How do you deal with school events that you are invited to?

[OrmRenewed]

Do you always go?
Both parents?
Or do you get someone else to go just so there's a friendly face in the audience?

So far this month we have had:

DD's concert (GPs went and had to do an emergency dash to pick up DD's uke so sat and watched her bit)
DD's sports day. no-one went to that - she didn't care TBH.
DD's CAT tests at her secondary school - had to drop her and pick her up.

Next week we have:

DS#2's sports day
DS#2's play
DD's leavers assembly
DD's play
DS#1's acheivement assembly.
Inset day last day of term

I've booked 2 weeks leave in the school holidays and will need an extra ad-hoc day when we move house. Every year it's so hard to manage everything. I have taken leave for DD's last day and the inset day but the rest of it is all wing and a prayer stuff - DH trying to get there for a bit, GPs trying to get there if they can.

Do you attend everything yourself? Does it matter?

I go to virtually everything. I consider myself very lucky to be able to do so. If I couldn't go, Granny would hopefully be there.

DH goes to what he can.

I refused to go on school trips, as I think my DC need to learn how to cope with out me.

DH is taking the day off work on Tues to go on DS1's school trip. The teacher phoned DH at work to invite him. I was not invited.

One of us always goes but only sports day do we both go.

Either me or DH, or both of us will go. So far (DD just finished Y3) this has worked well.

DH has some flexibility with work, and can get away from the office for an hour or so, or going in late. I work PT (mornings only) in a school and they are really good at allowing staff time for such things - I make up my hours at other times, such as in an afternoon, etc. I deliberately chose a flexible hjob in order to be able to do so.

DD doesn't have INSET days as such, but does have longer holidays than I get (about 4 weeks more than my school). Next week she is spending 2 nights at grandparent's (they live about an hour away) and one night is haing a sleep over at her school friend's house. The other day DH is working from home for the mornin and then will drop DD off at school with me, for my last half hour.

Oh Orm you just have to do what you can.

Previously we have tried to get one of us to everything and could eg leave work half an hour early to see assembly etc.

For most of this year I was not working so saw everything!

H/ever I am now working FT in a school so it's really really hard to get time off. I was allowed the afternoon off to see DS2's last infant assembly and DS1's and DD's summer concert on the basis that I was already "booked" to see those before I started job (at short notice).

But since then I have missed DS2's open afternoon (have seen lots of his work all year anyway) and DS1 and DD's sports day. DH had the day off (for other reasons) and was going to go to sports day but it was postponed to the next day so neither of us was there.

I was really esp as DS1 won his race! (he is not at all sporty). But the DC were OK about it. Another friend told me today she was cheering them on!

Luckily leavers' plays (x 2) are both in the early evening so not too hard to get to.

Is it worth suggesting alternative timings to school? Our juniors tends to stage more things (eg Christmas plays) later which helps.

LynetteScavo - schools tend to get loads of mums volunteering for school trips, but they also need dads, especially when it comes to toilet breaks.
That's probably why they phoned and asked your DH but not you.
DC also tend to say 'Oh my mum/dad will do that for you Miss', if the teacher asks if anyones parents would be free to help with anything.