Is helping with homework a new thing?

[LittleBiscuits]

Excuse me if this sounds ignorant but I only have preschool kids so haven't gone through this yet

I've recently seen on here various comments and other comments from colleagues about needing to devote a fair amount of time to helping kids with their homework as a standard part of parents' daily routine (I'm assuming primary school age to preteens/early teens).

But when I was younger (90s and early noughties) I never got help with my homework - I just got on with it. I'm not sure my friends did either. But from these comments I get the sense that it's normal to sit down with your kids and do their homework with them. Obviously I get that SEN kids (or really young kids) might benefit from additional support but otherwise I didn't really realise this was a thing. Am I wrong?

I was not raised in the UK so maybe that's the difference? Or possibly younger kids are just getting more homework now?

I listened to reading but never helped with homework

I used to get loads of homework from school in the 80s and dps didn't help and I didn't expect it

No homework for me in Primary and none for my children; the only time I helped with it was when my younger son asked for some assistance with an A Level Chemistry calculation. My older son was extremely resistant to homework, so I stopped worrying and left it for him to face the consequences. The girls were no bother, just got on with it. Grandchildren though had 'projects' . My heart would sink when my daughter would say, "Can you have H on Saturday? He's got a a project on Greeks, Romans, Tudors.....and you've plenty of books on it haven't you?

DC1 is in year 1 and has homework for the first time.

I think this year he will need me to sit him down and guide him through what to do. I'm hoping though once he's in the rhythm I won't have to help as much

I'm over 60 and can well remember my Dad helping me with my maths homework

I leave my secondary kids to it when it comes to homework but will help if they ask, which isn't often and is only for the sort of homework lower down the school where they have to make a model of a cell or a castle or volcano.

I think it depends on the school and the homework. Secondary no - unless they are revising and want testing on something. Primary it will depend. Most schools set reading, spellings and tables which need parental input to listen/test. There can also be quite a bit of "go on the internet and research" which can lead to interesting results if not supervised (most notable being research 6 facts about Henry VIII which led to several parents in DC's class being asked to explain what syphilis was - and no he probably didn't have it....). Mine also had a number of project type activities at weekends - eg document the steps to making your mother a cup of tea which might also require supervision. At other times homework was reading comprehension/maths worksheets etc. I got them to sit at the kitchen table to do them (so I knew work was happening) whilst I cooked their supper.

Not really. When they are small you need to dedicate time to both listening to them read and reading to them, just like you will do with your preschooler. They may need some help with projects, but infants level homework (apart from reading) is short and self explanatory- mine did it at the kitchen table whilst I prepared dinner. Once they are older, juniors/later in primary they may need a bit of input and help if they are struggling but mine mostly just got on with it at the table as before or on the computer. Secondary they managed their own homework unless they asked for help

Sometimes mine just need to be helped to remember that homework exists. I’ll also help if they get in a tangle with whatever IT system they need to use or if the printer’s playing up and that kind of thing. Some homeworks, like learning language vocabulary or other revision, it’s useful to have someone else to fire questions etc, so I’ll help with that if they ask me to.
They know I won’t do the work for them, but that I will help with whatever barriers are getting in the way of them doing the actual learning part of the task.

I'm over 60 and can well remember my Dad helping me with my maths homework

Same here. Maths, physics, chemistry etc. He wasn’t much help with Latin.

We strongly suspect that DS is dyslexic (pushing for an assessment at the moment) so he absolutely needs my help as he can’t read the instructions and needs me to spell out every word. Thankfully most of the time reading is the only homework.

@DreamingofItaly2023 you need to stop helping your DS or you will limit your chances of getting an assessment.

You need to let the teacher see how difficult it is for your DS to get the work done. If he can't read the instructions, send a note to that effect. If he can't spell, then let him send in work that is misspelled. You are not doing either DS or the teacher a favour by sending in work in DS' handwriting that you have basically dictated to him.

The basic function of homework is to provide feedback to a teacher wrt difficulty the student is encountering.

@LittleBiscuits didn’t get any help, but really wish I had, had learning problems and ended up avoiding homework, parents didn’t really notice- the lack of homework or the learning problems.

Yep, same here. I found it all a bit bamboozling when mine were in primary how invested so many parents were in kids homework. Mine is now in senior years in high school having got straight As in his Nat 5 exams so my neglectful parenting hasn’t held him back ;)

To add I probably got some supervision/help off my parents in the v early years of primary as I did with mine too and I’d help if they were stuck. My parents had no qualifications so by the time it got to high school they didn’t really have the education themselves to help much.

My parents didn't help me but I didn't get homework until year 6 and that was just times tables practice.

My daughter has got homework since she started school but I rarely have to help her, she doesn't get project type homework (like crafts or stuff) so doesn't really need parental input except for one time in preschool when she had to cut twigs off different trees in late winter/early spring and put them in a glass of water and watch the leaves start to bud and grow. Don't think the teacher would ever have known if she had done it or not but I was sceptical it would work so insisted we do it (and was pleasantly surprised!). She's never had to read out loud to me or anything like that, and spelling practice isn't a thing in Finnish, so the only time I have to help her with homework is if there's something in maths she doesn't quite understand.
But I do make sure she does her homework, at the dining table where I can see her doing it, and studies properly for tests. My parents never made sure I did my homework or studied and so I often didn't bother doing it, and it showed in my results.

I think part of it is also getting stuff to do on the laptop. Homework is posted on the laptop, along w sheets that might need to be printed etc. it makes it so you need to help kids until age 8-10 at least.

@Mamabear12
what if parents don’t have laptops and printers?

Schools shouldn’t do this really!

I assume they print for the kids that don’t have. It’s a state school and some things are out in homework book, but a lot of online stuff. I would rather it be old school and all in books like I grew up with!

@Mamabear12
I agree.

i noticed y6 for tables mentioned above. Surely that’s way too late. How can you access the curriculum if you don’t know them before that?

I think schools should have a clear homework policy and it should set out what homework is designed to achieve. When people say they’ve done nothing, does this include reading and writing? No maths at all? There is evidence that homework doesn’t make much difference to a primary child. First class teaching makes far more impact. Practicing concepts can be useful though. But: so can sport, music, drama etc after school. A rounded education is a better education.

I’ve never helped mine with homework, unless they were specifically stuck on something.

i do however know of several people who did their secondary school childrens coursework for them 🫤

I really suffered from a lack of parental input. I was at an outstanding primary and parental input was absolutely the norm. I am in my 50s.

We got 3-4 hours a week from 7 and 7-8 by 11.

I don’t see it solely as an isolated question of “helping with homework”. I take part in my kids’ learning and education - I engage with DS’s work and he does it when I’m around/cooking. Me engaging and taking an active role in his educating even beyond homework challenges him, excites him - he asks questions, I answer them - we extend the learning in ways beyond school.

i know others who take a “it’s school’s job not ours” approach. Each to their own.

I prefer our approach for various reasons.

I think if you can help your child early on that is great. It helps them. Especially with reading, writing etc. But as they get older they get more independent and can do more on their own. Tbh I think there should be no homework until 7/8 other then reading daily and math.

NRTFT but our homework for a 6yo this weekend was ridiculous.

Bake fairy cakes - needs significant supervision.
Spellings - can't do alone.
Complete learning profile - needs significant parental input.
TT rockstars - fine.
Reading - fine.

Meanwhile 8yo had to write a book review, spellings, rockstars & another learning profile. So less effort but still couldn't do some elements alone.

This is fairly standard.

Some weekends we do it all, sometimes we ignore it.