Donor eggs where to start?

[Hopewishprayer]

I am currently in my 4th ICSI cycle with today receiving a day 3 update which was not great- there is no much hope for day 5, I don’t think I will have anything to transfer 🥹
I can’t keep going through this process and so am keen to explore donor eggs - it is something I have thought about for a while (I am 39)
can anyone offer insight into how long the waitlist is in clinics in the Uk - eg Manchester fertility is one I am interested in
or is it much quicker to go to Spain?
how does cost compare Uk vs abroad generally?
I will need to spend lots of time researching but would be grateful if anyone can share any info x

Sorry you've been having such a complicated journey. It's been a 3 or so years since my last donor egg cycle, so I may be out of date, but LWC had no wait to speak of when using the London Egg Bank. Their advice to me at the time was that success rates with frozen donor eggs were becoming comparable with fresh. And, indeed, I was successful on that cycle. Best of luck!

@Hopewishprayer sorry to hear has not been easy so far. I assume your clinic does not offer to match you with an egg donor?

Some London clinics do.

Going to Spain is an option and you would probably have a lower waiting time from the moment you are matched with a donor until you receive the eggs but in Spain you cannot choose the donor, you will be matched anonymously. At least that’s what I have heard.

In the UK you can select the donor by certain characteristics

Another option is for you to try a clinic that can offer donors from other countries such as Ukraine, Philippines etc.

One more thing to bear in mind is to check if the donor eggs will be shared with another future parent/family. E.g. a donor can donate 10 eggs in one cycle but you will only get 5. The other 5 can be given to someone else.

Hope this is helpful. Good luck!

I looked into this 2 yrs ago. My understanding was that from a UK donor, you have far more choice and knowledge about the donor. Caucasian, Blonde, 5ft 4, blue eyes, uni degree, sporty etc etc and the child will be able to search for them at age 18. You can search online to get an idea of what info you get read.

In Spain though (and likely other countries)- the donor cannot be traced in years to come which might leave a void for the child- never knowing where they came from. I also read that you don't find out much about the donor, and although they are in Spain- their ethnicity might be African, Asian or from somewhere else. Again- this apparently isn't disclosed to you!

I don't know about waiting times or next steps. We had TTC 13yrs, 3 losses and it was only at age 42, after 2 rounds of IVF that donor eggs was ever mentioned as an option and the percentage chances of pregnancy explained! After discussion and reading up, we decided not pursue it further.

Sorry but that's not correct.

We were blessed with an egg donor baby a few years ago. We went with a UK clinic, no waiting list, matched to skin, eye colour, was told level of education, likes etc. It took no time at all and looking back was the easiest cycle we did.

We did check out a few clinics in Spain and with each one of course they tell you what colour and even level of education the donor has!! It would be a bit odd to sign up for a donor egg for a white couple and not know if the donor was African or Asian for goodness sake! Nothing wrong with say white couple using a black donor, or the other way around, but you're certainly told about the ethnciity of the donor!! No different to adoption in that sense, its not pot luck!!

The big difference between Uk and overseas is price and any child made cannot trace the donor in Spain and Czech clinics , in the UK the clinic keeps a record and the child can trace the donor at 18, if they so wish.

The Spanish and Czech clinics are way cheaper than what we paid in the UK, WAY CHEAPER, literally a fraction of the cost, but we decided to keep with the UK as the same clinic was where we had a few failures using our own eggs and sperm, age was the real drawback with us, but we got lucky the first time we switched to donor eggs. We didn't have any 'spare' embryo's after our success and are considering going through it again.

I can honestly say our baby feels 1000% ours and when they reach about 5 or 6, we will start gently discussing the idea of a donor. The counselling we got as part of our treatment gave us a wealth of info that kids that grow up 'always' knowing the truth of where they come from, are the most mentally healthiest. Ours can trace their donor at 18 and we will ensure they grow up 'always knowing' their origins.

