Teen Eating Issues/Disorders Support Thread 2

[myrtleWilson]

Our first thread is almost full. Here is our second - a place to seek and share advice, to lament and scream with rage and sadness, to celebrate each other's successes as we navigate the choppy waters of supporting our children with eating disorders.

All are very welcome, whether you're at the start of this journey or a more seasoned traveller.

I'll link this thread to the first one and then I thought it may be helpful if on joining this one we did a quick precis of our current situation.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/eating_disorders/4016379-teen-eating-issues-support-thread?msgid=104736115

Wow @Girliefriendlikespuppies that language sounds v encouraging as does the picking and taking a snack...
Just had a run in with DD about her kicking a ball around outside. It's so hard as her sport is late in the day and its gorgeous here and in normal times she would have spent most of the day outside....
In other news the guinea pig has put on 30g this week. We just weighed her....hoping Dds weigh in tomorrow goes as well....

Yeah it's our weigh day tomorrow as well lots 😬* 🤞🏻*

chortling at guinea pig weigh in

lougle - hope the switch back to olanzapine does the trick.
sotired sorry to hear of a weekly loss. How would your DD react to news of inpatient admission?
girlie - that does sound promising re shift in language - fingers crossed it is a sign of a wider shift..
lotts we had this we DD (volume of food) now she's eating a much wider range of food, more densely calorific the volume has decreased and we're not having to find something to meet a calorie need of 456 but without repeating one of the severely limited range of foods she would eat.

We're now four weeks into recovery - a couple of significant bumps along the way (and clearly we're not home and dry) but realistically in a very different place than we were. These threads have literally kept me going at times - I really do thank everyone.

I know we're all at different points with our respective resident ED's but happy to share how we're approaching recovery if that would be of help/interest to anyone but understand it may feel a way off yet for some (that said about 2 days before our recovery journey started I posted on this thread saying how bleak things looked so a turn around can be surprisingly rapid!)

Yes @myrtleWilson happy and interested to hear how you are approaching it. We are stuck on a limited menu eating the same things every week and very rigid (except for those 4 crisps yest).
I think all stories at whatever stage are useful...

And you are right a switch can happen quite quickly. We had a change on the food front with olanzapine almost immediately one day breakfast refusal as had happened for weeks and weeks and then the next ate it without complaining I was utterly gobsmacked... And then when we got to about 90% wfh another switch in terms of being able to cut out extra exercise (most of the time).

Glad the guinea pig is doing well!

DD1 refused snack because she wants to die anyway I was tempted to give her the olanzapine this lunchtime but thought that as she's had rispiridone this morning it might not be a great idea. So looking forward to dinner time.

So having pulled my big girl pants up and deciding to give Olanzapine a go,arranging for psychiatrist to answer loads of questions and speak to dd she has now said not a single pill will be passing her lips.🙄

@Scr1bblyGum

So having pulled my big girl pants up and deciding to give Olanzapine a go,arranging for psychiatrist to answer loads of questions and speak to dd she has now said not a single pill will be passing her lips.🙄

Well done for making the decision. Hopefully your DD will come around to the idea.

My DD refused meds. In the end we just had to say sorry hun it's not your decision you are not well.enoigh to.make that call.... same when we upped the dose..
We got some resistance to start with but just didnt take no for an answer. My daughters life depended on her eating and it was too hard for her without the meds.
It worked immediately. I am so glad we had that admittedly v difficult battle.
Good luck @Scr1bblyGum

I think that's the right decision in your dds case Scribbly.

I'd use everything you can leverage wise to get her to take it.

I'm sorry your dd is struggling so much Lougle, hopefully the olanzipine will get things back on track ASAP.

Glad you switched back to olanzapine @Lougle hopefully will increase appetite.

I’m waiting for GP to call back. He got up in the night and ate two packets of Doritos. He spent most of the day at my mums as I’m working at it’s Easter holidays but there he had a slice of toast and apple juice, then lunch was a peanut butter and jam sandwich with grape juice, mid afternoon he had a cookie his little brother baked and some more Doritos. When I got home he had 30 skittles (counted out by little brother to ensure they had an equal amount) but then he refused dinner. Said he doesn’t understand the obsession with food it’s not like not eating ever made anyone sick.

