I was referring to a different poster and what she said. I know that's not always the case. I have found (in my experience personally and a few friends and anecdotes are obviously not facts) that it's the opposite. Teachers would randomly drop into conversation things they noticed, I'd be confused and ask them about it and they'd tell be not to do anything because I was smart (even though I was struggling in the classroom but lots of study and masking got be through bot completely though).
I also think more teachers and staff need to learn the signs for girls ans BAME students (who can present differently and often do), but staff lack the cultural competency to recognise the cultural nuances and not play into harmful microaggressions that I experienced as a 'strong Black women' and adultification in which they always saw me as more mature and we know this happens regularly to Black and BAME girls and impact their diagnosis for SEND, and they are often diagnosed later, as are girls in general.
I'm not discounting your experience btw, you're probably right - we just have different experiences. I think perhaps for autism (don't have much experience of this) they may prioritise those who can do well academically but you don't know if in other areas their autism is affecting them very badly and they still need acess to those services. There is a useful conversation as to whether at that stage the school should pass on to GP's and focus on those who have academic concerns but don't ignore those who likely have SEN but aren't (or aren't yet) academically too affected as they still go through the process. That didn't happen at all with me and many people I know. I've seen this more with dyslexia, dyspraxia, ADHD and auditory processing issues.