Middle class parents trying to get private school bursaries

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Would really welcome people's thoughts on this. I know of a couple of couples who are trying to get bursaries for their children to go to private school. They are all highly educated people from wealthy backgrounds but who either have low paying creative jobs (e.g. artist/film-maker) or left highly paying jobs to start their own companies which have yet to succeed. Both couples live in high-cost luxury, rented apartments but have little income coming in (although enough savings to keep paying the rent). I think if they want there kids to go to private school they should get off their arses and do some work that pays, rather than getting the school (AKA other parents at the school) to to pay for their kids education. What do you think as this is really pissing me off!!!! (Btw, I live in crap accommodation, and work all hours doing a job I hate to pay for my children's school fees). Are they taking the piss or am I just full of sour grapes because I didn't do what they're doing?

It really is better when several bursaries are awarded regularly as part of an established system, rather than the odd one on an ad hoc nod and whisper basis. Where bursary recipients make up a sizeable portion of the school community this to a large extent obviates Hoppinggreen‘s ‘fish out of water’ syndrome.

There are several parents at my children’s private school who make absolutely no secret of the fact they fiddle their own wages to get their children a bursary - one lives in a huge house, regularly updates their very lovely land rover and just went on a 6 week holiday with her two children to a far flung destination. She has her own company so doesn’t pay herself a wage (gets that back in cash via someone else) and is divorced and has child maintenance paid in cash. None of it above board and especially does this around the time the school asks for statements to check income. She may be lying of course to us but that is what she tells us. Both kids on very nice bursaries so yes I do agree that the system sucks, many people game it and it isn’t the truly deserving on a bursary at all.

Not sure what you mean by middle class? Surely you just mean "people who can't afford" private school. Which is who the bursaries are for. You would probably say I am middle class but I can't afford to go private !

I don't think you necessarily know more about other people's financial situations than the bursary committee does. They will have looked into the financial background of these people and decided if they qualify for the bursary. If it was a choice between that child and another equally qualified child from an even poorer background, the child from the poorer background would be prioritised.

"private schools have charitable status"

Actually not all of them do - the special school my child goes to doesn't

At DS school the bursary application puts a cap on earnings, a cap on value of property/investments & wants to know if grandparents can contribute. It seems robust & they will give 100% in some cases.

@Chilver I think ti depends on the school. Some specify that they have needs-blind interviewing. Eg Eton. You apply. If you get offered a place the envelope will also contain information saying that, if you require assessment for a bursary you need to complete a form. If you complete the form, they will assess you. They normally receive more applications for bursaries than their bursary pot allows, so they have to make very difficult choices about who is most deserving. This quickly eliminates parents who could tighten their boot straps to afford the fees.

Over the years I have known a number of families whose children have been offered generous bursaries on top of full music scholarships that cover all music tuition. One of these students arrived on a bursary from a very disadvantaged background and discovered his musical talent at school. The school went above and beyond to make sure that he was fully included, for example covering his travel expenses for choir trips overseas.

lulu

It was in response to schools not offering many bursaries to get charitable status.
They all aren't like that, my dd school isn't.

I definitely agree about knowing the system. My son has a bursary from a public school and we only thought to apply because we a) knew the school (via a teacher friend), b) I have had some involvement in the school system, and c) we both come from MC/Oxbridge/Russell Group backgrounds, so had no worries about being fish out of water (even though financially we are, but that's not a concern). We don't have 'hobby jobs', we both work hard in the public sector where the pay is crap. But if our backgrounds had been different, I don't think it would have occurred to us to apply. DS's primary school would never have suggested it (and was slightly frosty when we did, though they did give a reference). I know of a couple of v bright kids from much poorer families (and much more WC backgrounds) who would never have considered applying. Though I'm pleased that I have (I think) persuaded another friend to apply for her son.

if our backgrounds had been different, I don't think it would have occurred to us to apply ...

Absolutely. People need telling.

The hardest thing to communicate is that the grander the school the greater the likelihood of a substantial bursary. I have often felt a little frustrated on behalf of posters who rather timidly enquire about applying for the one grudging, under the counter bursary on offer at the possibly mediocre (day) school down the road - when their circumstances suggest they should really be applying for 100% at a full boarding school a couple of hours away.

