If you could choose would you opt for private or state schools?

[sportyspice]

It's a while before dd1 goes to school but i can't decide which route to take. It is going to cost a heck of alot of money from start to finish to educate both dd's privately but we don't know whether to take each year as it comes and see how it goes. We can afford to do the junior school bit very comfortably but aren't sure about how feasible the late secondary school years will be..would you just do what you can or would you not proceed for fear of having to then integrate the children into a state school having already had private education and be classed as snobs? Also is it unfair to proceed with a private education if you can't also provide the 10 horses, 5 mansions etc to go with it? are they likely to be excluded by friends for being the "poorer" ones or do other couples scrimp and save to afford this? bit rambly i know but honest advice please

Okay, for what it's worth, I went to bording school from age 8 (not Cheltenham or Roedeen but similar Edam .
I would be against boarding school unless close-ish to home.
We are planning to go private for secondary school (state for primary )though it will be a tight squeeze financially.
Although there is an excellent school in the area it wouldn't be right for our girls as you have to really really want to learn to go there!!
The other one however is well grounded - all sorts of children go and would be great for confidence building, something that my kids need -plus small classes.
The local stae school has enormous classes - they would be lost, never speak up and I don't believe they would do that well there.
That said, they have to pass the exam!!!

I think that SP has made the most valid point here. In my years working in education I have realised that the biggest inluence on a child's educational experience is parents.

At my school, where many parents play very little part in their child's education (I get phone calls in which the parent cannot tell me their child's maths teacher, form tutor, year group or even age!) the teaching is phenomenal because we try desperately hard to compensate. We do, of course, have a "poor reputation" and "bad results".

I am about to start the primary school search and am determined to look beyond the mummy grapevine to decide on a good school for ds (our local primary has a reputation and results like mine, but fantastic ofsted report!). Private is just not something dp or I would ever contemplate. We have different priorities with our money and know from experience how excellent the state system is (and how to work it - lol!)

sorry - I meant to conclude my first point by saying that it s the influence of parents which is the most important, so as long as you are an active and involved and supportive parent, your choice of school is fairly immaterial!

still didn't phrase that very well. Oh dear, pg head. I mean, a well thought out decision is bound to be the right one, whether private or state!

thanks for the school info jimjams, and hercules I am also interested to hear what school you mean

three weeks from now, I will have visited half a dozen or so of our local state schools - grammars and comps - as we have to apply for secondary education soon. I might have something more to say if this discussion is still going then.....

the state schools in our area (hastings) arent up to much & if finances allowed i would dearly love to send my children private. unfortunately this isnt possible for us so we intend to move areas next year for much better (& much smaller) schools for our two dd`s.

Sorry - haven't read all the posts.......
My dd is only 8 months but we've recently been discussing this. I went to a state primary school and then a private day school (girls) from 11-18 and would dearly love to do the same for my dd. I had a lovely primary school and my parents paid for a little bit of extra tuition, then I went on to a highly academic senior school (bearing in mind that I'm anything but highly academice !). My senior school was great - I was there on a full assisted place (sadly a system that left when the Labour government came in ) - so was definitely one of the 'poorest' girls.............however it was never an issue (could be do with it being a day school versus a boarding school?).
My sister went to a state senior school and hated it - was picked on mercilessly, not supported academically etc. etc - so this has probably coloured my view of the private vs. state debate.
Good luck deciding what is best for you!
mit x

Personally, I believe in state education and supporting local schools where possible, but haven't yet had to put principles into practice (not that I could afford private education). I find it alarming that there's such a big drop in standard between primary and secondary. I always assume this is because there are more academically motivated pupils educated privately from age 11, reducing the general level in the state sector. Of course parents making an individual choice do whatever they think best, so I wouldn't criticise anyone personally. Perhaps if all state-educated pupils were exempted from university tuition fees it would act as an incentive for the whole community to support state education. (There would be nothing to stop private schools giving a refund/reducing their fees if they find they have to compete for pupils, so it's not such a radical idea!)

Muminlondon - one reason for the difference between primary and secondary is that the gvmt have been concentrating their efforts (eg reducing class sizes etc) on primary ed rather than secondary, along with early years ed - research shows that money invested in early years makes a greater difference to outcomes for the child than at later stage.

