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Original poster

Going to private school open day this morning ... dh wants to go in his jeans?!

141 replies

roisin · 15/10/2005 09:42

Do you think this is OK? He actually knows some of the staff as he does assemblies for them, and tours round the church, so maybe that's why he feels quite relaxed about it.

He's not quite as convinced as I am that we need to go the private route for secondary (though he is coming round to the idea). And he has been to open evenings for the local comps in jeans, so...

OP posts:
RTKMonherBROOMSTICK · 15/10/2005 19:46

Well, they will remember him for his socks and science knowledge

Surprizing that not many parents were there

Blandmum · 15/10/2005 19:48

Whenever my kids school have a saterday open day they invite some kids in to show off how good the school is etc.

Dd was always being asked......amazingly ds is never invited [grin[

yoyo · 15/10/2005 19:51

So do they have to sit entrance tests Roisin? Not that they will have any problems - the science teacher must have been very impressed. I tried to get DD1 interested in the Periodic Table today with no joy so we are taking them to London to the Science Museum tomorrow!

paulapell · 15/10/2005 20:10

I know this is going to sound crazy, but what's the problem with public schools? I went to a public high school which was in the top 5% of the national schools, my husband went to a public grammar school, also way up there in the nationals, both have a 96-98% pass rates in the last 10 years.....so why must people insist on going private?

LIZS · 15/10/2005 20:15

oh, is this thread about to go off ....

Don't know where you are, Paula, but not everyone shares such ready access to high quality secondary education, whether their LEA operates a selective system or not.

paulapell · 15/10/2005 20:24

I know we were lucky with our schooling, but there's also a secondary modern in the same town which has only slightly lower pass rates than the schools dh and I went to, then just 5 minutes away there's a school which, according to our LEA is 'a perfectly good school' with pass rates on average 15-20%lower. You have to look around your area at all of the schools not just the one closest. I can assure you that neither of my ds's will be going to a private school and if we have to move to ensure a good education at a public school then we will. Private schools just widen the invisible class divide.

Cam · 15/10/2005 20:29

paulapell, you mean state schools don't you, public schools are even posher than private ones

Roisin does the school you looked at start at year 7?

Dd is in yr4 and her school goes up to Yr8 but I've still heard that I should be looking at senior schools now

paulapell · 15/10/2005 20:32

Yes Cam that's right, 'state' schools, though as I am a member of the public I consider myself to have attended a public school......

Just a thought though, is anyone out there actually letting their kids be kids? Or are they being, though it may be ever so gently, pushed?

Cam · 15/10/2005 20:36
paulapell · 15/10/2005 20:38
Wink
LIZS · 15/10/2005 20:38

can you define kids being kids ? I don't think all private schools fit the stereotype of hothousing anymore so than LEA ones doing SATs.

paulapell · 15/10/2005 20:44

I agree, all schools seem to be going crazy, in my area they are expected to attend reception school as soon after their 4th birthday as possible - it's more or less compulsory. And all these sports days that are non-competitive - what's all that about?

Kids being kids - well I like to think mine are kids, they are mostly filthy, playing in the gardens, going out at weekends as a family on picnics etc, playing football, baking, play fighting with dh etc, but we still make a little time to read / learn etc. Anyway life's one big lesson isn't it? What better way to learn about things than by getting out there and exploring as much as you can.

Blandmum · 15/10/2005 20:49

Ahh, that explains the difference them. I chain my kids to a desk all over the weekend and make them work on their copperplare hand writing, differential calculus, and latin, while listening to Bach.

Mine go to private school and they both get as grubby as the next kid....I've just spent ages trying to get dds clothes clean

What I don't want to do is send my kids to the local (crap) state school which is rather like the crap state school that I went to. A school in which I was bullied for wanting to work and do well. Not what I want for my kids. Good for you if you have a good state school near you, you are lucky. Not all of us are

frogs · 15/10/2005 20:58

Come back in 10 years time, Paula, when your kids have experienced the current state sector at its finest, and then we'll believe what you say.

For the record, mine are all still at state schools, but I have seen and learnt enough to know that the moral high ground looks very different when your own kids are involved.

paulapell · 15/10/2005 20:59

Point made, received and understood martianbishop. You too have healthy, happy, revoltingly filthy children - good on you..

Everyone should have access to good free schooling for their kids, and it shows that there is something badly wrong if they can't.

However from my experience, I am by no means tarring you all with the same brush, people who send their kids to private school without exploring all of the options are trying to better THEMSELVES not their kids - what better way to brag to your friends than by pointing out that you pay for your kids crappy education whilst their kids get one for free? IT'S NOT THE SCHOOLS!! IT'S THE KIDS AND THE TEACHERS!! Kids either want to learn or they don't, teachers are either good or rubbish, it doesn't matter if the school is private or state.

paulapell · 15/10/2005 21:01

Frogs, my 'moral high ground' is how I intend to bring my children up. That they are better than no-one and that no-one is better than them. Maybe if everyone did that it'd be more of any equal society?

Cam · 15/10/2005 21:06

No need to shout we're not deaf paulapell

paulapell · 15/10/2005 21:07

Eh? What?

Blandmum · 15/10/2005 21:09

Hmmm, dh and I are both quite happy with how we are thanks. I have no desire to spend reasonably large amounts of cash for simple 'snob' value. We don't have enough spare cash for that, being as I am a teacher in a state school. We don't get paid that much.

In your earlier posting you indicated that you would be prepared to send your children to a school further away if the nearest wasn't good enough, isn't that also maintaining inequality?

How would you feel if the state school you could get your kids into was full of kids who didn't want to learn? And trust me they do exsist. What would you do then?

Blandmum · 15/10/2005 21:09

It is called shouting if you type in capital letters.

Cam · 15/10/2005 21:09

ARE YOUR KIDS AT SCHOOL YET?

RTKMonherBROOMSTICK · 15/10/2005 21:13

As your son is 3.5

you may have a different view when he is 16 years

LIZS · 15/10/2005 21:16

You may well find that those who get into the selective schools are often products of private primary schools. Hope you are able to strike a balance between kids being kids and fulfilling their potential.

paulapell · 15/10/2005 21:19

martianbishop, I was lucky enough to have parents who looked around and then did the best that was available for myself and my brother, and that was to move (from our council estate to our first purchased home) just 10miles to get into the catchment area of schools with better pass rates. I will do the same. I don't believe that is promoting inequality, as they will still be attending state schools with people who's parents may be better off or worse off that their own. It's not about the schools really is it? It's about people thinking that their children are superior human beings for attending private schools, whereas the poor council house kid at the state school is looked at as though they are scum, yet they pass their GCSE's, A Levels etc with excellent passes and go on to be offered excellent places at uni, but even though they may be brighter than the private school kid, they are treated as lessers, and that's wrong isn't it? That's just my experience.

It was my group of friends and myself who were the ones who didn't want to learn, but oddly enough still did, and we've all done just fine.

I don't envy you your job though - teenagers are awful these days aren't they? Give me primary school kids any day!!

paulapell · 15/10/2005 21:21

How about we say we are all entitled to our own opinions no matter how different they are.....

As long as my kids are happy and healthy and stay that way throughout their lives I'll be happy - what more could any parent want?