should i keep my son in pre-school an extra year?

[lauran84]

My son is 3 years 10 months and has been in pre-school nursery for 6 months.I have been told on numerous occasions that my son wont be ready for school in August even though he will be 4years and 7/8months when the school year starts.

I have been told by his keyworker its because he is immature and wont sit long at ring/group time in nursery.

Has anyone else had the same advice and have they followed or refused this?

Ireally need some help.

If you are intending to send him to state school, then it's pretty much impossible to do, sorry. LEAs don't generally allow children to stay behind a year. Could he start in January?

(And I'm not sure how they can say now he won't be ready in 10 months time! Children change a tremendous amount in that period)

um, by law your child HAS to start school when he is 5. so i don't think you will be able to do it anyway

if they've literally just turned 4 you can. but they would start in Year 1 when they do go, not reception so would still be in with their peers

LOTS of boys find it hard to sit still and don't have a huge attention span.
I would ignore them!

The new school admissions code (which applies from 2011) says that if you get a reception place for your child you can defer to later in the academic year (see here). As long as your child is in education the term after he turns 5 (so Jan, I think) you'll be within the law.

But, I would question the keyworker's advice. My DD went to a lovely nursery but the children were given a lot more leeway than they would be given by a qualified reception teacher. Reception teachers have a way of getting small children (with a range of abilities and concentration spans) to behave!

you can delay his start to school and he can start in year one, but that has drawbacks

at 3 yrs 10 mths I thikn it is is fairly normal to not sit still long and concentrate

how is his keyworker tackling this, rather than just telling you he's immature and not ready?

FWIW, DD was 4 years and 6 weeks when she started reception and was absolutely fine.. reception just seemed to be a more structured version of pre school, especially the first term

I have been told i can keep him back as he is a January birthday so would only be 4years 7/8months when starting school.If i keep him back then he is going to be 5years 7/8months.

what do you think? based on the behaviour you see at home ?

bearing in mind it's november which gives several months before reception

and the disadvantages of going straight into year 1 would be huge i think

I am in Scotland so there is only one intake a year and thats August starts.

are you in Scotland?

It sounds unusual (to put it mildly) to predict school readiness on ability to sit still about a year before entry.

Did she say anything else to explain the "immature" comment?

Wee dont have reception in Scotland its pre-school then Primary 1.

His keyworker really hasnt given me much to go on apart from he is immature wont sit and doesnt join in grouptime.

I am however going to question this and find out how she can predict what my sons behavious is going to be like in 10 months time.

yes i am in Scotland x

you know, i would apply for his place anyway.

when it gets to september, if you decide he isn't ready then you don't have to use it do you?

and if he is ready then all well and good!

I have been told i've got to apply for his place anyway.So i think tbh i will go on my own judgement.

My son has been in nursery 6 months and ive have one picture i dont think he is getting the encouragement he needs if he isnt joining in etc as when i get pens,paint,plat dough,water etc out in the house he is in his element and plays for ages.So im really confused by her judgement.

Isn't the whole point of nursery to get them ready for primary school?

thats what i thought.Most kids get around a year and a half in nursery but my boy will get just over a year.

The keyworker's judgement is ludicrous.

There is nearly a year before he starts school - she ought to be able to prepare him for school during that time.

In fact, I'd be really pissed off if someone had said that about my DS. My DS is in reception at the moment, aged 4.8. He was a little behind his peers aged 3 at nursery and the nursery teacher helped him and prepared him for school and now he is flourishing. I just don't think she sounds like she is trying to help him enough.

Hmm, I'm in Scotland too. I have friends who are teachers and they would normally always say if you can delay then do, because older children always do better (but then of course they will, they're older!). However, my DH started school being complete youngest with a Feb birthday and he managed fine! Think delaying is more popular now, but that shouldn't mask the fact that immaturity can be improved upon by the staff.

It's a hard call, esp. a registration is only a month or so away now. I would be tempted to try to speak to someone more senior in the nursery: the teacher if it's a school one, the supervisor if it's a private one. He'll be v. old in the class if you keep him back, that's all. Perhaps could also ask about registering him now and then changing your mind in June...

IMO, a really good nursery won't insist a child sits down during circle time, but if circle time is engaging enough, the vast majority will want to participate.(Although new starters may want to have a nosey round the room)

It's a very long time until next September. And a huge % of his life.

There was a child at DD's nursery who couldn't sit still and nursery said that they would work on this with her and her Mum. She's fine now and loves carpet time.

My son will be 4 at the end of December, so due to start school in August too. We will be sending him. He doesnt sit still either, never does painting or anything, just plays and runs around. They are only three I think a lot goes on between 4 and 5. I know a wee boy who was kept behind and is in my sons class is very sad to be left behind and is getting very bored.

I dont think he is being encouraged to take part tbh,i have taken him to a few sports classes and the other day i was told he wouldnt join in at gym time.Its almost as if she is talking about a totally different child.

I went to the sports day at the summer and he joined in every race he waited in the line for his turn etc.

so how could he do that 4 months ago but wont join in p.e now?

I'm really thinking of movng him nurseries for the remainder of his time at pre-school.

Yes, I would keep him back. My DC are older, but the people I know who have primary aged DC that were Dec/Jan/Feb birthdays and have kept them back are very happy with their decision.

A lot of the time, especially with boys, their relative immaturity when they are the youngest in the class, is apparent further up the school - P7 and S1/2.

Sorry - I meant to say that there will be other parents keeping their children back too, so it won't necessarily mean that he'll be much older than everyone in his class.

He has 10 months before he is supposed to start school so i am going to make my own decision on how much he changes in that time.

I am being told he isnt doing things he used to do without any problems.I know his nursery is going through a hard time with personal issues so i think maybe her full attention isnt on the job.

My son has not had the best settled time at nursery.He has one teacher but she has been off quite often resulting in him being out into groups for temp periods of time and then to top it all off they have now moved to a brand new campus.

So he is going to be investigative towards a new surrounding.

Can i also ask what does DD,DC,DH etc stand for?