As much info, experience and advice as possible please RE:steiner education.

[BeWorthy]

OK. Where do I start?

My son has always been quit ill so we put him on a very different diet where he only eats all organic, no dairy etc, no sugar etc. So his body stays as healthy as possible.

He is one of the youngest of the academic year as he was four in August. So putting him into school in September just gone was a big concern for me, maybe I'm an over protective parent (but is there such thing?) But I hated the whole idea. Admissions, school uniforms, everything. He started in September as one of the youngest and he has stuggled, and so have I. He has struggled to settle in and go into school willingly, he has struggled to sit at a table all day, he has struggled to eat a very different lunch to his classmates. I have struggled with wanting to talk to a teacher who spends more time with my child than I do but her never having the time as she has 30 four year olds. But what really irritated me recently was when I was doing homework with my son ( he has LOTS of homework, at 4, reading diaries, homework diaries, targets, etc) and he has always been left handed, but on this evening of homework after the teacher mentioning to me about his current inability to hold a pencil properly I noticed him trying to write with his Right hand. I asked him why and he said because maybe it would be easier to grip, and all of his friends do it that way. This broke my heart - I want my son to feel he can be whoever he is and not have to change that to meet expectations of society at aged FOUR.

I don't want my son to feel pressured academically, or left our because his food is not processed and bad for him.

So - my partner mentioned steiner to me. I looked into steiner schools and I had a visit on Friday. I was blown away, almost emotional at how perfect it is for us, how we parent, and for my son.

He's next in line for admissions. However, since my visit I've started to do more research and I am only seeing very conflicted views on the steiner education. I am at a loss on a decision. We are not wealthy, or even middle class. We get by. & by sending him to steiner school we'd be scraping the coins together - but I feel for an education whuch is relaxed, non-pressured, and with outstanding end results that it would be worth it. But I need to be sure, 100 percent sure almost.

So I'm looking for your views, experiences, advice so I can have as much information as possible to base my decision upon. This is a very big decision for me, this is my sons future and well-being. I know there are bad experiences, but 95% of the people I know had bad experiences with state funded schools included myself! So how can it be worse than that? The whole 'processed pea' tarred with the same brush state education system.

All views welcome

You say you want to avoid rat race but you seem to be constantly comparing him to other children at school, why does it matter what others eat or how many words they can read? Relax, let your son get used to school and try not to worry what the other kids are doing. I don't think the answer is Steiner I think it's you taking a more chilled approach that would help. Your son is younger than some but there will be others younger than him. Let him grow into school, speak to the teacher if you are concerned and give him the odd day off, attendance isn't compulsory at his age. and if you think writing in a reading diary is too much, Steiner expect a much higher level if parental involvement....

OP I can't comment specifically on Steiner (I'm afraid that what I have heard generally has put me off) - but will just say that you need to do what you think is best for your son. If he is unhappy at his current school, and you think the Steiner school would be a better fit - then go for it. Just keep his progress under review and if you think he is not progressing as he should, be prepared to move him out.

Maybe your son would be happier at a Steiner school- if you insist on restricting his lifestyle to such an extent he is less likely to feel left out somewhere like that. I think it might be a good call. There are good and bad steiners like all schools though. I know nothing about individual ones but definitely research carefully.

I beg to differ however that you have done 'extensive' research if you have concluded against vaccination and conventional medicine full stop. Surely everything has to be considered on its individual merits. It worried me that a blanket conclusion could have dangerous consequences. I appreciate you have had a bad experience but please ensure your research comes from unbiased sources :(

Be worthy - I think pretty much every parent wants their child to be happy and successful in life and their chosen field, and to have choices in order to have the life that they wish or. Whilst you and your partner sound like you have made a success of your limited education, sadly this is not the same for all. Our country employment is largely based on academic results, and the quantity and quality of those results. Without a good handful of GCSEs, A levels and degree you are limited and certain careers etc would be out of reach. If your child was to follow a creative route that might work regardless, but what if he wants to be a doctor, a lawyer etc? I think from my research of Steiner it is likely to be harder or him in the long run. While he is a child now with needs that are maybe not being reflected in his state education at present, can you honestly be confident that Steiner will give him the education through to 16-17 for him to be a man to make choices that will affect his life?

Lastly, I note from the Ofsted website that the Last report for BSS was in 2007, have you read it? It's quite a decent appraisal.

"Despite not putting pressure on, the school gets very good exam results and has a relatively high number of Oxbridge alumni."

Really? Tell me more.........