I'm having my first donor FET next month. In Spain, you fill in a form with your characteristics like height, weight and so on, and you supply them with pictures. They must, by law, match these things so that the child resembles the parent. So no, I will not be given an Asian or African embryo, because I'm ginger with fair skin. I also went with Spain due to the cost. There are a couple of "low cost" UK clinics, but I was told there were long waits at one that I looked into and the cost of the medications and travel would have meant it actually cost me more than going overseas. I'm with IVF-Spain Alicante and can't fault them, the care is incredible.

Sorry to join in your thread with questions OP, but in a similar position.

Im still getting my head around what it all means, but can someone tell me if a donor egg is much more likely to be successful than my 38 year old eggs?

Im right at the beginning on IVF investigations and confused. Would love to understand more.

@1990s so in terms of eggs, there are really two factors in play: whether you ovulate (or can be chivvied into doing so with medication), and then the 'quality' of your eggs, which is a roundabout way of describing whether or not those eggs are likely to result in a successful pregnancy.

IVF Investigations will largely be looking at the first part, and for some women donor eggs will be necessary as they aren't, for whatever reason, producing eggs.

In terms of egg quality, there's less that investigations can tell you about that and it's often more a 'suck it and see' situation. Over time, a smaller and smaller proportion of every woman's eggs will be chromosomally normal and able to result in a successful pregnancy so eventually you do end up in a position where the possibility of success with your own eggs is very, very low and donor eggs are far more likely to be successful. I think the latest success rate stats are:

• 19% for women aged 38 to 39
• 11% for women aged 40 to 42
• 5% for women aged 43 to 44
• 4% for women aged over 44f

The same figure for women under 35 is 32%, so as you get older, you can see how using donor eggs (which will come from a younger woman) can help significantly lift your chances of successfully having a baby from what would otherwise be very low odds.

Personally, I'd say that at 38 I'd be giving my own eggs a go if it was possible to do so. (And, indeed, I did exactly that.) Cumulative success rates at age 38 would probably be pushing 50% over 3 cycles of treatment, which is a decent shot. In terms of the costs of treatment, donor eggs will add a lot to the cost of treatment, so unless the IVF Investigations reveal a clinically significant reason to go to that option straight away, using your own eggs makes sense, with the option to switch to donor eggs down the line if needed.

Using donor eggs also adds some emotional and social complexities that you don't have to deal with when using your own eggs. I am being very careful here not to say "why would anyone use donor eggs I'd they didn't have to?" because part of my own journey to using them was coming to realise that I'd love the special and unique child born through their use so much that they are in no way a 'second-place' option. But it's quite a complex thing to embark on, with considerations for what it will mean for your child throughout their life, so for what it's worth my advice on paper would be to give your own eggs a go (provided your clinic don't advise otherwise), and meanwhile start doing the work of processing those questions around donor conception so that if you find yourself at a place where it's clinically your best choice, you'll also be more confident in your sense of whether it's right for you. Best of luck!

@Persipan I can’t thank you enough for that thorough reply, that explained it so well, and really helps as I try to process all the information.

@Persipan thank you for the info
@Greenlee the clinic you are using is one that I have come across so good to know you are having a positive experience, good luck with your FET
@ilikehoney which clinic in UK did you use? I have liked at Manchester fertility but the waitlist is 6 months

City Fertility in London. They offer UK donors and we didnt wait, I would say if you’re considering London for your treatment do your research as there are so many clinics down here offering donor egg cycles. We used them simply because it was where we had multiple failed ICSI cycles , own eggs.

I wish you the best of luck, we had a horrendous time with infertility, adoption was our next step if the donor egg route didn’t work, so have your plan and stick to it. A friend of mine stopped after three cycles own eggs and let go of the idea of having children. I think it’s important to have your end point in your mind. And never stop being kind to yourself, you have gone through something few people could even comprehend. Xxx

@ilikehoney thank you, I am in Scotland so if Uk will likely be London , seems most places there don’t have long waiting time.
thank you for your kind words, it’s so true people can my even begin to imagine what we go thorough but good to know I am not alone in this x

Thank you @Greenlee and @ilikehoney re the info you get from Spanish clinics. I've clearly read the wrong information regarding not knowing the ethnicity of the donor. I'm glad to read that you do indeed find out and can choose the ethnicity.

