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Original poster

Really angry at DS' teacher (long)

53 replies

Poshpaws · 03/02/2006 16:27

Was waiting in the playground this afteroon, chatting to a few other mums, when the kids came out one by one from the classroom.

The teacher checks to see if she can see the parent/carer before letting the child go. Anyway, she had DS1 and then she saw me. However, before she let him go, she shouted across the playground' Could you please teach him how to do up his zip over the weekend'. This was followed by a smile, but the tone in her voice was exasperation. All I could think to say at the time was 'Oh, ok'. The other mothers were shocked at her approach and it wasn't until I was walking home that I actually became really angry about it.

DS1 is not 4.5 yet and started Rception 3 weeks ago. DH and I have tried on a number of occasions to teach him to do up his zip but to no avail. However, what really got me was that she didn't call me over and tell me, she shouted across the playground. Also, there were a number of children running out of the classroom without their coats done up.

I understand that it must be a pain if a child is coming up to ask you to do his zip up each time he goes out, but I assume he doesn't, as this is the first time that his coat had been done up prior to him leaving the classroom. Normally I do it.

Anyway, it is parents' evening next Wednesday - should I complain about her attitude then or before.

Thanks

OP posts:
Feistybird · 03/02/2006 16:36

Tbh, I wouldn't complain at all. I think you're being oversensitive - it's not like she called 'can you teach him to wipe his bum'.

My reaction would be an attempt to teach him to do his zip over the weekend.

waterfalls · 03/02/2006 16:38

It would go right over my head to be honest, I would'nt give it a second thought.

iota · 03/02/2006 16:40

my top p would be t get ds1 a jacket that has velco as well as a zip - they find it very easy to press the velcro together and it is quite effective at holding the coat shut

Original poster
Poshpaws · 03/02/2006 16:45

Funnily enough, iota, he does have a coat with a zip and velcro - but he doesn't like it.

Feisty - not sure how I am being oversensitive. I don't like someone shouting at me rather than calling me over to talk to me. That is the issue I have, not the zip. But each to their own, I suppose.

OP posts:
edam · 03/02/2006 16:51

If she's used to having to control a noisy class of what, 30 children, perhaps she's used to having to shout across a room to get one person's attention? Yes, it is rude, but I can see how it might slip out. I'd just have a friendly word with her at parents' evening and say you found it a bit rude and would appreciate it if she could come over if there's something she'd like to say to you.

doormat · 03/02/2006 16:52

poshpaws I would have a quiet word about it

ever thought of buying him pull-up school trousers that have no zip.

Avalon · 03/02/2006 16:53

Poshpaws - I don't think I'd complain about her attitude, but I would mention it at parents' evening. 'I was upset when you shouted..' etc.

She could have come over to you.
She could have asked ds to ask you to go over to her.
She could have put a note in his reading bag.

Unnecessary on her part, maybe she was tired and frustrated.

Original poster
Poshpaws · 03/02/2006 16:54

Thanks, edam, for seeing how I can perceive this as rudeness. TBH, other mothers have had run-ins with this teacher, so maybe it is about how she interacts with people/pupils.

OP posts:
Original poster
Poshpaws · 03/02/2006 16:55

Thanks, Avalon and Doormat. Doormat, it was his coat she was referring to, not trousers

OP posts:
Feistybird · 03/02/2006 16:56

I don't get it - why is it rude?

You said yourself she smiled when she called over to you.

mszebra · 03/02/2006 16:56

I think she could have been more tactful, BUT she's busy, she's trying to handle many kids at once, it's Friday & everyoen is a bit tired on Friday, and having helped out in DS1's class I can understand how aggravating it is to deal with many kids who expect you to help put their hair ties back in, help get dressed, etc.

So I guess I would ask her not to shout across playground next time, but just leave it otherwise.

doormat · 03/02/2006 16:56

Sorry pops (embarrassed emoticon)
LOL

Jennypog · 03/02/2006 16:56

Whenever I have a problem with my child's teacher I am always very careful about going in and complaining. Mainly because that person that you are complaining about is going to be in sole charge of your dear little one and we are all human even teachers. I used to think that all teachers loved children, but my view has definitely changed over the years with the experience of meeting so many. Unless it is a real serious issue, I would treat it as water under the bridge.

Original poster
Poshpaws · 03/02/2006 16:57

She smiled after she had mentioned it. Her voice had a tone of exasperation and I think she smiled to temper that.

OP posts:
iota · 03/02/2006 16:57

If she was standing in the doorway supervising the release of the children, she would NOT have been able to leave her post to come over to Poshpaws, and she probably did it on the spur of the moment and wouldn't have had a chance to writre a note for teh bookbag

LIZS · 03/02/2006 16:58

Agree with edam - better to say something casually about how you'd prefer her to speak to you one ot one next time at parent's evenign than to make a big things of it. dd is almost the same age and can't do her zip, although she can pull it up if started off. It's a regulation coat and has press studs as well which she equally can't manage. They all queue up to come out of the classroom at breaktime and each one is checked and zipped as required. Not an issue as far as I know.

Original poster
Poshpaws · 03/02/2006 16:59

Can see where you are coming from Jennypog. That is why I am glad that I didn't have a knee-jerk reaction when she shouted over. Didn't want to scupper(sp?) relations .

Shall mention it at parents evening from a much calmer perspective.

OP posts:
Feistybird · 03/02/2006 17:00

So, the teacher is expected to know the parent/childminder/granny of every child, to ensure the child has seen the picker-upper and vice-versa. She knows your child well enough to remember to speak to you about a specific issue...

But you're complaining.

Blimey, so glad I'm not a teacher.

edam · 03/02/2006 17:01

Well, if she couldn't come over to the person she wanted to address, she shouldn't have said anything. Shouting is just plain rude and not a good example to set. Although none of us is perfect etc. etc. Can see how it would happen without the person intending to be rude. But good to mention it as she probably hasn't realised that it might put someone's back up.

Feistybird · 03/02/2006 17:02

But Edam how could she come over? She has a line of kids to sort out.

TambaTheTemptress · 03/02/2006 17:03

I wouldnt have thought anything of it.....

Mad to complain over something so trivial!

Original poster
Poshpaws · 03/02/2006 17:03

Feisty, she didn't speak to me, she shouted, as I have previously stated. If she had called me over and spoken to me, I would not have started this theead .

Anyway, that's by the by and I shall speak to her at parents' evening.

OP posts:
Original poster
Poshpaws · 03/02/2006 17:05

Tamba, I personally don't think it's mad to expect to be spoken to properly. But as I said before, each to their own.

OP posts:
Feistybird · 03/02/2006 17:08

I think you're mad.

iota · 03/02/2006 17:09

If she had shouted over to you something positive like "ds1 came top of the class in reading today" would you still have thought that she's been rudely shouting?