The majority of comments seem to be talking about my sons diet and vaccinations?? And are making assumptions about my lifestyle? I've never once stated I am against children's vaccinations he had them up until two but then due to his test results it was a worry for ALL that the vaccinations would do him more harm than good AT THIS MOMENT. There are some times where vaccination ingredients can be more harmful than helpful to a child. When he is healthier we will then make a decision. Apparently I restrict my sons lifestyle to an extent ? Seriously? What because he has organic food and no chemicals and at the moment can't have immunisations? REALLY? That's really restricting his lifestyle!? Unless you've been In the same position as my family I don't see how you can make such hurtful judgements this is my son we are talking about - all I wanted was advice on Steiner schools, I am genuinely upset by some peoples attitudes. I have definitely not constantly compared my child
To other children someone asked about his reading and homework and I spoke about that. You seem to have taken a very tiny snippet of my life and thrown as much judgments and assumptions in to my conversation as possible. I am more than aware that children pick up on things!! You do not see my school runs or how I take my child to school or the attitude I display regarding school and my son. I like his teacher, I like the headmaster and I chose the school because I liked it. So I have not projected negative influence on to my son thank you. He has clearly shown that he was not quite ready for school and he is still very emotional about it. So I looked at other options and wanted advice. I have not said I will take him out I have not said he will go to steiner and visa versa I just wanted advice in making that decision. That is all. Yes I've read the report, I know sometimes we need a levels and so on, steiner does not mean he will not have enough GCSEs for further education and it also does not mean that once he's older and thinks abit more about his future we can decide what to do then, he can go to college for further GCSEs like I said before or he can leave stiener if he wanted. These are not my concerns - these are things that are easily dealt with. My concerns are stated in my OP. I want to know if Bristol stiener school religiously reflects and practices the views of stiener himself from the 1930s because if it does then he wouldn't go.

I'm not sure about avoiding the rat race, some ex pupils at my daughter's school recently set up their own accountancy firm.

Not that there's anything wrong with being an accountant, but it's probably not a career that some less-informed people might associate with those who have been Steiner-educated.

Me and my partner are in recruitment and marketing. We own are own business also, so i think earlier comments about me wanting him to avoid the rat race were based upon misinterpertaion of me saying i don't want him to just feel as if he has to work work work to pay mortgage and debts. I can see how maybe this sounded as 'avoiding the rat race' But all i really meant was I want him to be happy, most importantly and enjoy the things in this world that life is really all about and have the time to be the creative child he is.

Leave him where he is and give him more of a chance to settle. Review next year.

Your son's diet is obviously very important to you; but you know - organic and no sugar; he's really not likely to be standing out like a sort thumb at school for this reason alone.

My kids have never been offered coke and candy floss at school
He hardly sits at a desk all day in Reception, either...
He sounds an ideal candidate for home schooling to me.

FloggingMolly - Has your child never made caked of refined sugars and icing and colours in class? Mine has - and then he's not allowed to eat it. So this is what I mean about potentially feeling LEFT out, never said STAND out.

Also yes i do believe he's an ideal candidate for home schooling but I can not afford to do that at the moment.

Maybe you are right givemeaclue. I will call them as I'm not sure if i decline an offer if i will be given another

OP has valid medical reasons for her son's diet. My DD's best friend has type 1 diabetes and the kids at her school are all fine about it. TBH there are so many different food allergies and restrictions for different children now that they just don't see it as strange. DS1's best friend is a vegetarian so often can't have stuff they've made or that gets handed out for birthdays eg Haribo. He just has a small supply in school of things that are ok and the teacher gives him one of those instead.

If you want to PM me I could probably recommend schools in Bristol based on the kind of thing you're looking for. It may be worth visiting ones that are better at dealing with 'quirky' kids. Not sure that's the right word but hopefully you know what I mean. It's also much easier if you're around like minded parents .

ShriekingGnawer thank you very much and i will private messege you. I have decided against stiener for now, I have way too many questions that can't be answered even by the school itself and I have heard good things, but too many negatives to feel secure enough.

I like the idea, a lot. And I think the idea sells. People are looking to alternatives and a place where children can be more creative and individual without feeling insecure. But I think stiener do kind of steer more towards a 'religious' type of school with following steiner 'values'. Although it may not be true and some stories may be exaggerated regarding stiener,the majority view on stiener is negative - so i worry with having stiener school on his CV it may cause him troubles in the future also, especially with some people regarding it as a cult and spreading this view.