Absolutely can’t make her. Psychiatrist said “it’s your body” which is correct and DD’s view anyway. 😩It’s a tablet so couldn’t make her swallow them. To be honest it’s why we’re in this mess. With her ASC we can’t meet her head on. Dd has done loads of research. No idea how we can persuade her or make a teen who doesn’t want to take a pill take it.It’s so bloody annoying as the Easter holiday is the perfect time to do it.

I suppose it wouldn’t be ethical to give covertly. I hope you can persuade her @Scr1bblyGum

@NelleBee I honestly think with that intake you need A&E. He's probably had 700 calories today and 700 yesterday, if you count in the overnight Doritos. The GP will only be able to do basic obs and most GP surgeries won't take blood on kids anyway.

Covert administration would be possible - it now comes in a suspension and orodispersible tablets, but I don't think it would be ethical.

A&E weren’t helpful last time I took him said I need to wait for outpatient appointment and he very got distressed by the whole thing. He seems ok right now, so I’ll try again with GP tomorrow.
How many calories should I be trying to get into him? He’s always had a small appetite. But he’s definitely worse at the moment.

@NelleBee

A&E weren’t helpful last time I took him said I need to wait for outpatient appointment and he very got distressed by the whole thing. He seems ok right now, so I’ll try again with GP tomorrow. How many calories should I be trying to get into him? He’s always had a small appetite. But he’s definitely worse at the moment.

Presuming he is doing light exercise (i.e. PE once or twice per week) then he needs 1868 calories just to maintain his current weight. To gain 500g per week, he'd need 2368 calories per day.

I understand why you're going via the GP, and it's important to bear in mind your DS's emotional health. But you need to make sure that you know how far away he is from a healthy intake. He's basically 1600 calories short each day.

@NelleBee if he is sedentary min 2000 for a 13 year old boy. If he is remotely active 2200 and v active 2400. That's to maintain and grow/develop
To put weight back on much more.
If he is nearer 14 add 200 at least to each amount above.
Teen boys need a whole heap of calories. I dont mean to alarm you but his current intake will see him.lose weight v fast.

I forgot to add screenshots for why I've given those calorie values.

DD1 is 15, but very similar stats to your DS. I got an average 2500 into her last week and she's gained 1kg. When she was on 1700 average, she lost 0.7kg.

Oh ok, I see. So he needs a lot more calories! I will see if I can get him to have a milkshake for supper. Or tempt him with ice cream. He’s very sedentary he struggles with any physical activity probably because he hasn’t got the energy.

Yes, he is quite literally starving. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but that's why we're jumping up and down about getting him seen. Lots of GPs don't understand much about eating disorders. Especially if the child presents as a 'picky eater'.

If you joined EDS-UK Facebook group, they'd be telling you to take a copy of the MARSIPAN checklist to A&E and to sit there until they do something. I know you have reasons for not doing so, but it's that serious.

Anorexia has the highest mortality of all mental health conditions in under 18s. DD1's Consultant likened it to leukaemia in terms of severity.

The problem us with saying it's her body Scribbly is that she's not really controlling her own mind atm 😕 all her decisions are being made by the ED. It's a really difficult situation, I don't think covertly would work but I would put the tablet in front of her and expect her to take it every day, like lots said I wouldn't take no for an answer.

It's no different to if she was diabetic and was refusing insulin imo, its life saving medication.

I do get how hard it is, my dd also has ASC and is demand avoidant. It's not easy.

But how do you not take no for an answer? If she says no she says no. The psychiatrist said last time she’ll need to be on board as has to take the tablets. We can’t ram them down her throat. We say she has to eat, put the food in front of her and she refuses.

He’s having milk and peanut butter toast now. Am I better trying to get a sooner appointment with his CAMHS doctor rather than the GP?