What to do with a bright child?

[Mumanddone]

I will be accused of bragging but I really am looking for genuine ideas here please.

4yo DD has started reception. She is in a private school. She can read fluently, writes and her maths skills are great. She is basically bilingual. She carries a conversation like a grown up - she’s hugely imaginative and great fun to talk to. She’s not some prodigy - she’s actually a bit of a silly little girl prone to not listening but she is objectively very very bright.

When I observe her peers, I don’t feel like they are on the same wavelength for the most part. Some of them are barely able to string a sentence together and they still seem to have very infantile form of expression. DD makes friends easily and is happy to play with anyone but at the same time - will this hold her back?

we decided for private school to boost her, but wondering if this is enough. I suppose there is a sliding scale to private education. Are there places better suited for her? Or is there something we should be doing to support her at home/ outside. She does the general run of clubs ie: drama, swimming etc.

Reading this thread, it seems many of these clever kids had really pushy parents (A* at 14 and sister the same way?) and are privileged enough to have parents who care enough to read to them repeatedly. I think thats probably what to do if you want an advanced kid . Install a love of reading and learning.

actually being surrounded by children with different abilities teach her great skills too

I can't speak for clever kids with pushy parents, because I don't think it was an issue in the early 1960s when I was pre-school age. None of my family on either side went to university but my GF was a very high-power technical engineer/design executive in the aerospace industry, who left school at 14. My DF joined the RN as an officer cadet in 1952. My DM and DMIL both left school at 17-ish and qualified as SRN/SRCNs in the 50s... not a degree in the family until I went. My parents and grandparents were not pushy, but they did push doing well at school.

Sadly I think OP has only heard the ‘teach your 4 year old chess and a musical instrument’ and ignored the 95% who speak from experience and say that other things - including social skills, humility and resilience are much more important.

OP - if you want your dc to do ‘well’ remember that it is soft skills and likeability that will serve her well in interviews. Loads of people have a string of top grades, not everyone is someone that people want to work with.

Number 1 predictor of success is your parents' wealth.

Ted talks are for those who will have to be slaving in their corporations so yes, they need to be taught grit is all that's important 😂

https://storytimechess.com We used this for chess

Wealthy parents can also lead to clogs to clogs in 3 generations.

How many additional languages does she speak?

You say you are not originally from the UK

Clogs to clogs in three generations has an echo of truth, but it's a bit too reductive. If you are innately smart and open to exploiting the opportunities you spot, regardless of your education qualification level, then you are likely to do well. It is about intelligence. Not suggesting that intelligence is enough on it's own, we all know clever clogs who failed at life.

It’s unusual but not impossible. My son’s nursery recognised that he loved books and reading and so spent time teaching him (and I reinforced at home). By the time he was in his last year at nursery, he was reading stories to the other children and by school was completely fluent. His sister on the other hand didn’t learn until she was nearly 6 despite the same efforts!

This is just your bubble. In super selective schools it's actually pretty common and nothing to write home about.

How many have you seen recently?

:)
www.telegraph.co.uk/money/wills/success-depends-on-wealthy-parents-not-hard-work/

Thats what we do, DD is quite ahead, we do a lot of sports, arts acting etc. if they are smart they will probably be fine academically anyway but they will most likely hit a wall at some point and will need the resilience to climb over it. We do extra work at home to keep her chugging along but otherwise it’s non academic extras. Oh she also liked storytime chess and ticket to ride and just card games really. Brightminds have a bunch of puzzles on amazon but DD completed them pretty quickly, it is fun though.

I can promise you I deem emotional intelligence more important than anything else. Personally, I don’t think we have a problem in this area though I’m sure many will tell me otherwise. DD is a lively, sociable and very content little girl. If I wanted any expertise on those subjects, I’d ask.

Your last sentence suggests otherwise op.

Keep an eye on how she does in the next few years and then decide if she'd be best served continuing at private or taking the 11+ and moving on to grammar.

We have a few local privates, only one of which is academic. We considered private but were ultimately glad DS went to grammar because he is suddenly surrounded by kids just like him and he is flourishing.

You have plenty of time to make a plan for her.

Have you tried a lampshade?

She sounds like all the autistic girls that I know, including my daughter.

Feed her interests. I’d recommend a prep school personally because they have very small class sizes and are highly personalised. I don’t know what your school is like but, yes, there are private schools and private schools.

That’s inaccurate.

Wealth isn’t a predictor of success. Parental attitudes to education show up at the greatest determinant of success in children closely followed by parental levels of education.

You can write a letter to Telegraph and convince them.

Do you think you have good emotional intelligence OP?

She is just foreign and not familiar with the usual MN passive-aggresive brigade :)

OP does she read in both languages? Is another language also European?