Anyone else find school sports day traumatic?

[Wishiwasonholiday11]

Just had school sports day. All quite nicely done with a range of events etc. Son in year 2 not particularly sporty, tries really hard, but just can’t run fast enough. He’s holding it together and putting a brave face on, but can tell (from the other side if the field) he’s upset.

Not helped by medal winning children (same ones winning most events!) flaunting medals.

I know it’s life, can’t be good at everything, need to celebrate successes and good for building resilience etc etc but just finding it hard to watch!

I couldn’t care less whether my DS wins anything at sports day and that seems to have rubbed off on him 😅 I’m proud of him whatever.

The primary schools my children have attended didn't do competitive sports days as such.

In infants sports day was more a chance to take part in a range of activities, and everyone got a medal for taking part and trying their best.

In juniors you could pick which event you wanted to take part in, so you could pick running or long jump if you were sporty, but could also pick a fun race like egg and spoon, 3 legged, sack race and it was more fun than competitive.

It was only in secondary when it became compulsory and truly competitive.

Not but I would imagine that in your everyday life there are some parts that are like pulling teeth that you would rather not do. There are plenty parts of my job that I deem to he boring, are not to my strengths and are difficult but I still need to do them.

If sports day is the worst thing you endured as a child, then you've had a pretty easy childhood tbh.

I was rubbish at sports day and hated it.
However I hate the idea of 'everyones a winner's even more. It is ridiculous giving kids a medal for just turning up. What does that teach them? You dont have to put any effort in to be rewarded.
I came last in every race. So did my kids. However we are not failures because we didnt win. 🤷‍♀️ We are good at different things.
Ds1 made a big deal, in a fun way, about being rubbish. Ds2 was " what did you expect?🤣🤣"
Your job is a parent is to alleviate the worry and build their resilience.

No, I never found it traumatic. My dc were both small for their age and neither are sporty. They were slow and a bit uncoordinated at sports day when they were at primary school. Their school encouraged everyone to see it as a fun event and there were other activities, not just running races. It just wasn't a big deal. They never seemed fussed about nit winning anything. They were good at other things in school.

kept dd1 off. She hated being humiliated in front of a baying crowd. She’s now a sporty hardworking teen so those “you need to teach children to do what they don’t like” crowd can fuck right off.

I suspect that the egg finds it traumatic but the spoon less so.

I remember when I was a kid, I could not care less for sports day as I thought it was a 'load of codswallop'

Think its better if kids don't feel a lack of self worth from it and focus on what they are good at. I remember doing cross country running ( during a PE lesson )with my hands in my pockets aged 14🤣🤣🤣🤣

Completely agree with you OP.

No one would expect a nervous child to stand up at the school play and do a song if they didn't think they couldn't sing; and yet sports day is compulsory

What they do learn is if you’re not a ‘winner’ you’re worthless. I long for the day they don’t put kids through this brutish, outdated ordeal. PE should be about health and well-being not rewarding children who just happen to be more grabby and physically able
Completely disagree with this as I said in my earlier post.
What's the point in everyone being a winner and getting a medal for running up for something that they were supposed to.
French lessons had me in sweats at school and I felt humiliated when I couldnt get the words out. I felt awful watching my friends able to have a classroom convo with the French teacher as part of the lesson. I dont think French lessons should be banned though.

Brutish outdated ordeal 🤣🤣🤣 ffs

We arrange our classes into groups so similar abilities are together to make it a fairer competition. We then do house points for the first, second and third winners and a whole house wins overall. No medals for individual children.

I don’t think humiliating children in front of a whole audience is necessary or helpful. Children will come to realise on their own that they’re not the best runners/jumpers/etc. I don’t need to be in a race with the world’s best to realise I’m a dreadful runner.

Charming.

Your kids must go to a tough school if it's a 'braying crowd'. As others have pointed out, are exams ritual humiliation? Are theatre productions, when everyone is given a part? Musical performances when you hit a wrong note?

I have three boys. One sporty, the other two are not. We still make sure that the two who are not close to winning races enjoy themselves and are given a great deal of praise for doing their best.

I'd but good money on the fact that most vocal critics of sports day would be the 'braying crowd' if their kids were winning.

Good Lord.

What schools are your kids at??

It's a few races, everyone cheers and then go home.

People have all these random excuses for why sports day is so super important but none of them make any sense.

Yes, I don't think it's super important, I just regard it as not a big deal (either positively or negatively).

I'm a secondary teacher and the lack of resilience in so many kids now is astonishing. I am only too well aware that some of them have genuine (and often very sad) reasons for this. But imo many have just learned that they can get out of doing virtually anything they don't fancy doing, by saying it causes them anxiety or makes them feel bad.

Children don't generally think competitiveness is 'decisive, ugly and unkind' (I presume the poster meant 'divisive'?). They compete voluntarily all the time over loads of things (in the playground, in the classroom, with their siblings).

It is, but not when you have to humiliate yourself in the process, forcefully.

it’s so bloody damaging.

Great if it doesn’t bother you didn’t bother my second child or me but my eldest hated it. So I let her stay off. Sports days are so visible. The other failures are private. Theatre music etc are done by certain children by choice. Compulsory sports day is hideous for the sensitive unsporty. The failure is so obvious and visible. Won’t force my child to take part to validate yours. Sorry not sorry.

I think having a range of activities as some pp have suggested is good. The kids could choose if they prefer a sack race or 100m sprint. I don’t like seeing the kid who’s trailing and in tears but also think those who love to race should be able to and be recognised for their skill. We recognise skill in all other areas in schools through drama performances, grades etc.

I think there are lots of other visible challenges kids have to go through- school plays, choirs etc. It just depends what your child finds challenging or excels at.

Keep your child off if they really don’t like it but ‘braying mobs’ and ‘Brutish ordeals’ is fecking ridiculous 😂

Kept my DS off for his first sports day last week (conveniently he had a hospital appointment but I could have easily rescheduled). He is 5 but has the emotional regulation of a 2 year old. He would have found it extremely upsetting, had a meltdown and gotten himself stressed and upset. Not worth it.

Why don’t you do something you are really shit at in front of the whole community? Go on. Resilience and all that

In another thread there was poster after poster recounting how upset they were most were forty plus! Shit way to encourage sport in the population!

Yeah ok 🙄