Pros and Cons of all-girls schools

[ANightingaleSang]

Just that really. I went to a bog-standard mixed state school and so have no experience to draw on. What are people's thoughts and experiences with all-girls schools? Thank you!

Don't be, a lot of it was not going to set you up to be a chef. We learned useful things like how to starch a shirt and hand wash clothes.

We did do a lot of cooking but it was 500 ways to cook mince.

The only useful thing I learned in 3 years was how to chop an onion.

I learned how to make Melba toast.

Yes I know it wouldn't have meant a huge amount career wise but my point was that they tried too hard to embrace feminism and they actually took it too far...

Not sure they did. My ability to cook is not connected in any way to the few lessons I did. Doing textiles gave me a lifelong fear of threading a seeing machine. I could have made far more use of the time in other ways.

I went to three all girls school and dd goes to an all girls secondary.

I think it allows girls to get on with their work and not be distracted by raging hormones and arguably pointless romantic relationships.

It's not perfect and there are some disadvantages perhaps but I think it suits dd 100%.

The girls are by default the best at everything and that's great for their confidence IMO.

I think it would have been great for me too if the first two schools hadn't been educationally huge steaming piles of incompetence.

My last school was great but it was too late.

I posted a few days back on my experience with two dds. I forgot to add that sports in an all girls environment is very competitive as there are so many more girls. Unless you are in the ‘A’ or ‘B’ teams there are very few opportunities in sport in our experience. These teams are also formed from a young age and although the odd team change happens , overall it doesn’t move. The games lessons of the girls that aren’t in the competitive teams are usually covered by a non pe teacher, whoever has a free lesson. I have also found that there is little want to improve these girls so they become bored and as they get older have little interest in PE. This is such a shame as there are so many other ways to keep active rather than netball, cricket, hockey. I hope this isn’t the case in every all girl school.

I think that depends a lot on the school. We got to try lots of different sports, partly because the local sports centre was on the same site. So as well as gymnastics, hockey, netball, tennis, swimming, cross country and track & field athletics, we also got trampolining, volleyball, aerobics, weights machines in the gym...

Those who were competitive were mostly in external clubs - swimming, athletics, running, tennis. We competed against other schools in team sports (hockey, netball, rounders) but not so much else.

I'd imagine as I've only attended girls secondary..

The positives-
Lack of sexist bullying

Lack of sexual assault or threat of such

Easier to concentrate in class as you're less likely to be in the presence of someone you fancy (assuming you're straight)

Negatives-
Encouraging of unhealthy competition around dieting/clothes/physical appearance

Psychological bullying more than physical

Girls might not be as comfortable around boys as not so used to them

You may then be more likely to have poorer judgment when choosing your first sexual partner/s.

You get more bored as there's no one to fancy or flirt with (again, assuming hetero)

Went to an all girls school and on to college but found boys difficult to relate to as they were very immature and I found their straightforwardness and banter difficult to process . To this day I struggle being around men .

I went to a girls school and have mixed feelings. On the one hand, yes we weren't held back by boys in maths and sciences but I also didnt learn how to talk to boys, though I have brothers.

Also this was inthe70s/80s and we weren't 9ffered "boys" subjects, back then they would've been TD, woodwork and metalwork, nor boys sports such as football. But I'm sure that's changed.

If you do go down the girls school route, I recommend you encourage your daughter to attend out of school activities that involve boys, Scouts, sports, drama, whatever. Just so they're more confident socially than I was around them.

The thing about the whole 'girls as a defaut' being good for feminism only takes you so far. Yes, girls learn that they can be anything, when they're the default - but they're only seeing that in situations where there is no boy available. And for every girls' school there is a boys' school - in which boys are seeing boys as the default, and where they have no opportunity to see girls being brilliant at sport and STEM. Yes, their assumptions might be challenged once they emerge into university and meet such girls, but those ingrained perceptions that they've picked up at school are hard to shake. In the history of feminism, I think female-only spaces have been hugely important in breaking the mold initially - for example in the early 20th century with women's only Oxbridge colleges and female intellectual societies. But those female-only spaces still ultimately 'other' women - and I think equality will only really be achieved once women have equality within a shared space. (It's also interesting that single sex schools are very unusual in the rest of Europe - this is a very British debate.)

The plus for DD having been educated in an all girls environment until 18 was that, by University, she had the self confidence to stand up for herself and not let her male colleagues dominate.

I'm not sure she would have managed this at 11, or even 16.

@BobbyBiscuits Girls in co Ed want to be good looking for the boys! It’s not just about impressing your girl peers. In addition, girls can be ogled by boys and upskirted. Even given scored for looks and given unflattering nicknames. It’s not true to say there’s more eating disorders in girls schools and it’s a MH condition. It ca happen in any school environment.

@TizerorFizz I don't disagree with that at all.

Ultimately these threads tend to be fairly evenly balanced between those who are fans of single-sex education and those who aren't, often based on their own experiences. Which leaves us with deciding what is best for your own DCs on a case-by-case basis. Some girls love to be in an all-girls environment and some do not; the best judge of this is going to be the parents, and more specifically the mother 😀

That was not my nor my two children's experience. Because they were together since very young they all went around in goth or tracksuits.

I spend a lot of time in and out of mixed secondary schools in a volunteer role and that isn't what I see at all.

School toilets in most schools I've seen are ceiling to floor doors now.

It also depends a lot on the individual school (whether state or private, single sex or mixed.) No one school is the right choice for every child, however good it might be on paper.

I am pleasantly surprised by all the really thoughtful responses. Thank you everyone for taking the time to respond.

A local mixed school has recently banned skirts and all girls are in trousers now due to the number of upsetting incidents.

That’s terrible . Punish the girls for boys behaviour

I know.

Its always the girls having to change their behaviour as the boys won't alter theirs. 🙁

At least girls are safe in girls’ schools. Why should they have to change what they wear because boys are not trusted?

How can you be a goth at school? Or how can you be with your sibling? I guess teachers and visitors are not aware of what is said to girls or about girls. It’s hardly going to be broadcast to to adults.

I am quite militant about people not telling my daughter that boys are just naughty and that’s that or that they are behaving badly around her because they like her. I’m determined that she grow up with boundaries and doesn’t excuse poor behaviour in her direction. She goes to a mixed school and for me spending those years well clear of the sort of crap she gets bred a far greater lack of tolerance in me. To the extent I often got branded no fun when younger but them’s the breaks.