Question for people (+ kids) with August birthdays

[RachelG]

Hi, I wondered if people could share their experiences with me.

I know I'm stressing about this too early, as DS is only just 2, but it's bothering me.

The local village school is changing it's policy, and is going to have just one intake (like rest of county) - each September. They are also stopping the previous policy of half-days for the first term.

So, my DS is due to start full-time school a couple of weeks after his 4th birthday. This seems very young to me, especially as he was 6 weeks prem, and is quite immature compared to his peers (eg eating, sleeping, speech etc).

I'm concerned that, unless his personality changes radically in the next 2 years, he won't be emotionally ready for these long days.

Legally I can hold him back for a year, but he would then go straight into "year 1", missing his reception year altogether, which kind of defeats the object.

I'd be interested to hear about other people (parents and children) who are August babies, what you did, whether you felt behind compared to peers, whether it affected you.

Thank you

I too have an August boy and he's been fine. He's now in year 2 and has only just turned 6 whilst another boy in his class is now 7.

You ds will be fine and between him, you and the teacher it will all be OK. yes you are allowed to be concerned, I was and I'm sure others here were as well especially whe you think when in the Jun/July they are only 3 and they are starting school in the September. Hopefully the biggest problem for you/him, will be finding school trousers small enough.

I was born on 26th August....only downside I ever felt was that my birthday parties were always in the school holidays . Academically I always held my own even when very young so don't think it matters too much. My mum says she did panic for a while though until she knew I was settled - we have been discussing lately because my DS started at pre-prep last week (and he's only 3!)

I was born on Aug 25th, haven't read all the thread so sorry if I repeat but I never really felt left behind at all. My best friend was an Oct birthday so nearly a year between us!

I only felt left out cause my birthday was always in summer hols so I never got to feel special at school cause it was my birthday!

my ds started half days at the school nursery the year before. It was really hard to fit in with work and other hildcare but think it has helpped him. I too was very worried that her would struggle nad felt him getting used to the setting and making friends would help him. Too early to tell if this has worked. Two boys in his class are 11 months older - that's a huge gap at 4 and the girls that are nearly 5 seem like teenagers in comparison!

DS1 and DS3 both have August birthdays.

DS1 coped very well from the start, even though his closest friend at the time was 11 months older than him, and socially more advanced. He's 13 now, and still doing very well. (He was three weeks' early and should have been a September baby).

DS3 coped ok, but did go through and aggressive phase midway through the year. I don't know if this was due to his personality (he's very assertive anyway), if it was the mix of the children, or if it was due to struggling to cope - he didn't exhibit any other signs and coped with the work etc etc. He's now 9, is a grafter, and doing well.

DS2 is an October baby, and out of the three is the one who struggles most academically, although he's the most socially adept of the three.

DH and myself also have August birthdays (DH the 31st). Neither of us can remember any problems. I do know the intake was different but can't remember the details.

Just to say, I kept mine on half days until I thought they were ready. They don't legally have to start school until the term they are 5, so they can't MAKE you start full days. I would be amazed if the school wasn't prepared to negotiate on this one. But stick to your guns. The other thing I did was to give them the occasional Friday off. Not so often that the dcs realized I was doing it, but if they seemed particularly tired, or it was a particularly nice day I carried on doing this with dd u to and including year 6, and will continue to do it with ds, now in year 2.

Was thinking about this again earlier.
Had ds1 been a September baby in the end, I think we would have had serious problems with him this year. I can't imagine him just going to school now - he would have been so bored and frustrated.

please dont worry

the youngest girl in our year - aug - has been absolutely fine

now they are starting year one the age range is disappearing - some of the younger ones are better at reading than the older and they have friends across the age ranges

do your best to help with meeting the local kids eg preschool and i think that will help with confidence etc when time to start school!

my older sons birthday is mid-august. he is the second youngest in his year. he found reception hard (but he changed schools between nursery and reception which i think didnt help) although he didnt start till the jan as we have two intakes here. the reception teacher was convinced he had learning difficulties, which he doesnt - i think she completely ignored the fact that he was so much younger than most of the class

thats probably not helping but what i would say is away from scary reception teacher (!) he has blossomed. he has just started yr 5 and is now pretty much top of his class so being younger hasnt held him back so far.

from my experience reception can be hard i think because they are so young, but after that things should sort themselves out, and you then just have the problem of organising brthday parties in the school hols (we now have ours in sept to avoid the ' all my friends are on holiday' problem!)

