Summer born chikd

[efy]

Hello mums, 🤗
I have my son who is currently 3 years old, turning 4 in June this year.
According to LA, he is due to start school this autumn term, Sept 2020.
Even though he is my 3rd child, he is very different than my other kids. He is very attached to myself and if I move an inch he is right there with me. He does not feel comfortable with new people around and can get into real hysterical episodes, if I attempt to leave him.
I'm not overly protective mum, as I was alright with my other kids, going to school when they were 4 years old. However I feel that he, is just not ready for school. He even insists on wearing nappy still, which I believe might be to do with his baby sibling.
We had to cancel even the nursery last year, for the same reason. Not much has changed since then.

Based on this, we did not register him for the 2020 admission, we would like him to start, the term 2021 instead. We did not do it on purpose because I knew if we did it we will have to force him into going to school this autumn.
After reading some other parents stories, I'm now concerned with the fact that they may ask us to either take him in part-time basis, or that he may need to start school, straight into year 1 instead of reception.
Please if anyone went to the same experience, not registering to school, what is the best approach on this issue, before contacting anyone? Thank you for taking the time to reading my post. Xx

Re. the suggestions that OP go to the GP - my LA asks parents to provide supporting information about why delaying entry to Reception is in the best interests of the child.

If there were any SEN and / or medical conditions that might be relevant here, say if development is delayed, then being able to say to the LA that your child has a diagnosis of X or was on a diagnosis pathway, or being referred because of developmental delays etc would be helpful.

I agree with Malmontar that that’s where input from the GP would be useful, to check whether OP’s child is developing normally. Although that’s not to say that any of this necessarily applies in OP’s case.

You may be a GP @waterbottle12 and I got to declare I'm not. But I'm presently literally surrounded by GPs, consultants, specialists, and other medics in the immediate family circle including my son who became the 9th doctor some three years ago followed by another nephew a year later. I had stood watching my own grandmother treating young children as young as a few days old to around 20 years old (myself) ever since I was a toddler myself. But grandma had passed away when I was 23. Not being funny here, but I'm ready to bet you anything you want on who can handle a young, or very young child better.... GP or not!

As far as I can gather here, OP isn't exactly a greenhorn coming into the child-rearing game. She's obviously very concerned about her 3rd child coming to nearly four years old but still insisting on wearing nappies amongst other things.

"...if I move an inch he is right there with me. He does not feel comfortable with new people around and can get into real hysterical episodes, if I attempt to leave him."

Not for want of trying, but I'm sure OP has tried all that good advice as suggested by @prepenultimate and others and I can see her concerns for her 3rd child is beginning to cause her mental stress, if not already, which can dangerously lead to possible future mental health problems for both mother and child. This by itself is good enough reason to go knocking on the GP's door not to mention there may be underlying issues that make her third child behaving this way.

If truth be known, I'm truly astounded by a GP coming on here to say this is not their problem. Don't know where you come from but from where I am, I've seen GPs, for example, writing successfully to the local council about their patients' housing problems; dealing with relationship problems, amongst a host of other problems. And good luck to OP!

Same as my LA @PureAlchemy, but I think if the OP were suggesting her dc has SEN, then she would have put that in the OP.
I did ask in my first reply if she had discussed her concerns with her HV, but OP hasn't been back / replied.

I agree that if you think a child is so significantly affected by their SEND that they need to not be in the same year group as their peers, then that is a reason the LA would consider it, and then, the LA would want to see the evidence, but - where I live certainly, that is evidence that would be going back over time, of concerns, differentiation and intervention, not a sudden visit 'to get the GP to say (s)he agrees the child ought to be held back a year'.

My LA requests supporting information, but the general attitude is very accepting of summer born deferral, so it doesn’t seem to need to carry much weight. I just put that we thought he would be better off with another year at pre school. My husband is a GP but I don’t think we wrote that on the form...

@efy
I didn't say this wasn't my problem. I said that in the absence of a diagnosed medical condition, a GP won't write a letter.

If the OP is worried enough to bring her son to the GP then it may well be that some input, referral to community paeds etc is appropriate, but we still wouldn't generally get involved in school admissions unless there is a diagnosis.

@peteneras that should have said (post above)

OP, please don’t panic, as I think many of the posters here have misunderstood the process and I really don’t think you have made a particularly bigger headache for yourself than anyone else who chooses to defer or delay entry.

1. contact your admissions team on ASAP. I believe late admissions are still open, and it may be that the procedure for applying for delayed entry is not clear in your area (it often isn’t).
2. If you are able to still apply for this year, do. If not, you will be allocated a place at the nearest school with spaces. This does not mean you have to take the space, or that you cannot defer/delay.
3. request the delay application paperwork from your admissions team. Some claim there is a deadline but they CANNOT enforce it.
4. make the decision whether you want to delay or defer. Delaying means your child will take up a reception space but does not need to start until either January or Easter. This used to be popular, but be aware, the ‘play based’ curriculum moves very quickly. At my son’s school, most children are reading simple books by Christmas and they get through phonics very fast.
5. Join the Summerborn admissions group on Facebook. There is a lot of support, and there will be people with experience in your local admission authority.
6. do not be misled about nursery. If your child is born after 1st April, you are entitled to existing funding (either 15 or 30 hours) until the July in the term they turn 5.

Good luck, and whatever you do, contact your LEA ASAP

The Local Government Ombudsman has recently issued guidance to admission authorities on deferred summer born children which reminds them that the question they need to consider is not should this child start in September X year or the following September but that if the parent/carer choses to delay the child's admission until the September after the child turns 5 is it in the child's best interest to start in Reception or Year 1. This is one example of the cases that led to them issuing the guidance www.lgo.org.uk/decisions/education/school-admissions/17-017-609

It does need to be agreed in advance however but I know the LA I work for will consider them right through until the end of this academic year for children due to start in September 2020. After that we will not consider it as it is an In Year application and at the discretion of the head of the school

Regardless of when he will end up starting school, I think you should be looking at trying to get him to cope away from you. As someone else mentioned, that could start at stay-and-play groups, asking another mum to keep an eye while you nip to the toilet. Ideally work up to doing some sessions at a nursery or similar.

Some nurseries will not take children who are school age; you should check that out with your local ones, because it may mean that doing nursery sessions is not an option next year. Starting school full-time having not been to nursery at all might be very difficult.