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Original poster

Divorced parents in TWO parents evenign appointments... has the world gone mad?

75 replies

HUNXXXX · 19/10/2007 09:22

chatting to teacher
at one priary school she owrked in out of a class of 30 she had 53 parents evenign appointments, where adults coudl not sit itn eh same room to discuss the welfare of their kid.

OP posts:
Original poster
HUNXXXX · 19/10/2007 09:24

.

OP posts:
claricebeansmum · 19/10/2007 09:25

That is absolutely ridiculous. Poor woman.

poptot · 19/10/2007 09:26

I have two very sensible divorced friends and they do this, cannot believe it, it is barking!!! One told me she couldn't bear to sit in the same room as him. daft thing is dh and I never go to a parents evening together it's either one or the other, can't believe the teachers put up with it.

alittleBITEshy · 19/10/2007 09:26

good lord! Poor children (and poor teacher obv)!

Surfermum · 19/10/2007 09:26

It was the only way dh could get to find out how dsd was getting on at school. He would have happily have gone along with his x but she refused.

Original poster
HUNXXXX · 19/10/2007 09:27

adn one parents( the class is a job share) is insiting on seeing BOth teachers )

OP posts:
alittleBITEshy · 19/10/2007 09:29

Surfermum - gosh i hadn't thought of that. I kind of jumped to the assumption that both parents were being difficult.
So sad though

Original poster
HUNXXXX · 19/10/2007 09:29

well apprenly some itmes they have justt he mum as the dad is awol...

OP posts:
nutcracker · 19/10/2007 09:30

Oh that was me and my parents, all through secondary school, even before they were actually divorced and mum had moved out. They simply would not go to parents evenings together and I hated having to get 2 appointments.

Xp comes to our kids ones unless he can't make it for whatever reason and then I just fill him in on whats happening.

WideWebWitch · 19/10/2007 09:31

oh fgs
ex dh and I go together

Surfermum · 19/10/2007 09:31

He had to get school reports and details of sports days etc sent separately. She told him that what happened when dsd was with her was nothing to do with him . He had to go to Court to get parental responsibility first (she refused to give it)and then the school agreed to send him stuff. Dreadful.

And he's a good egg, he hadn't done anything to warrant that.

WideWebWitch · 19/10/2007 09:31

But I am very happily divorced (it's incredibly amicable)

MascaraOHara · 19/10/2007 09:32

I can't believe people would make two appointments if both were that bothered about the kids welfare thay'd managed to bite their lip for the 10minutes they have to share air space.

Original poster
HUNXXXX · 19/10/2007 09:33

i think the teacher has an important roel here as head basher togetherere.

say " oi no you twats sort it out"

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Surfermum · 19/10/2007 09:34

In the early days he suggested they stood together at sports day so dsd wouldn't be upset/torn as to who to go and speak to. She told him "no way" and said that she was going to stand on the opposite side of the field and see who dsd ran to "and it will be me, as she loves me" .

Dh didn't even go that year as he didn't want to put dsd in that position .

nutcracker · 19/10/2007 09:34

My mum and dad haven't spoken for erm about 16 years now, not a word, oh unless dad answered the phone when mum rung and obviously he'd say hello, and then she'd say 'can i speak to nutty' and he'd just shout me or my brothers.

Totally nuts and screwed up but thats how it was.

Surfermum · 19/10/2007 09:35

But what can you do MO'H when one is refusing point blank? Better that dh had his own appointment than no go - and then be accused of a dad who doesn't care about his dd.

nutcracker · 19/10/2007 09:36

I think my mum and dad both cared about our welfare, they just put themselves and 'winning' above it.

It's ironic that they fought a nasty and lenghty custody battle over us but neither seemed to give a toss about our feelings once throughout the whole thing.

Original poster
HUNXXXX · 19/10/2007 09:44

thats i sad nuttola

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nutcracker · 19/10/2007 09:46

It is yeah but tbh I prefer it that way now and I think i'd have heart failiure if ever they came face to face again.

Didn't get the kids christened or get married because I didn't want them in the same room together. I don't think anything would happen, I'd just feel too stressed about it.

It can be hard, especially when it is my dc's birthdays as I have to arrange seperate visiting times for them, and my dad never drops in unannounced incase my mum is here.

Gobbledispook · 19/10/2007 09:47

My friend is gonig through divorce at the moment - it's nasty - obviously they have separate appointments (and I don't blame her tbh).

Original poster
HUNXXXX · 19/10/2007 09:47

what was the divorce over?
infidelity?

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Original poster
HUNXXXX · 19/10/2007 09:48

btu if half the class even did htat it d be 45 appointments

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Caroline1852 · 19/10/2007 09:50

My ex-DH never ever came to parents evenings when we were married. Anything to do with our two children was my responsiblity . However, not long after we split up he suddenly decided that he would attend ......with me. It was very amusing watching him introduce himself to my son's class teacher; she had been DS's teacher for the past 5 years. He only came to one and hasn't bothered since, probably because I always email him letting him know what time the appointment is, saying see you there.
It is unreasonable to expect to be seen separately.

Gobbledispook · 19/10/2007 09:50

He claims, but he's an A1 prize twunt.