Taking ds 12 out of school for 2 mths to go to New Zealand

[Piffle]

Exp wants to take ds to NZ to visit his aging mother who can no longer travel and to attend two family weddings, Exp has 2 mths work line dup in NZ too (he is a music therapy teacher)
The options are
Leaving nov 30 2006

DS returning as unaccompanied minor for start of term after xmas

ds returning on jan 15th with my brother who is also coming over.

ds staying the whole 2 mths, keeping up his study while over there.
ds not going
DP is handling the asking of the school (boys secondary GRammar) - I pose no objections to any of the above scenarios
He's 12 he's bright and he will make up the work and his education will not suffer.
I am very worried however that the school cannot authorise that kidn of absence and thus if ds did go he would lose his school place and be regarded as a truant.
Anyone care to float some criticism - constructive or otherwise about what could happen?

I still feel its worth remembering how short the formal school years are compared to the rest of one's life

The problem is that his paternal grandmother is seriously fading. Exp is hoping to heal some of the family rift before she dies, so he HAS to go then as it's xmas and it the only time any of them agree to be together at one time as they all live all over and are very busy (5 kids and they have kids)
The other issue is, that the very good co ed comp here is also over subscribed, so he would be unlikely to get in there either.
It is gutting. I might appeal to the governors.
Woudl I write straight to the governors secretary?

What could the school do if he officially left for the 10 days and then exp sent a doctor's certificate from New Zealand by fax stating that ds was ill and unfit to travel?

In the light of your queries, they'll guess it may not be the truth, but what could they do about it?

Hmmm Piffle, see your point about ds's grandmother.
Wonder if schools offer such a thing as "compassionate" absence , like compassionate leave in some jobs?

You really don't want ds to be deregistered whilst he's away.

I remember an article in the Telegraph a few years ago where a mother took her child skiing during term-time and phoned up the school every morning on her mobile from the top of a mountain to say the child was ill

Am always against implicating a child in such a scheme.

An appeal to the school governors on compassionate grounds is probably your best hope?

Could you really lose his place at the school for such a compassionate visit? I can't beleive the school would be so calous and short minded. Surely they have an interest in turning out well rounded individuals, which can only be reinforced through such an experience as extended family contact and travel. Its hardly like he's on a regular 2-week holiday jaunt skiing, or on a beach in Benidorm or whatever. I'd arrange to meet the head and have a chat.

Message withdrawn

we did move 250 miles from Hants to Lincs to get him into a decent school as we could not afford private schooling which we were told he would be best off with due to his abilities...
A lot depends on hos exps' mum is in the next few months, if she deteriorates after an op in October then sod the school he is going.
He at some point would also have to go over if she died, that might not be at such a convenient time for the school.
I'll talk to exp about appealing to the governors...

Exp asked again with some revised dates, it means ds now leaving a few days later and flying there and back as unaccompanied minor, we asked for an extra 4 days on top of the 10 and the head has agreed
We are happy now!

That's good news. Considering that he'll have considerable jet-lag too both ways, a short trip is heavy going.

we have factored in the jet lag on his return he is returning on a friday, giving him time to recuperate a little

Well done sorting it all out. Bet he'll have a great time. How are you going to manage without him for 14 days? Feel funny about it at all?

I'll be 7 mths pregnant by xmas, dd will be keeping me and dp busy, DS often spends large chunks of time in Europe etc with exp so we're used to it, must admit the whole unaccompanied minor thing is a little to me, but I know the airlines do a terrific job and he is a sensible lad.
I'm thrilled for him above all else.
He will be gone for over 3 weeks with the school xmas break and his time either side of that.

Fantastic News Piffle!

That's great that you've found a mutual compromise without upsetting the school!

I'm sure your ds will be fine flying unaccompanied: he'll probably be spoiled rotten by the flight attendants.