DD2 has her birthday on the 28th August and so started full time school within a week of turning 4.

I think you just have to remember that the long days will be tiring and that tears will come for seemingly no good reason. Just meet him at school with a snack, a drink and a big hug.

DD2 is catching up now... Y5 and sometimes it's hard for her to be a year younger than most of her class but she's getting there and having a lovely time.

sorry for not reading whole thread and pos repeating... and your fears may already be allayed but,

wanted to post that as an end of july bday i was almost always the youngest in the class, but was always well ahead of them. as such i was allowed to coast without actually doing any work which kind of screwedme up later - but i think all parents should watch out for that. point it; dont worry about the age thing, tho i undertsna the worry.

2years is along time in a 4yr life - lots will happen between now and then. and if you are uneasy w FT, insist on PT for abit.

good point mars... a snack at pickup time is essential for ds2 (hes in nursery class of the school)

Rachel - one of the first questions is are there surplus spaces at your local village school? i.e. if you hold him back will there be a space for him in yr1?

If there will be a space for him, it is possible and it can work:

DS1 has a mid-July birthday and due to a house move/change in Counties/school entry policies he started school in a new County straight into yr1 with a class of children who'd all done a year of reception together.

(And reception education/curriculum now is actually less 'academic' and formal and structured than it was then. They'd done loads of writing, letter formation, sitting quietly on the carpet, etc. DS1 had been to a very informal nursery with a huge outdoor space, where they basically had free choice all the time as to what they did and where - i.e. very play-based learning, just 2.5 hrs per day. No phonics, writing, letter formation, reading, anything like that at all. DS1 did learn to read at home though quite young. In preparation for school I also taught him correct letter formation over the summer, but he'd done very little 'writing'.)

When he started into yr1 we had a very bouncy ride for the first term, particularly the first month or so. He was not used to the routines of school, the huge numbers of children (c.180 on his playground), nor the 'compliance' required in a school setting.

But once he settled in he did fantastically. By Christmas his teacher told me he was consistently writing far more than any other child in the class for any exercise ... [possibly because other children had been forced to write too early before they were ready and had already got fed up?]

Anyway he is now a strapping 10-yr-old, and has always been top of his year for all 'academic' subjects. Now clearly that was his potential, and not every child who defers school til 5 will achieve that. But what I'm saying is I don't see that he could have achieved any better/higher had he done his reception year.

Having said that ds2 is a May birthday and he did reception and is doing very well at school. And top of his class is a little girl who had an August birthday and was born about 3 months premature!

Sorry that was so long, take from it what you will!

my ds2 birthday is 27 aug,he seems very young and struggles with everything.has just started year1 and youngest again he has speech problems and seems to be finding it difficult to fit into new class with diffrent children really wish could have kept him back a year .in reception his teacher said he was really behind and bottom of his class[not nice teacher]he was also youngest in class but this diddnt seem to matter.my twin ds are 1st sept so will be 5 when they go think this will make all the diffrence.

DS is August b'day - and he was born early. Until year 2 he seemed very young, smaller and more babyish than many of the others, although he didn't mind. He has just done year 4 and he won the prize for the cleverest person in the year (quick boast, sorry!). But my point is is that it does seem to even out in the juniors, and in fact some of the older ones have a bit of a comedown as they cease to be the biggest and best.
DD is August 30 (premature too) and she has just started school. I was really worried about her, but she does mornings only, and I know that it is important to be in at the start of things, making friends, getting to know the procedure etc etc.
Of course it's advantageous to have an Autumn birthday, it does make things initially easier - but, hey, someone's got to be the youngest in the school year, and of all the challenges in life, it's by no means the most difficult.

