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A short story, for the attention of Ms Reeves

141 replies

mrjsw · 25/09/2024 18:19

This story is about fishing, but of course fishing is just a metaphone. It is really about anything that you and your children are passionate about.

When my son first started learning to fish, he was at the local stream, using a piece of string on a stick. This was fine, and it was great for most of the other kids there because it was free and provided them with all the basics that they needed. Yet it was easy to see that my son was a very gifted angler from an early age and he was clearly frustrated with his progress. He wasn't getting the support from the people around him at the stream, plus the lack of proper fishing equipment was evidently affecting his ability to develop.

Luckily we became aware of an exam that he could take which could potentially open up access to a huge range of high class fishing spots all around the country. We were warned that it was a grueling process to break into this world of private fisheries and was likely to be extremely expensive. Nevertheless, our son was determined to give it a try because he understood that he could achieve so much more if given the right opportunities. He was only six at this point, and the exam would take up a good year of his childhood in extra study and preparation and he would be competing against kids from all over the world, most of whom had been preparing for this at private pre-fisheries since they were born.

As so we looked at our finances, long and hard. In order to give him a fighting chance at passing the exam we knew we had no choice but to pay for extra fishing lessons away from the stream, and to invest in some professional fishing equipment. There was no guarantee that he would pass the exam and it could all have been for nothing, but the passion our son showed made it all worthwhile.

A year later, our son sat the exam (there were actually many exams as each fishery had their own process). To our delight, through his hard work and sheer determination he did incredibly well. He was offered places at several different fisheries, fisheries with reputations as some of the best in the country! We were over the moon and our son was elated.

With the high of his success came the deep worry of how we would actually afford the place that our son had earned. The fishery he wanted to attend was ranked 3rd in the country and oh boy did they know it! The cost of attending made the expense of the past year pale in comparison. But there was no way we were going to give up now. Again we looked at our finances. We had no savings as we'd spent everything we had on the extra tuition and resources to ensure he could compete in the exam, and we had no family in a position to support us, having both grown up in much more humble conditions than we now found ourselves. With enough sacrifice though, and if I could secure the promotion I'd been working towards, we could just about make it work. It wouldn't be easy for any of us and life would be extremely tough, but if it meant our son could reach his full potential then everything would be worth it.

And so my son began his journey in this new world of elite fisheries, and he began to thrive. We found ourselves in a strange new land, surrounded by people with unimaginable wealth and opportunities at their disposal, but also by many other families like ourselves who were giving up everything to support their children and give them the opportunity to participate in this exciting and enriching environment.

At work, my colleagues were moving out of their starter flats, buying family homes with luxuries like gardens and second toilets, purchasing cars on finance, going on holiday (abroad!), surprising their wives with romantic weekend getaways and generally doing all the things that most people with a decent salary like mine take for granted. We, on the other hand, spent our evenings in our small apartment, sitting at the Ikea table combing through our expenses, looking for ways to save a few pounds here and there, cook more efficiently, mend old clothes, and worrying about how to afford the latest hike in the mortgage, the council tax, the electricity, the food shop, and so on.

But it didn't matter, because our son was not only thriving and becoming an excellent angler at the fishery, he was also learning about so much more than just fish. He was being exposed to so many new and fascinating opportunities. He had picked up musical instruments, he was a confident speaker and team player, he was learning new languages, and he was so far ahead of where he would have been at the local stream as to be unrecognisable. He was full of a sense of achievement and confidence, and above all he was happy.

And so we were happy too, despite the daily struggle to balance our finances and the constant bombardment from all sides by the ever increasing cost of living. We were happy that we could make things work, that my salary was just enough to cover our expenses, that we could still put food on the table and keep the meagre roof over our heads, and that we could watch our son grow and thrive and come home every day glowing with new knowledge.

And then the government decided that the children of families who work hard, save hard, and sacrifice everything do not deserve to attend these elite fisheries. That the likes of us should be forced to use the local stream along with everyone else who works for a living. That only the properly rich, those with trust funds and investments and property portfolios and generational wealth, those who don't have to work or save or sacrifice, only those kind of people should be allowed to send their children to these elite fisheries. Not us pretenders. Us who earn a salary. Us who pay the lions share of taxes. No, we should not be allowed to strive to better our children's future. After all, it was from these elite fisheries that most of the people in government came, and they didn't want to see us in with a chance at the kind of opportunities they had when growing up.

They realised that the money we had earned (and which the government had already taken 45% of before we even received it) was not being spent on "stuff" (that is, useless consumer items that people don't need), and so they were not getting their extra taxes when we spent our money, and it was not being saved so they could not get their extra taxes from our savings either. They realised that we were investing our money in something they couldn't tax (yet): education, knowledge, our children's future.