STATE!I went to private and my son is in the local state school and it is fantastic It offers a wide cross section of people excellent teachers and he is a lot more rounded and happy than I ever was!give the local schools a chance by using and supporting your local school things can only improve

Does anyone know of any good websites you can look at to find out what 'types' of schools there are in you area? eg. avg class size, results etc.

Also, what questions should you ask about the schools you visit? ie. when being showed around.

TIA

Noddy - my ds starts at your son's school tomorrow......

There was a gap before this government came into power anyway. It is harder to maintain discipline the older the pupils get and prevent disruption - that seems to another reason. If I was ever in the position to consider private schools it would probably be to avoid bullying, etc. I went to a state school and while I wasn't bullied, it can be a bit lonely/boring being in the minority of only 20% or less getting 5 O'level passes and aspiring to go to university and I wish there had been more of us.

look at the Ofsted site here for schools in your area and lots of info, or upmystreet.com gives you nearest schools with past results.

Thanks muminlondon

I was a boarder from the age of 9 at top independent school. I had a superb education but was desperately unhappy. It is something that my mother and I will always quarrel about.

If I can possibly afford it I plan to educate my children privately but not send them away to do this. If there is an exceptional state school nearby then I would reconsider.

fisil, I have to disagree with you! As a highly involved mummy with DDs first school (volunteer on school trips, in to let the school know about probs at home etc) we were very badly let down by the Head on a number of occasions. They were happy to let DS3 sit outside the Head's office for an ENTIRE TERM & didn't think to let us know.

Eventually moved all of mine out of that school & had to go to work so had NO involvement with DS3s last school & that was the best for him. (Incidentally with 4 kids & hundereds of teachers- all now at secondary- I've no idea who their maths teachers are etc...)

If you can afford the primary school fees I would go for it.
You can never get back those years and they are so important. Agree with Fisil and Tallulah but would add

Primary school fees are a FRACTION of secondary.

My son is currently in a private school but he is starting at a state school in January. We dont know yet if he is going to have learnning difficulties but either way he learns slower that the other kids at the moment. We feel that the private system might overwhelm him as they do push children a lot more and expect a lot out of them. It is not a money issue with us, just what we feel is right for him and I think that ultimately should be the reason why any parent chooses a school if they have a choice that is. state suits some and not others. as a fammily Im not sure we could cope in the private system. we are not in to the Im better than you thing and keeping up . I know plenty of people on both sides of the fence, and I am perched neatly in the middle.

I think it depends if you have a good state school available to you.

I have the pleasure of living in Hull which is permanently at the bottom of the league tables with the gap between them and the next one up in the list widening.

Consequently I send mine to private day school from the age of 8. Low fees, yet one of the better performing schools.

Don't worry abou the other parents, its your child that counts and they make friends no matter what their back grounds. Most of the parents at the school are rightly concerned about the state of the schools in Hull and are generally from ordinary back grounds. I like its "unsnobbish" attitude and down to earth approach.

By the way Mine went to state primary, which are amazingly quite good. So state then private seems a better approach.

Good luck

Goodkate....I saw on the TV this morning that Hull is gettinng a revamp and they are piling cash into re-development like the Deep...everyone was really positive. I wonder if this is how it really is.

State school if you can get into a good one, if not I'd have no hesitation in going private - but only to a good one.

Thanks for your interest Pepsi. Hull has been saying things like this for years. They built a new school called Endeavour High about 3/4 years ago as a new start. 5 pupils got 5 GCSE's at grade c or above out of 257 pupils. MMMMmmmmm.

The problem is that Hull has a big drinking culture. The kids think its pointless getting qualifications 'cos it never did there dad/mum any good so there is very little motivation. The brighter kids get bullied. The problem is endemic and who can blame the teachers for being disenchanted. Its very sad. When i was a girl the schools were good with high expectations.

Its also our leftie bullying council who have failed to spend money regenerating the city, although we are hoping for change with the new liberals.

We've been promised many things over the years but Hull is still stuck in a 70's time warp and full of inverted snobbery.