Would you rather spend money on private education for your children, or gifting them with a mortgage free house?

[Amyk01]

My husband and I are not wealthy by any means, but are fortunate to be mortgage free meaning we save the vast majority of our income. We are planning what to do with the money we are saving, and can’t decide whether it would be more beneficial to:

1. Spend this money on private education for our 2 children throughout primary/junior with the hopes of them getting into the local grammar for senior. Should they not get into grammar, it would be private school for senior too.
2. Send them to the local state schools (which really aren’t all that great), and after university gift them with the money we have saved in private school fees to allow them to purchase homes mortgage free?

I have looked into private school fees and I’m confident that with our income we would be able to afford it. My feelings are that with private education, our children would ‘hopefully’ turn out to be very well rounded individuals which will stand them in good stead for life. Where as the mortgage free home would ensure they don’t have any significant financial worries for the remainder of their life. Each has its pro’s and con’s but I’m not sure which route to take?

SIL went to private school and her parents bought her a house.

She's now a SAHM and plans never to work - having no housing costs was the thing that enabled her to have that choice. Whether you think this is a good or a bad thing is of course, a matter of opinion.

We planned to do the house thing but ended up.paying for private. We started off with state schools but I needed better wrap around care and as my career really ramped up, this felt the right fit for us.

I would not necessarily do it for the ultimate outcome, more for the experience and the fit of the child.

One of ours ended up at a big name public school but then again it was more because of how things developed for that child.

It depends on the child. My DS has autism, so a private education would very likely not be in his best interests. Giving him a secure home for the rest of his life? I would love to provide that for him. He may very well be able to live on his own someday, but I don't know if he'll be much of a high earner.

Mortgage free house. Hands down. That is so so valuable.

Education every single time. We plan to financially support our DC through uni (rent & bills, etc but not tuition fees) and if our income allows, help them with a contribution towards a small house deposit.

On principle, I don't believe gifting them a mortgage free house encourages a hard work ethic. I'd rather that they "worked for it" themselves especially since they would have had plenty of life's advantages with regard to a decent education. We give them the tools and it's up to them to make the most of their opportunities.

I don't know where you live in the country, but where I live the money saved on private school fees would be a pretty handy deposit but would in no way enable your children to buy a house mortgage free. Unless your schools are incredibly expensive and your houses incredibly cheap the amounts aren't comparable.

I suppose if you live in Plymouth it might work, if your children want to live in Plymouth. But not if they want to move to Exeter, Bristol or London.

Actually, I was going to make the same point as Ontopofthesunset.

Being given a house in, say, Lewes may not be all that helpful if the children want to live in Scotland. Yes, they can let it out or sell it but selling houses takes time.

You do also have the option to pay into your children's ISA or pension.

Buying me a house would have been absolutely pointless until now (I’m 33) as since graduating I’ve lived in 4 countries and 8 counties. Only just ‘settled’ (and actually not planning to be here forever, probably about 5 years)

House.

True, private education is lovely but what happens if you shell out for an education and then your child turns round and says that they want to be a policeperson or a teacher? You really don't need to spend £200,000 to do either of those jobs.

Also if they are clever, then grammar. If they need extra help then get tutors.

Or as some of the others have said, spend your money moving next door to the best school locally.

Private education - without question.

There are 4 of us in my close circle of friends, I am the only one who went to the state school, the other three were privately educated. Two of them went to uni, 1 didn’t and neither did I. One is a teacher, one a teaching assistant and one has an office job. None of them are paid over 35k and I am the nearest to paying of my mortgage. For that reason I’m not convinced a private education is really worth it.

Private education. If you chose the right school it’s so much more ...

I would say private education. If you choose the right school it can be worth more than any mortgage.
I’m sure there are also many state schools that are just as good however I do beleive a private education helps children’s confidence, ambitions and opportunities.

Is it not up to an individual to purchase their own house and earn it with their own income and their job?

