Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Education

Join the discussion on our Education forum.

Would you move in my situation?

31 replies

onthemoveyetagain · 23/11/2011 23:30

Hi there,

I really need some other people's advice on this one - going round and round in circles in my mind.

To cut a long story short, my 6 year old boy is a sensitive soul. He absolutely hated the private pre-prep we put it in and still has nightmares about the place even though he left over a year ago. We took him out and put him in a state school which he absolutely adored. The children and staff were so friendly unlike the private school which he claimed was unfriendly, gloomy and dark. Unfortunately, we had to leave the school he loved as we were given an opportunity in the Netherlands which we would have been mad to have turned down. Some will probably think that is selfish but that is another story and we had to come over here for several good reasons for our family.

My little boy has made me promise that any school he goes to now is "bright, cheeful and where everyone is friendly". We looked at one school and it was very much like his hated school in appearance - small, victorian building, dark. My son immediately said he didn't want to go there. So, we looked at another school which would entail a 1 and a half hour commute for my husband instead of 20 minutes. We also don't like the city half as much as where we are. BUT: my son loved the school. It is bright, cheerful, nice and airy, huge grassy woods and playgrounds. He immediately wanted to go there. We are trying hard to find a house to rent over there so he can go to the school he likes. Apart from the long commute and the fact we don't like the area as much, I also revisited the school yesterday for a second time. This time I took note of the teachers who would probably be teaching him and they just were not so warm. One teacher told us it wasn't a good time to speak to us. The Head was also not so warm but ok. The playground was amazing as before and the building was beautiful. Today, we revisited the first school where we live. This time, we liked it a lot more. The place is quite dark and very small and the playground is pretty non-existent. My son loved playing in his old playground in the woods and I know this is one of the major things he likes about the other school. BUT, I really liked the teachers in his year - they were so friendly. The Head was also wonderful with my son, so kind to him and really looked after him during our tour.

I am now so confused as to which school to go to. Should we move to an area that we don't like so much, triples my husband's commute to work - but has a school which my little boy likes. He said this school has a happiness factor of 7, but the other school only seems to be about 5. But he didn't notice the coldness of two teachers (albeit in an overall very friendly school). This school also has the huge range of resources and great playground. Or should we go to the school which looks so like the one he hates, is so small and has no playground really. BUT where the teachers in his year and the Head seem lovely - perhaps it is a different school to the one he hated even though in looks it seems so similar? We would also be able to stay in the area we are in at the moment.

Moving is no problem as we are only in a short-term apartment whilst we sort this one out.

Tonight, when I put my son to bed he said he found the school today a bit gloomy and really liked the other brighter one. But surely it is the teacher and Head that make a school more happy and bright/not the building?

Thank you for letting me brainstorm my thoughts. I would so appreciate any opinions on what you would do.

OP posts:
sashh · 28/11/2011 03:54

I was going to say the local school until I saw that you had promised him a bright school. Promises are incredibly serious whn you are 6.

I would also look at Dutch school - he is 6, he can miss six months education and catch up so six months in a dutch school could be an adventure, and he will pick up the language.

onthemoveyetagain · 28/11/2011 20:40

Thanks for the thoughts - appreciated. We are almost certainly going to go with the school here. My son is totally ok with the idea and really liked the headteacher. The headteacher even emailed him a personal email which has won my son over. I have also been told it will be possible to have the lovely teacher we met when we looked around. It also means we can stay here which is the area he much prefers. Sergeant Milko - I totally agree with you - results are of profound importance. However, as we are only here until the end of the academic year I am more anxious that he will be happy. When we go back to England the search will really focus on results.

As regards the brightness, I have told my son I will get involved as a supply teacher/parent and work hard to make the playground and environment a lot brighter. The Head also wrote back and told my son they are having the playground totally changed at Christmas because he also agrees that it is too dark. Not bad support for a busy headteacher! Will see how things go but this feels like the right decision. Thanks so much for your help - it really helped!

OP posts:
CarrotsAreNotTheOnlyVegetables · 29/11/2011 08:50

Sounds great - I think you have definitely made the right decision.

Lots of luck to your DS with his new school!

soandsosmummy · 02/12/2011 19:53

Are these private schools? If so take a look at the Dutch state school system from all I've heard you may be very pleasantly surprised I was in Amsterdam in the summer so the schools weren't open but our b&b over looked a school and the play ground was beautiful - I also went to look through the window and the layout was so different from any English school I've seen - colourful, books all over the place, - I couldnt put my finger on it but so obviously child centred and a fun happy place to be

soandsosmummy · 02/12/2011 19:56

sorry missed your last post OP ignore me

Chandon · 08/12/2011 09:41

I would not involve my children too much in the decision.

I would choose what I would think to be the best and most suitable school for my child.

Then I would "sell" this school to him, and ask him to trust me. I would just tell him what the new school is, really.

I moved my children to a different school last year. My 6 year old was very opposed to the move, the main reason being... that he would not be allowed packed lunch in the new school! He was also worried about the school library being so big and losing school library books or not knowing where to put them Confused.

6 year olds cannot understand consequences of this kind of huge decision. The just pick on a small unimportant thing, usually.

So follow your own heart/instinct.

And then get on with it.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread