Private schools are not a choice

[daddiesrule]

Having read a few threads about private schools recently, I found an article on the DM which wound me up massively. It stated that sending your DC to private school was a choice; am I the only idiot who thinks this isn't true?

It's only a choice for those who can afford it - if your salary is not large enough to cover it, it is definitely not a choice. Why should children who have parents in low paid jobs not have the same access to education as those with parents who earn significantly more?

Secondly, the whole reason state schools are so poorly funded is because of private schools. If all MPs and political donors were forced to use the state sector, I reckon funding for education would increase over night.

It seems unreasonable to justify having a poorly funded education system because some affluent parents have to option to pay to avoid it. This is the opposite of social mobility.

Sorry, the above message was to DappleGrey and to OP, who clearly has stopped reading.

I think it’s inevitable that at some “ordinary” independent schools especially those offering some boarding tthat over time international students will eventually outnumber UK pupils. Although it’s possible over time international parents will become more discerning as they come to realise that they are not quite getting what they’re paying for and that not all UK independent schools are equal.
I do think that international pupils have saved the bacon of many “ordinary” independent schools especially the small non selective rural ones who offer some boarding these have put their fees up to such an extent that they ate outside of the reach of small town solicitor the largish farmer and the village doctor.

I was wondering S and B was!!!

Thank you for answering my question Xing

I’ve never heard demands that the French Lycees or American schools in London should be abolished.

Historically, these schools principally served expats whose children were expected to re-enter the French or American school systems and, therefore, needed a different curriculum. Even today, the vast majority of graduates from ASL and other American schools attend US universities, so are not really competing for places at UK universities.

The reality is that the vast majority emerge from thre big name public schools and go onto to lead normal lives.

If you define top 1% as normal.

Thank you expat for that explanation which makes sense.

“If you define top 1% as normal”
I’m unsure what you getting at expat96 they have jobs get married or find partners, kids where possible homes holidays etc maybe more expensive than others and in some cases Iess than average. Just like most of us.
My DH went to very big name London super selective yup I acknowledge at least a couple of cabinet ministers judges actors etc are amongst its alumni. But a few years ago he went to memorial service for someone he knew when he was there. He met up with old school friends most like him were fairly successful in professional occupations living average MC lives not exactly what the top 1%.

DS went to a "named" public school ( not Eton) - pretty much keeping up with friends of his who went to comprehensives , State 6th form colleges and yes those who went to other private / independent schools (post university .)

Gosh - if only I had thought he could be top 1%

He is very normal and mixing it with ex alumni of all sorts of schools & universities.

I think a school should be a bit carpe diem. Yes it helps but if ( and only if ) a pupil wants to go on to tertiary education , then the school will fall away into the background. I think a school needs to be good enough to get a pupil on to the next step. Whatever that may be. Once done, well , job done.

I've met one person who went to public school. He's a lovely man and a musician struggling like the rest.
I did tell instantly though, and he was surprised how I'd guessed.
I can't quite put my finger on what it was that stood out tbh, it was just obvious to me.
As I say though just a normal, nice chap.
Good social skills too, but a lot of people have who haven't attended a public school.

”Good social skills too, but a lot off people have who haven’t attended a public school”
Surely the point is that you can’t generalise I know people from both sectors with crap social skills it’s far more complicated than what school you attended.
I do think Romany you’re right some from public schools do stand out. I met my DH when he was at school we were once at some school rowing thing and a group of boys were walking towards us I knew straight away they were from DH’s school just by the way they walked. We went to some social function once and there was a man there who was 30 years older than my DH but they knew and I knew within 10 mins they’d been to the same school even though nothing was said when they first met.

HG

That's why I mentioned that you can have good social skills irrespective of the school.
You are right, it was nothing that I could say, that's it. There was nothing that stuck out, he is just generally different.
A lovely man though, a good loyal friend, and not stuck up at all. Not that he should be

It is a choice and it's a choice you have to make early in life.

Probably not going to be popular but here goes

I grew up in a family with very little money.

When I was growing up my friends chose to go out and play..... I chose to study.

When I was old enough to get a paper delivery job, I chose to.

When a bit older and my friends chose to go out and drink...... i chose to study.

I chose to get myself into lots of debt going through college and university. I worked in bars through every holiday to help pay my bills.

Whilst at college and university ..... i chose to study rather than go out every night.

Now that i can afford it ..... i choose to send my kids to private school.

Secondly, the whole reason state schools are so poorly funded is because of private schools
I disagree.

I think you are wrong that state is underfunded because of private.

How can this be the case as they are self funded.

The govt funds state school and they are to blame. And I’m talking about ALL govt in the last 30 years not just today’s.

Schools have been a experimental tool for decades. Instead of investment each govt changes things and meddles. Let the experience of staff do the job.

So YABU

Blaming the independent sector for the failings of successive govts to fund state education properly is just nonsense.

If govts funded state education properly, if they stoped meddling with what teachers teach and how they mark and if they left schools the fuick alone and let professionals be professionals you might just find that the private sector would natually shrink as parents saw that they could have an excellent state funded education without having to pay again to buy an indie education.

Or in other words - I completely agree made!

State schools are not a choice for all.

My local comprehensive is a faith school. We are not of the right faith. There was no choice to send DD.

Next nearest school is a super selective grammar. DD middle of the road academically. It was not a choice.

2 further school state schools nearby. One was a lottery admissions. No luck in the lottery. DD was not given the choice to go. Next state school. Very popular, outstanding, admissions on nearest to school. Many families buy the large houses nearby to gain admission. It was not a feasible choice to sell up & move near.

Many families turn to private schools as they have no feasible state option. You cannot just criticise private schools for selection by ability to pay, when many, many state schools also have selection criteria which prevent them being a choice for many, such as selection by faith or selection by high academic ability.

Private schools take no resources from state schools. They have very little impact at all on the state system. Is the same true of Faith or Grammar schools?

a friend of mine says she could never possibly consider sending her two kids to private school as she could never afford it.

meanwhile the difference in value between her house and mine is approximately 80% of what it would cost to send two kids to a private school just for seniors, and the remainder would be paid for if they went on less expensive holidays.

egalitarianism is nice in theory but it would be abhorrent to stop people from spending their money on something as important as education while still letting the rich buy 6+ bedroom mansions, BMW cars, nice holidays and leisure club memberships that are just as out of reach of ordinary people but less important.

if you're advocating for the socialist revolution to prevent people buying a step up from inadequate state education then have the honesty to be consistent and apply the same principles to everything.

Many choices are not available to everybody for all kinds of reasons. That is not a reason for blanket removal of the option. Neither do I see any evidence that state schools are weak because of the private sector.

I was stated educated all the way through and always imagined my kids would be. Then the state sector let them down badly and I had NO CHOICE other than to find a way to educate them privately. I worked hard to find the resources to pay for it and it has been worthwhile. After what I have experienced there is no line I wouldn’t cross to preserve that option.