I will not give any of my children a property as I think they have to make their on way in life. If I have the means I will help them with the deposit though. They will have to pay the mortgage.

Regarding schools. It depends on the child and the state options we have around. I will pay private education for a child if he/she is a hard working person and conscientious, if it is the right fit for the child because I think she/he will have a nicer learning experience not because they will achieve better in life than state educated children as this depends on the child ambitious, perseverance and wanting to succeed.

I will not however put the family through financial pressure just to send them private as financial security and a happy family is more important.

With out doubt money for a property

There are some great state schools. At each stage, think objectively about whether a particular private school would significantly benefit your particular child more than a particular state school. This is less about the end results than about what the school experience is like for the child, and what that does to their mental health and their character. Beyond a school being generally decent, that mainly depends on whether the child fits in to the school, and is within their norms.

I went to a lovely state school for 4 years, then an awful state school for 2 years, then a lovely private school for 7 years. I am enormously grateful to my parents for my private education (and often tell them that) and I would far rather have had that than the approx 18k it cost them (25 years ago). I would almost certainly have got all As at any school (unless things went very badly wrong) but at my private school I was nurtured, allowed to be myself, and encouraged in the STEM subjects which are my natural home (not the norm for a girl in the 80s).

Although I would never tell them this, I very much wish that they had sent me to private school 2 years earlier. The character changes I made to survive those 2 years in a bad school have rippled through my life: some positives, but mainly negatives. Btw, the 4 years in the lovely state primary were entirely positive, and being at a private school would have made no difference there.

Partly as a result of my experience, my DD is at private school. It will cost approx 200k all the way through. That's not enough to buy even a flat around here, but as a deposit would certainly give her access to buying her own home. Despite that, I'm still choosing education over a house deposit, because I believe education impacts the very person we become, which has the biggest impact on our future life happiness. I don't mind what she does with her education (ie high status career) but hope that it will help her to be happy in herself, no matter what she does. Fingers crossed!

Private education by a running mile.

How about buying a rental property and using the rent to pay school fees? Then you will have a house to sell and divide between them as a deposit at the end.

I think the question doesn't quite work for most areas, because the saving on school, fees wouldn't be enough for a mortgage free house - so the choice isn't as stark as suggested.

Personally, I always say, don't pay for Independnet unless;
A. The individual independent available to you offers significantly more than the state available to you. (So, if the state is very very poor and the independent is very very good then it is more worth it, but in many cases, the Independnet isn't actually significantly better nor the state very poor, so the clear cut gain is small)
B. Most importantly I would say don't pay unless you can do it without it making a major impact on your lifestyle. Mor most people it's not worth going without holidays or money for a new boiler etc to pay for this.

Personally, I would want to have a good chunk of money in the bank if paying fees - partly as a back up for fees, but also for all kinds of emergencies and the future. I wouldn't consider fees unless I had this.....and actually this would probably then allow me to gift a deposit contribution to my child....so I don't see it as an either /or choice, but that those paying fees often are able to give deposit money too.

I wouldn't be interested in a mortgage free house gift. I don't think it's beneficial to not have to make any payment for your accommodation. However, I would be interested in helping a child get together their deposit so they can then lay their mortgage themselves.

And if I could pay fees without it making a big impact on my lifestyle and if there was a great Independnet locally, then I would pay. I don't just see the value of these particularly great schools (not run of the mill 2nd raters) in terms of the exam results or the jobs people later do - so purely in grades or finances - but more broadly in terms of less tangible benefits such as opportunities to foster interest in a broader range of areas or depth in a certain area - the experience and journey itself, which can make a less obvious impact on later life). Being able to choose for these things and not just grades or future job is indeed a luxury and I think why many people for whom money is no object do choose Iindepenendt. It's not always easy for those who have no real experience of this handful of very top schools and who only measure in terms of grades and salary paid by the job later chosen, to see what the benefits might be, especially compared to a good comp or state grammar.