No problem at all @MarmiteCoriander glad to clear it up 🙂Ethnicity is a question they specifically ask and have to match. I'm fairly sure that the "matching team" are really good at their jobs, because I heard from one mum that her DE child looks more like her than her biological ones, who all resemble their father! 😁

No problem , sorry if I bit . I just know it’s important to get correct info for those of us in this .

OP Can I say the website Health Unlocked the fertility network - is a goldmine of support and gave me great support and friends in my darkest days, just in case anyone hasn’t heard of the service . Wealth of advice on donor cycles from every type of options, from those that went thru it.

healthunlocked.com/fertility-network-uk

@ilikehoney that you so much I will check it out 💕

My children via embryo donation in Spain are 16 and I was only given the age and blood group of their donors, so I'm very interested to hear that some clinics give the ethnicity of their donors. It's a shame that Spanish clinics are still very hit and miss in the amount of information they give for our children to know. It has negatively affected my children.

@Carajillo I suspect it's that the law has changed. My clinic has been very insistent that it's the law which requires them to match in this way. I expect it's unlikely for me to get any info on what country my donors are from, probably just told they're caucasian. Have you thought about doing something like 23andme with your children considering their age? I know we are unlikely to find the donors themselves (unless they've purposely put their dna online in an attempt to find your children) but maybe it might be nice to see things like "53% Danish, 37% German" etc which those tests can return. I believe you can submit it on their behalf and manage the accounts, so that only you actually decide whether genetic relations can make contact. They do have the option to be "uncontactable" and only return info on ethnicity.

Many women using donor eggs from Scotland have treatment at the London women's clinic in Darlington, I did, although am North East based, not Scotland.

Initial appointment early May 2021, bought my eggs from the London Egg Bank mid May, started my cycle early June, transfer end of that month, baby born earlier this year. Very fortunate with our first transfer, no waiting, five embryos in the freezer although we will likely donate them as our family is complete.

I would really urge anyone considering using donor eggs to do their research and seriously consider the implications of having treatment in a country that uses completely anonymous donors. The donor conception network is an excellent resource and source of support.

@NotMyDayJob thank you, we have decided to stay in the Uk and have consultation with Darlington LWC in Jan 😊 x

@Greenlee The law hasn't changed in Spain. Legally clinics can give as much non identifying information as they wish, but clinics are reluctant to give information. Some clinics give a little bit more than age and blood group but most do not give nationality or ethnicity.

My children submitted DNA to Ancestry and 23andMe when they were 12. They found out their donors are from Russian/Eastern Europe and probably Spain. Egg donor probably Eastern European as Spanish clinics use migrant workers and students as egg donors. They are grateful for this information but would like more and to potentially make contact with siblings and or donors.

There is very little take up of DNA testing in Spain at the moment so finding relatives is unlikely. Donors do not need to submit DNA to be traced as other close relatives can help you find donors and siblings.

As my daughter says, it is her human right to be able to know about and potentially find her genetic family and having to pay and go to the trouble of DNA testing with very little hope of finding family makes her both angry and sad.

C x

Hi, as to IVF clinics abroad- they have no waiting lists or max 2-week one. You can compare prices of IVF DE abroad- here. Hope this helps.

Can anyone advise for a fresh transfer with DE roughly how far in advance did you begin medication to prepare lining?

@Hopewishprayer for me it was 20 days of estrogen with an ultrasound at about 16 to check the lining looked good. But I also had a decapeptyl shot in the previous "mock" cycle, which stops ovulation for a month, as otherwise the body can interfere with keeping the lining intact for a bit longer than usual.

Hello, DH and I have decided to pursue egg donor conception following 4 failed rounds of IVF/ICSI with 0 eggs at collection on 27th March. Consultant advised this os likely our best bet due to diminished ovarian reserve. We plan to finance via Access Fertility and so will likely opt for London's Women's Clinic Harley Street which is partnered with the London Egg Bank. This has 1 of the benefits of shorter waiting list from my understanding. Wo deri g if anyone else has any experience with this option and this clinic?

Not that particular clinic but I bought eggs via the London Egg Bank and one of the other branches of the London Women's Clinic and had a very good experience. Baby is now 13 months. Best of luck to you