(And yes, it would be wonderful if everyone had access to brilliant state schools. But we don’t.)

The majority of Bursaries are means tested and they will look at the savings etc.

This couple just won't qualify for the bursary

In my view, bursaries are for people who are doing the best they can but can't afford the fees.

This is one function of some bursaries, but it's not the only one.

Private schools usually have charitable status, but they also need to turn a profit. So they need to be places where loaded folk would want to send their children. So they need to have stellar exam results, an impressive orchestra/choir, beautiful artwork on the walls, national sporting triumphs.... It would be nice to think these things happen because of dedicated, highly skilled teachers, but they are much easier to achieve if you get kids in who can do them in the first place. So it is in the school's interest to attract the academic, the musical, the sporty. At the indie school I worked in, only a tiny proportion of bursaries were awarded to students from financially precarious backgrounds (and they'd've been out on their ear if their grades or behaviour dipped). The rest went to kids who would make the school look good to future customers parents (eg kids were considered for sporting bursaries if, minimum, they already represented the county in two different sports). So the 'charitable' bursaries were actually more of a smart business move.

If paying for your DC's school fees is ruining your quality of life then seriously consider joining the 93%.

001.00001
I'm not selfish (I don't think) and I'm not wealthier than these people. They just choose to spend their money on their lifestyle and want others to pay for their children's education. For the record, each pay the best part of £50K in rent a year for their palatial homes. They talk about his quite openly i.e. how stressful it is when I'm thinking - you could just live somewhere else cheaper.

Scholarships and bursaries are completely different things. Hth.

Have you considered that the highly educated individual who left a well paid job to set up own company and who is living off savings did this to gain a better work life balance and spend more time with their family? Rather than 'beat the system'. I know of a family where this has happened, kids moved to private at same time of business transition as this coincided with age of eldest going to secondary. No bursary, no scholarship. They now live very much within their means, sensibly using savings and income from one employment. Kids see more of both parents and go to the best school locally. Don't make assumptions on others financial situations just on outward appearance. Would you want somebody to scrutinise your finances in this way as to why/why not you had the car, house, holidays you have? I agree with the point that all need to be aware of bursaries. Some families I know who criticise and sneer at the families and kids at private school don't realise they could actually manage to send their kids there. Caveat, I'm way outside London...

OP, stop judging others and get on with your own life. Dds school requests pay slips, full bank disclosure and they do home visits.

I very much doubt that those getting full bursaries are kids with parents who are themselves from a poverty background. It will be parents who are from better off backgrounds and either chosen to take lower paying jobs or fallen on hard times.

What? Why does that matter?

Tbh dds school has ten fully funded places for children from backgrounds where being at boarding school would make a huge difference to their lives. I couldn't tell you which students receive them. Sounds good though. Of course, if you hate the idea of anyone having anything more than you do, you'll dismiss it as rubbish.

There are people who play the bursary system just as there are people who play the benefits system. Sometimes they do both at the same time.

Those work/life balance arguments don't apply at all. I can't be bothered to give all the additional info but that is def not a reason. Yes - I would fully accept people pondering over my finances/spending if I looked like I was trying to get a freebie when it looked like I had quite a lot of money. These people do exactly that with people who are on benefits. Anyway - I'm over it now. I don't have to 'get on with my own life' as this issue never stopped that - it just bugged me. I suspected there would be a range of opinion and there is. Over and out.

Apply for a bursary then!

That's good op.

Please try and remember that people who put their children into a private school also pay taxes contributing to state education for other children and they are entitled to have a decent lifestyle.

OP why haven’t you applied for a bursary then? Also I would wait to be annoyed until you see if these people actually get anything. I could apply to Oxford today but it doesn’t mean anything about my chances of going to Oxford.

I can't help feeling that people are better off keeping details, such as bursaries, to themselves. I had no idea it caused resentment. My son had one but we were quite hard up at the time and needed it, though it wasn't a lot. I didn't tell anyone about it though and nobody asked.