teacher (?) but somehow can discuss this 🤷‍♀️

I think the current situation makes it more and more difficult for schools and teachers to discuss reasonably-raised concerns reasonably , though.

When 9 out of 10 - or more - parent / teacher interactions involve parents being unreasonable, impolite, abusive, accusatory etc, then school’s default initial manner may well become more defensive even towards those whose complaints are reasonable. It’s like expecting an abused spouse to be instantly loving and kindly when the abuser is, for once, polite and reasonable.

Where emotions are heightened, and may well have led to generalised anxiety / fear / overwhelm, it can be really hard to respond perfectly.

Do you think this is partly due to the fact that schools seem to expect so much engagement from parents these days? When I was a child you never saw parents in school except for assemblies. There were no WhatsApp groups/emails/letters etc. Parents dropped their kids off and picked them up.

Now, schools seem to want parents to constantly engage with them, but are then surprised when parents begin to have expectations related to that engagement. My friends do not seem to have a single week without something being required of them from school. One of my friends is having to take in jugs of juice to the school this week for an event as an example - this is a grown woman with a job and responsibilities!

I just don’t think schools can have it both ways: expecting constant engagement and interaction from parents but with no expectations is not realistic.

No, I meant the issue was in the past, the head allowed the conflict of interests to happen as they were friends with the teacher, lots of parents were aware of the favouritism but no one complained or moved their child as it would have only meant further problems and disruption for children, children grew demotivated and cynical, "why bother doing your best" etc. The head was eventually fired for various other reasons but the teacher is still there as far as I know.

Response to KatsPJs

It doesn't make the behaviour ok but I do wonder about this, like the boundaries have been blurred.

One thing I've also seen at lot at my kid's school is that low level behaviour problems are more likely to be brought to parents attention. It's usually the sort of stuff that back in the 90s would have just gotten you a bollocking from the teacher and then you moved on. I don't think my mum was spoken to unless it was either serious or it kept happening despite being told off.

Rough will always behave rough, there’s some incredibly scummy folks out there and their sense of entitlement is off the charts. They will often spawn mini me’s, passing on their intolerable behaviours.

A solid strong SLT with a bomb proof set of standards does help keep them at bay, unfortunately though it’s a societal shift and the numbers of this cohort seem to only increase.

I’m not seeing anything confrontational in my posts. Yours to me are less calm I think. I am discussing it. I’m just saying things you don’t like. I didn’t give moving as the only, or even the best, solution. Just as something you could do which wasn’t abusive. Because the thread is about parents being abusive to teachers. One or two people seem to want to make it about teachers being rubbish as usual though. Like I said. Best we stop now.

One of my friends is having to take in jugs of juice to the school this week for an event as an example - this is a grown woman with a job and responsibilities!

You mean she volunteered to. No school can demand a parent MUST bring things in or else! What do parents think schools will do if they say no? Give them detention?!

Exactly!!! This is what I always try to tell them, maths is in feeds, medicine ratios, crops, financial efficiency etc. or things like you’ll give an speech on your wedding day etc. also you know, you might change your mind!!!

Connected, however, when dd was at a state secondary, it was suggested that parents from other year groups volunteer to make tea for parents and staff of another year group. It was inappropriate evidently for a member of the SLT or the catering staff to do it because they had been at work already.

There was a complete tone deafness that mothers might also have been at work all day. There were always 2/3 SLT nattering at the side of the hall.

Entitlement can be huge in HE too. You get students who think that having paid their fees they can demand certain grades as "I'm paying your wages", "my money is keeping this place going" etc. Thankfully they are a minority and I also see that they view themselves as customers with rights now they are paying so much but wow.

By “volunteered” if you mean constantly badgering via emails and messages, using emotional manipulation and applying peer pressure then sure, volunteered. I remember reading a thread on here not long ago from a poster who was receiving messages from the head of her child’s school to remind her she hadn’t yet paid the “voluntary” yearly donation (I think circa £100+)!

Schools cannot expect additional emotional, financial and physical investment from parents without then those same parents having raised expectations in terms of levels of parental involvement. It’s a two way street.

Exactly. Women (and let’s face it-it’s predominantly women) are being called on yet again to provide additional labour to schools as a result of government de-investment. But then are being told to put up and shut up in return. I personally find it outrageous that once again women bear the brunt and are expected to do yet more unpaid labour for society. So yeah, if a school wanted my time, labour and money I would certainly be more demanding.