DD got another Red letter today; why don't the school realise how upsetting it is?

[KatyMac]

DD has uncontrolled asthma atm (has had for 3-5 years)

She sees the asthma nurse 4 weekly & the hospital 4 monthly
She is on a shed load of medication

She has had time off school; she will have more time off school, this term probably, year definitely.

So they send a letter home says her attendance is unacceptable & will affect her long term performance

Um we know
She comes to school & gets set home poorly

She can't actually control her chest infections/asthma

How is she going to feel about being told off informed of this?

Don't show it to her. They are going through the prescribed motions. She has had a rough time, so don't make it worse. Ring school and have what I am sure is yet another word about it. As long as the EWO knows what is going on, then there is no problem. Presumably, if she were to be hospitalised, they would send much the same letters? If so, ignore, you know you are doing all you can.

I can for today, but tomorrow when everyone is taking about what colour they got; what do I say then?

it's life. she knows she misses school. at our school the kids with perfect attendance get entered into a prize draw for a bike. dd2 has cp and misses school for therapy. she is never in the draw. dd1 misses school for orthodontic appointments. (we live an hour away from the orthodintist and the last appt is at 3). she is never in the draw. this sort of stuff is nonsense, but it will be a 5 minute wonder. the next day they will be talking about something else.

there's nothing she can do about it, or yu, so you need to be keeping the stress of it down for her sake. don't let her dwell on it. you both know she doesn't have perfect attendance, for good reason. so a red letter is nothing to be ashamed of.

I know it's life

So does DD - it's not shame (at least I hope it isn't) more despondency

I think it's because there is no recognition that she comes in when she is ill, that she manages

That her lung capacity is about 60% and it's a real effort to get up in the morning & go to school

Have you spoken to your EWO about this?

Usually they send these out because they have to notify the parents that their child is currently below X% - regardless of the reason - so that you know that your child's attendance is being monitored.

They don't only use the attendance info to beat you with - it can be used to try and put any necessary support in place as well (eg work sent home when DD is off for long periods to do when she feels up to it, to stop her falling behind)

:)

That would be when they threatened us with court

Despite us sending letter/hosp appointments etc

& getting work out of them is a bit in yr 7 they sent GCSE music workbook

Maybe DD & I take it too personally

How about saying that it's red "because the school are silly and haven't taken into account illness"

Twats.

That's pants. Poor dd. I remember she's been through an awful lot (not just asthma).

You may be fed up of complaining but I'd contact the head (no doubt again) to reinforce how distressing this is for dd and how much effort she makes to attend even when she's ill. And if the head isn't terribly apologetic, then the governors. No child should feel harassed or criticised for being ill.

hiya Katymac,

how else are you supposed to take it, when its written down and in your face every bloody time.

I guess you just accept they are going to get these letters. It sucks, it's ok that it's what they are 'supposed to do' but when you are a tired mum with a tired kid and there's no end to a childs illness it's a bloody reminder you don't need.

i know you know of me on here and dd's health probs, i sympathise. I have even been looking into home education as there is just such lack of support in rl form our school, however well meaning and informative these letters are, for us (yeah right) or is it for the 'system'.

have a from me x

schools are very low on my list of faves atm too. i want to fuck off and live in a yurt in the middle of nowhere!!!

Actually if you do complain it may be worth pointing out this conflicts with the Every Child Matters outcomes.

What are these letters? Do they come from Norfolk County Council or the school? My dd has never had one to my knowledge. Your dd is at High School?

whats that Edam? the Every child counts matters?

If i were you Katymac i would take a strip of 1st class stamps to the office and say 'here you are could you kindly post them to me in future'

The high school send them

Fortunately they do post them - I have hidden this one from DD - which is bad because it is 'lying'

Every Child Matters is a policy that underpins all childrens' services from national government down through local, the NHS and any other public service that has anything to do with children.

The five outcomes for ECM that all schools should be working to are that every child should be able to:

* Be Healthy
* Stay Safe
* Enjoy and Achieve
* Make a Positive Contribution
* Achieve Economic Well-being

I'd say repeated letters from school (council?) harassing katy's dd for being ill are contravening 'Enjoy and achieve' and possibly 'Stay Safe' too as it's putting her under pressure to attend when she is ill.

KatyMac, you are not lying. You are protecting your DD from the insensitivity of the system.

How is it lying tho? It's protecting imo. protecting her from a ridiculously thought out official process/roundup. A system that doesn't appreciate or allow for illness.

thanks Edam btw

Blimey, I'd have thought a lot of these schools are on jolly thin ice with the Disability Discrimination Act 2005, too, which requires reasonable adjustments and that a disabled child is not treated "less favourably" (where disability can include chronic conditions).

Problem is they are usually computer generated. And they cover school's back when/if she doesn't reach Target grades. We have parents blaming us, when in reality it is no-ones fault, that child is ill.

Saying that as a teachet with a disability I still get letters about my absence.

I kind of see what you are saying practicallyimperfect but tbh the fact that DD is there despite everything she has been through is pretty important to her & to us

& she got moved into set 1 maths yesterday so she is keeping up (in everything except french/spanish which I think is genetic, dance (bizarrely) PE (no surprise there) & art)

Babylon shite it is.

grrrrrrrrrrrrr

YY dd should in fact be recognised for the efforts she makes to go into school whenever possible AND the amount of work she puts in to keep up with the curriculum despite unavoidably having to miss some lessons.

Thisisanicecage is right, these kind of letters probably do contravene the DDA when they are sent repeatedly to children with long-term/chronic illness and/or disability.

Computer generated is no excuse. Someone puts the letters in the post.