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If a school sends an accident form home saying DS bumped his head...

28 replies

Caligyulea · 18/12/2005 15:03

... would you be surprised if when asked about it, he said "Windupia pushed me and banged my head against the wall"?

OP posts:
Caligyulea · 18/12/2005 15:05

Just realised that's not very clear. The accident form made no mention of the fact that the reason DS bumped his head, was because another child's hand was on it deliberately precipitating it against the wall, not accidentally as part of a game or whatever.

Is it normal for accident forms to be quite so discreet?

OP posts:
santabops · 18/12/2005 15:08

yes

They are so you are aware of the bump and can therefore be alert to the symptoms.

tensing · 18/12/2005 15:21

Yes they are always worded this way, My daughter used to come home with atlest 6 a week, and my son comes home with them a couple of times a week.

Caligyulea · 18/12/2005 15:23

So an accident form's function is not to actually tell you what happened, just to make sure you know about a particular injury? And presumably the fact that an accident may have happened as a result of bullying/ untoward behaviour etc., is a completely separate issue?

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Twiglett · 18/12/2005 15:23

yes they should be discreet

and children are IMHO fairly selective .. ie "x pushed me and banged my head against the wall" may miss out that they've been playing chase, or that the one who ended up injured started it

Caligyulea · 18/12/2005 15:24

What on earth are they doing tensing?! This is only the second one DS has had! (But I think they only send them home at his school if it has either been a head injury or if it's drawn blood - perhaps some other schools send them home every time a kid falls over or something?)

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Twiglett · 18/12/2005 15:25

not saying your DS was lying or that he isn't being bullied IYSWIM

Caligyulea · 18/12/2005 15:31

Not sure if it's bullying exactly. Unfortunately he's got slightly closer to a really annoying girl who I'll call Windupia because the sole purpose of her life, it seems to me, is to wind other children up to an hysterical frenzy. I was warned by other parents about having her over for a playdate, but would I listen? Oh no, I thought, FGS, how much trouble can she be, she's six. And of course, now that she's been over, she's decided that DS is her friend. Unfortunately she manifests her friendship by following the chosen friend around winding them up, which inevitably ends in one of them being bashed. This time DS, but next time it may be her, who knows. Hopefully she'll have chosen a new special friend by the time they go back after the holidays!

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collision · 18/12/2005 15:45

they will tell you like this so you can be aware of concussion and they certainly wouldnt want to put the blame on another child as it might have been just horseplay.

jac34 · 18/12/2005 16:27

Our school also sticks a sticker on the child saying,"I've bumped my head."
DS comes out of school with one quite often,I think they have given up on the accident slip, or bothering to ring me,unless it's much more serious than normal. He's so accident prone

ladymuck · 18/12/2005 16:30

Our school has a standard head injury letter (we're waiting to see what other standard letter exist), but the only spaces are for date, name of child and a signature - defintley no room for givign a description. But usually the teachers are fairly coy about naming other children anyway ime, though you can pick up a lot from their body language!

singersgirl · 18/12/2005 16:45

I've not had an injury form from the school, but I had to collect DS2 early last week because "he hit his head on the cloakroom wall". I mentioned to another teacher I knew on the way out that apparently DS2 had thrown himself against the cloakroom wall, and DS2 piped up "Oh no I didn't, X threw myself against the cloakroom wall". So I think it is definitely discretion. As far as I'm aware, it was all good natured horseplay in the way of 4 and 5 year old boys.

Bugsy2 · 18/12/2005 16:56

My ds regularly comes home with these and I was a bit alarmed at first too Caligula. However, as far as I can tell, the purpose of the form is just to alert you to an injury that you may need to keep an eye on, as opposed to a sore knee.

PeachyPlumFairy · 18/12/2005 17:17

I'd just be surprised to get one- are you meant to? DS2 has been badly injured enough with head / facial injuries that I've had to go collect him, but I've never seen an accident form...

hercules · 18/12/2005 17:20

I've never had an accident form but have always been informed by phone.

Shimmers · 19/12/2005 00:43

Schools out forms when kids have bumped their heads so that parents can keep an eye of child in case any unnoticeable 'damage' has been done, ie. reports of headaches etc which should then be followed up at doctors or a&e. I always speak to parents instead as I have alot of contact with my nursery parents and I let them know the circumstances. If you are more worried about how he got the bump (as I would be) do speak to the teacher to get the whole picture.

tensing · 19/12/2005 16:58

My two are very clumsy.

Rosie when she was little once managed to have two seperate incidents of books falling off bookshelfs in one day.

Henry has poor coordination, and no sense of danger so will often climb on things or fall over for no real reason, also he does walk, just runs everywhere.

golds · 19/12/2005 17:39

I work at lunchtimes at my ds school, I was on medical last week - yes we have to be dscreet, quite often the person on medical is not the person in the playground and did not see the incident, also unless witnessed, you can't make aqusations (sp?) about who did what.