And so they changed the law and taxed the money that we invested in our children. But they didn't do this in a way that would allow us to adjust our life to meet this new onslaught of cost with careful planning, or time to get another promotion, to get a new job, get a second/third job, or whatever it took to meet this fresh demand for more money. No, they engineered it so that the likes of us would have no chance to attempt to meet this sudden, insurmountable financial burden. They said this new tax would be payable immediately. And to make sure that the fisheries couldn't soften the blow for their hard working families, they also hit the fisheries with many additional taxes at the same time. This ensured that the fisheries were forced to pass on the full burden of the education tax and had much less of the money they usually set aside to support struggling families through hard times. They had thought this one through with cunning and malicious intent, and there was no escape for the likes of us.

Our son, our bright, gifted son who is brimming with potential is nine years old and has made firm friends among his peers at the elite fishery that he worked so hard to get into, forming childhood bonds that should have lasted a lifetime. He is at the peak of his curiosity and educational awakening.

Yet now he has been ripped from this place that he earned through hard work and determination and talent and is back at the local stream. He doesn't understand why. He is confused and conflicted. He is angry. At us, at the world. His spirit has been crushed. His belief that with enough hard work he can achieve anything he puts his mind to has been destroyed. He is years ahead of his peers and he barely recognises the string on a stick that they expect him to catch fish with. He has no interest in what they have to teach him.

Our investment in his future, the money, the years of hardship, the sacrifices, his year of childhood lost to exam preparation, it was all for nothing. Worse than nothing in fact. We have not only lost those years of our lives, the time, the money, we have lost our happy, determined little boy. He is crushed. We have less than when we started in every single way.

With one cruel and spiteful swipe, the government has taken everything from us, just because we dared to believe in a better future for our child.

OP posts:
Ilovelurchers · 25/09/2024 20:36

Do you genuinely think that your son's situation is more worthy of comment/pity than children growing up in homes where there isn't enough money for food.

If your son is as intelligent as you say I have no doubt he can grasp what has happened, even if you can't.

I also can't see why he "lost a year of childhood" preparing for entrance exams? Most kids don't, so it was that much of a struggle for him, perhaps he will be better off somewhere else.

NewGreenDuck · 25/09/2024 20:41

I'm more concerned about the 2 child benefit cap. Homes that are in a poor state of repair, both privately rented and social housing. I'm more concerned about the state of the NHS. ( I have direct experience of the mess that is in) I'm concerned for families that can't afford to eat. About the numbers of kids and vulnerable people who will be sleeping in temporary accommodation tonight because there is a housing shortage. I could go on, but I'm sure you get the picture.

quantumbutterfly · 25/09/2024 20:51

Move to one of the areas that still have grammar schools, he's 9, with a bit of luck and a following wind the expensive prep will help him pass with flying colours and if you're lucky enough to have a local grammar he'll probably meet a lot of his old schoolmates there.

Kier Starmer went to a grammar school so he should appreciate your ambition for a better life for your son, of course his old grammar school is now fee paying about £8000/term without extras according to the website.

coronafiona · 25/09/2024 20:54

I am a firm believer that all children should have access to a high level of education that challenges, stimulates and interests them, no matter their abilities nor family circumstances. Investing in state education seems to me to be a good way of achieving this.

offyoujollywelltrot · 25/09/2024 20:58

Oh for GOD'S sake. 🙄

CabbagesAndCeilingWax · 25/09/2024 21:00

I'm a staunch supporter of independent schools, and I think this VAT will do great harm in limiting social mobility, and creating a even more elite top tier within society.

However, this is the most condescending mansplaining I have ever read. Your analogy of fishing doesn't add anything to your argument. We all understand the issue already, and don't need it "simplifying" through any form of laboured, fishy metaphor.

quantumbutterfly · 25/09/2024 21:02

coronafiona · 25/09/2024 20:54

I am a firm believer that all children should have access to a high level of education that challenges, stimulates and interests them, no matter their abilities nor family circumstances. Investing in state education seems to me to be a good way of achieving this.

It would be nice to see it well resourced but throwing money at it will not tackle behavioural issues that are driving teachers out of the profession or make people value the privilege of a 'free' education if they don't already.

PrimitivePerson · 25/09/2024 21:02

Well, let me tell you something...

My kids went to the local comp. My son has just graduated from uni with a first, and at his first ever interview landed a job that pays more than mine.

Quit the pretentious, self-pitying whining.

Razzledaz · 25/09/2024 21:03

Oh, give over.

Surely you realise that pretty much every parent wants the absolute best for their child(ren) and would make enormous sacrifices to ensure that they are prioritised? But, even allowing for missing a week away in Spain occasionally, the majority of the population cannot afford private school school fees. It doesn’t mean they’re sending their babies down t’ mines.

Also, a year of intense tutoring and examinations at 6 sounds, quite frankly, barbaric. Perhaps your young fisherman will enjoy clawing some of his childhood back?

I say this as someone who was state educated but has kids in private. I understand your frustration with the VAT policy. But, please, recognise your privilege and try and retain some perspective.

2k2j · 25/09/2024 21:20

PrimitivePerson · 25/09/2024 21:02

Well, let me tell you something...

My kids went to the local comp. My son has just graduated from uni with a first, and at his first ever interview landed a job that pays more than mine.

Quit the pretentious, self-pitying whining.

Not all comps are equal are they. It's ludicrous to say that one state school kid has the same opportunities as another. Some comps are great. Some are appalling. And the real inequality: parental involvement.

AnglerWrangler · 25/09/2024 21:32

Oh dear. My DS is an actual U18 international angler. What if people think I wrote this?

Seriously, @mrjsw I am sorry for your son's abrupt change of circumstances. Fwiw, I think it'll be an easier transition now when he's nine, than later when kids become more tribal and judgemental. If you have scope to do so, use the money previously devoted to school fees to buy a home in a decent catchment area and he'll be fine. There are lots of enrichment activities he can do to keep his intellectual fires stoked. You could alternatively save hard for the next four years and move him back into the Independent sector at 13 if you are still convinced it's necessary.
Honestly I feel your pain and am vehemently against the VAT on education policy. But getting lost in an extended metaphor depicting your child as too marvellously special to be educated with the hoi poloi wins no converts to the cause.

Anicecumberlandsausage · 25/09/2024 21:33

TL:DR, crappy fishing metaphor to describe how kids don't get the same opportunities at state school and that the VAT will take her precious son away from those opportunities.

No sympathy. Every child in this country can go to a state school, and if you can afford it, you can pay for the extra-curriculars for the end of the school day.

No parent has failed their child by not being able to afford private school. The insinuation is absolutely appalling.

AnglerWrangler · 25/09/2024 21:37

If it makes you feel any better, Labour would probably abolish fishing if given half a chance.

Sethera · 25/09/2024 21:54

offyoujollywelltrot · 25/09/2024 20:58

Oh for GOD'S sake. 🙄

Don't you mean, oh, for COD'S sake?

AmICrazyToEvenBother · 25/09/2024 21:57

Metaphone? My shit local comp taught me metaphors, at least!

Motheranddaughter · 25/09/2024 22:06

What a lot of shite OP
I want private schools with all their privilege abolished do no sympathy here

LivelyGoldOrca · 25/09/2024 22:16

The PP who said drivel is right, I was comprehensive but bright. Have done well. Sent our kids to private but switched them to grammar as costs so daft. Doing ok, as bright and both in great unis. A bright kid will do fine anywhere.

Dabralor · 25/09/2024 22:21

Oh ffs. What if he becomes a vegan? What happens then, eh?

Ginflinger · 25/09/2024 22:24

"His belief that with enough hard work he can achieve anything he puts his mind to has been destroyed."

This has always been wrong. Hard work plays a part, but what anyone achieves is always also based on so much else, including privilege. You've worked hard to send your child to private school and you've failed, because you don't have the wealth. It's disingenuous not to acknowledge this. It's how privilege works.

Biscuitsneeded · 25/09/2024 22:32

"When my son first started learning to fish, he was at the local stream, using a piece of string on a stick. This was fine, and it was great for most of the other kids there because it was free and provided them with all the basics that they needed"
Oh my heart bleeds. So the 'fine' local stream is OK for other people's kids but not yours. Read that again and see if you can grasp how this entitlement and assumption of superiority is everything that people, rightly or wrongly, dislike about private education.
I don't necessarily agree with the policy, but you are not winning anyone over with the argument that either our kids are not bright enough to warrant the same chances, or that we could afford it too if just made a few sacrifices. Most people would not be able to afford to educate privately no matter how much they scrimped and saved, because they just don't earn enough to pay for it. It sounds as if you didn't budget realistically, or the school you chose failed to plan and has elected to pass on the full 20% in one go. That's a you problem and a them problem - not really any concern of the 93% of us who would like to see our 'local streams' properly funded and resourced.

Autumnismyfavouritetimeofyear · 25/09/2024 22:53

Yawn. Fully support Labour. Parents need to stop moaning. Make the decision you can afford and stop whining about it.

MusicLife80 · 25/09/2024 22:56

Mate my kids are in independent schools, but wtaf is that load of shite!

itsmabeline · 25/09/2024 22:58

I was interested by the title, but then I saw the post read a sentence and counted the paragraphs.

17!

What are we, your thesis supervisors?

This is exceptionally long, whatever it is about. I'm pretty sure a post on Mumsnet is not the appropriate place for it. For a short story, you should go to a publisher.

Grmumpy · 25/09/2024 23:07

I don’t agree with the vat on private schools as the parents are already saving the state the cost of their child being in a state school. However I believe that private education promotes the mediocrity of some middle class children and we end up with dimwits in high places..Michael Fabricant comes to my mind but perhaps he was hiding his cleverness under his wig. We need the brightest people running our country, being our inventors scientists doctors and teachers etc, so I find your metaphor if the bright fisher boy unconvincing.

TitusMoan · 25/09/2024 23:07

Make a few sacrifices OP. I expect you can find the money from somewhere. Sell some of the fish, maybe?