I was an August baby. Started after christmas. Never had any problems. DD2 also an August baby ... she'll do part time for first term. Don't anticipate any probs with her either

DD1 was 4 on 29th August & started full time school the next day.She loves it.However,it is a little village school,with less than 80 pupils,there are only 9 of them in reception & she knows everyone because she attended the pre school attached to the school for 2 years before.She does full days as I thought it would be unfair to take her out at lunchtime,when all her friends are staying & having fun.

But-if it had been a big,unfamiliar school,I would have kept her back until she was 5.She seems ahead of some of the older children in some things,so I think it depends on the individual.

Since your child was born 6 weeks prem, Rachel, you have a strong case for delayed entry. Our local school DID allow this -- well, actually, the lad (also born prem) went into reception as scheduled from his actual birthdate, but he struggled so badly they actually let him repeat reception.

I would approach the school and LEA now to see how you go about getting it written on paper and in legalese for a year delay start to reception 3 and not 2 years from now.

It seems a bit harsh that they won't let him do half days. Full days at school are a bit much for someone who's just turned 4.
DS1's birthday is middle of August so he started reception only a month after he'd turned four. But the school staggered the intake over the first three weeks of term, with the youngest starting latest, and he was only on half days for the first term, with the option of half days in the spring term too.
We chose for him to go full-time after Christmas, as the rest of the class were, and, much as he loved school, he found it very tiring at first.
Do you have a choice of schools or is there only the one?

Dd is August, and she has just started. She seems fine so far.

I think it is far harder for them to settle in half way through the year tbh when friendships etc are established. By January in Reception, ds1 ( a June birthday) was reading and writing - if a child only started at this point there is so much ground to make up.

my oldest is an august baby a boy and small for his age, had speech therapy etc so i really worried on a number of fronts. i wish i could have been one of those organised people who plan conception around school years! his first teacher rather harshly tols me he'd struggle till he's 7 which at 4 really stressed me. However we are off to his (belated! one of the problems of having yr birthday in august!) 7th birthday party today and she was right - he has really come on, his best friends are all the older boys, he still has "action plan" help reading but is doing his best etc. So with the benfit of hinsight i'd say take a long term view and they all catch up eventually!

my youngest was an elective section tho and they offered to do it on 31 august - i said no thanks i'll cross my legs till 2 sept so she'll be the oldest in the year - and typical, i think like some others here, she would cope fine with going earlier! That's girls for you!

DS2 is an August birthday, but started school full time in January rather than the previous September. I think he was emotionally and physically mature but not intellectually mature. As a consequence he has always underperformed - right up to GCSE level. Fortunately this area can be helped by being in small classes and tutoring though it is a pity he went through years and years when he didn't quite "get it". On the other hand, one of his friends was born on the 31st August and has always been top academically. It really depends on the child, but in general summer born children tend to struggle in the school system more than autumn/winter born children.

Ds3 is August 29th - he has just turned 3 so next September he will start in reception full time.

Tbh, I'm not really worrying about it as I have no way of knowing, a year in advance, how he is going to cope with it. Children change so much in a year. Ds2 has just started reception this September - up until 6 months ago I thought he would be very different to ds1, perhaps slower to pick things up, showed no interest in letters/writing/numbers etc. In the last 6 months he has suddenly taken an interest, unprompted by me, and has started reception already reading and he has gone straight on to reading books in his first week.

He is a Nov birthday so he's older in the year, but it's just an example of how much can change when they are 2, 3 and 4 in such a short space of time.

Ds3 shows no signs of being able to write anything or read anything but that's now and I have no way of knowing what he will be like in 12 months time.

He is going to the school nursery for afternoons this year - the main thing for me is that he is comfortable in the environment he is in, familiar with the school and the teachers and familiar with the 'procedures' and rules if you like.

At this stage (nursery and reception) it's all so play based and more about settling into the environment and developing social skills so I'm not worried about whether he can read and write or not. Certainly not at this stage.

If I were you I'd stop thinking about it altogether - it's 2 YEARS AWAY! For all you know, he could be raring to go by then!