Somethimg happend in our school last week, I notified the teacher and left her to deal with it, she sorted it out by speaking to the two concerned and hopefully it won't reaccur, but if it did, then would be the time to involve the parents.

Tommy · 19/12/2005 17:45

my DS came home with a sticker saying he'd bumped his head and that the classroom assistant had out a cold compress on it. When we got home he told me that the classroom assistant had bumped his head on the gate
Mind you - I shut his fingers in the car door today so I can't really say anything...

SantaClausFrau · 19/12/2005 17:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shimmers · 19/12/2005 23:51

Parents aren't given names of kids that have bitten, hit etc. by other kids becuase what tends to happen with some kids is that they can become labelled as 'naughty' kids by some parents and some parents tell their kids to actually avoid them. With young children, I think that instead of avoiding, we as teachers need to give/show the kids what good behaviour is about. As parents it is very upsetting (I have struggled with my teacher and parent of a toddler hat) but lot of hitting etc. is part and parcel of being a toddler as they stuggler to find their feet and independence. Alot of these incidents happen when kids want the same toy so as a teacher I try to instill a good sense of sharing, and make sure that each child knows that even if they don't get to play with a toy first, that they WILL have a turn. Kids usually work things out and become friends again. We also have a daily circle time where we talk about good behaviour and how we can be kind to be eachother.
In my first year of nursery teaching, I had a few really nasty parents who would actually say really mean things about some of the kids in the class. Some kids would say, 'my mum saids you're mean and I shouldn't play with you', which was so sad. The kids who were saying mean things as a result of waht their parents had said to them, were in my opinion, harder to 'reach' than the kids who would naturally and instinctively hit out if they wanted something.

I think that the parents of children who hurt others, SHOULD however be informed that they have hurt another child so that they can be kept in check of how their child is doing developmentally and know how they and I can support the child's learning and physical and social development. Sometimes as we all know, these incidents are one offs and other times, not so.

At my child's nursery, a child scratched him so badly that he still has a scar(now faint but still there) over a year later. When I asked if the parent had be informed they said no. I was very angry as the child's nails must have been very long to make such a tear. In the end, the nursery decided to change the policy and inform parents and needless to say they said that the child's nails had indeed been very long!

I would say that if incidents persist, rather than asking who the child is, ask if the incidents have involved the same child and if so ask how the nursery plans to avoid these accidents happening. Maybe they could monitor the child very carefully and redirect him or her before any other accidents are likely to occur.

Sorry for the long post! It is a hard and emotional issue.

Shimmers · 19/12/2005 23:54

Sorry, just read post and see a few midnight typos! Back to school for me!!!!!

Shimmers · 19/12/2005 23:55

Parents aren't given names of kids that have bitten, hit etc. by other kids becuase what tends to happen with some kids is that they can become labelled as 'naughty' kids by some parents and some parents tell their kids to actually avoid them. With young children, I think that instead of avoiding, we as teachers need to give/show the kids what good behaviour is about. As parents it is very upsetting (I have struggled with my teacher and parent of a toddler hat) but lot of hitting etc. is part and parcel of being a toddler as they stuggler to find their feet and independence. Alot of these incidents happen when kids want the same toy so as a teacher I try to instill a good sense of sharing, and make sure that each child knows that even if they don't get to play with a toy first, that they WILL have a turn. Kids usually work things out and become friends again. We also have a daily circle time where we talk about good behaviour and how we can be kind to be eachother.
In my first year of nursery teaching, I had a few really nasty parents who would actually say really mean things about some of the kids in the class. Some kids would say, 'my mum saids you're mean and I shouldn't play with you', which was so sad. The kids who were saying mean things as a result of waht their parents had said to them, were in my opinion, harder to 'reach' than the kids who would naturally and instinctively hit out if they wanted something.

I think that the parents of children who hurt others, SHOULD however be informed that they have hurt another child so that they can be kept in check of how their child is doing developmentally and know how they and I can support the child's learning and physical and social development. Sometimes as we all know, these incidents are one offs and other times, not so.

At my child's nursery, a child scratched him so badly that he still has a scar(now faint but still there) over a year later. When I asked if the parent had be informed they said no. I was very angry as the child's nails must have been very long to make such a tear. In the end, the nursery decided to change the policy and inform parents and needless to say they said that the child's nails had indeed been very long!

I would say that if incidents persist, rather than asking who the child is, ask if the incidents have involved the same child and if so ask how the nursery plans to avoid these accidents happening. Maybe they could monitor the child very carefully and redirect him or her before any other accidents are likely to occur.

Sorry for the long post! It is a hard and emotional issue.

blueshoes · 20/12/2005 21:21

Shimmers, thanks for taking the time to write your post. i Dd has just joined the ranks of "naughty" toddlers in nursery and I am struggling to understand why - reading your take on it was v. helpful.

deegingemerrilyonward · 20/12/2005 21:27

Shimmers, as the mother of a sometimes "naughty" child, and child who has things done to him, I really took a lot from your post.

We as mothers do try to influence who our children play with, and never want to think of ours as being labelled.

Thank you