I've seen schools based on Human scale education and free schools which seem to be more of the middle ground I'm looking for, but i haven't seen any in my area when searching.

I spent a couple of years in a Camphill community which are based on Steiner principals. This is a commune type set-up supporting people with disabilities. As a commune dwelling hippy type I am pretty broad minded, however quiet simply anthroposophy is weird and cult like . I also found this approach to be remarkably joyless and repetitive, and as for eurhythmy and all that harp playing ,extremely odd doesn't come close.
Basically, for a philosophy that states it is so child-centred it is incredibly rigid. As a teacher now (primary) I can hand on heart say ,children get a more child-centred education in an average primary than they get in a Steiner school, and I have been in a quite a few of both.

Thank feeling dizzy that is very helpful I think I have made my decision as far as Steiner is concerned x

I think it's admirable that you are looking out for your son and totally understandable he is not ready for school at four.

Another option not mentioned here is sending him to a full-time private nursery for the rest of this school year - montessori could be for you. He does not legally have to be recieving full time education until the beginning of the term after he turns five.

Ps I hope you don't mind me asking but has your son ever been tested for coeliac disease while he has been consuming gluten?

OP - you at getting a bit of a hard time on here and I'm sorry. But just consider, did you think that saying "I personally feel AT THE MOMENT that state schools just create processed pea cash cows to use within society to make themselves richer." about the schools most of us send put children to is likely to produce a sympathetic reaction?

My DD has had the exact same ongoing illness, blood tests for lymphoma here too, thankfully negative. All lymph nodes on body swollen, high temperatures, night sweats, lethargy, but also limb pain, tummy ache, nose bleeds, persistent cough.
Did they test for TB in Bristol? We had that too but perhaps because we were in London. Might be worth checking.
DD's tests all came back negative anyway and we were just sent off with "unknown lingering virus". Who told you your son was at high risk of cancer and to change his diet? DD is at a normal school incidentally but has to have a few days off every month when she sleeps all day and all night when having one of her episodes!

I know this is off topic but I was surprised to see someone describe very similar health problems!

She is five and a half now by the way and has had this health problem since she was almost four.

Ragusa - I wish I knew all of this before September - I would have kept him out a year - with him being August born it would have given him a whole year to get ready for school. Im surprised admissions don't tell you this, or even the nursery he was going to - i would have definately of done this. However, i feel doing this now would be very confusing.. If only we could have a sneak peak of the future lol.

Curlew - this was not an attack on people who send their children to state schools. I have 8 neices and nephews in state schools and i decided to put my son into one. This was more of a comment on the system and our children not being able to be treated as individualy because unfortunately the teachers just do not have the time for that - they have a lot to do. I've had a hard time watching my son struggle enourmously to settle but the teachers not having the time to tell me how he did at the end of the day - It's hard when your child in your eyes is still very young and someone who see's them more than you cannot tell you about their day - they just have too many kids.

MishMashofStyles I have met some people who's children suffer the same as my son but they are few and far between. It is a scary and daunting medical process and most doctors throw the towel in because they just don't have an answer. This is why we had to go private as it was all very worrying and everyone seemed to 'give up' in a sense and it's horrible when you see your child so ill, so regulalry without a rhyme or reason and you don't know what you can do to help.

I'm more than happy to talk to you and I can put you in contact with someone who will be able to refer you to a private clinic for diagnosis and hopefully give you some information and a plan to help things get better.

Whenever my son end up in A+E they look in his ears, throught, tummy, all clear - and they just say 'its a virus' But there is no virus....

Does your child's illness have a name?

And honestly, beworthy, you did say that state schools produce "processed pea cash cows". Which, while a little obscure, does not sound like a good thing to be........

Curlew - what is your reson for persuing this argument? I do believe that the government want us to bring them in money, they care more about this than our well being or health, our illnesses generate a lot of cash - they give us debts and mortgages where the money doesn't even exist in the first place - I feel that we live in a society that tells us we make our own decisions and choices but in practice that really is not true, and our children unfortunaltey become products of this materialist world, even mine. - This is my opinion, you have the right to not agree - but I don't see the point in persuing this on the thread achieves other than a disagreement with no end. X

"Anthroposophy teaches that Negroes [sic] are at a baby stage of development, Asians are at an adolescent stage, and only whites are adults; it also teaches that while an individual's potential may be limited by his race, an individual's soul will reincarnate many times throughout the races. Steiner lectured in Germany, 1922: "If the blonds and blue-eyed people die out, the human race will become increasingly dense if men do not arrive at a form of intelligence that is independent of blondness."