Thinking about ttc with donor sperm as single woman

[tygr]

Hi

This is my first thread on this topic and I will have a proper look around as I know lots of other people have been in this situation but I wanted to have my own thread to help me get my thoughts together.

I turn 40 this month. I'm single. I hoped that I'd find the right relationship to have children within but it hasn't happened.

I've been alternating between denial and panic that I've missed my chance for the last few years. I know it might be too late already. I've never been pregnant. I don't know if I'm fertile. It bothers me a lot.

Now I'm turning 40, i think I might just have to buy the bullet and try to go it alone. I'd be very grateful for any suggestions from those with more experience to help me make the decision and how to go about it.

Hi Ttc2017,

Sorry to hear the the month is dragging. Hopefully you can start soon. How did you find choosing a donor?

They will do the iui when you have 1 or 2 follicles of the correct size to contain an egg. So you will have to have an internal scan to find out. My first attempt I was ready at the first attempt so injected at 9pm and iui was 36 hours later. My second attempt I had too many follicles so they stopped the cycle. My third attempt, I wasn't ready until the 2nd scan. It's a little irritating to have to keep popping into the clinic for 10 mins but they want to make sure they do the iui at right time.

Thankfully I'm not feeling sick yet. Just over 4 weeks along. Apparently morning sickness usually starts about 6 weeks. I was convinced today that something had gone wrong as I wasn't as bloated as the last few days so took another test and still positive so was worrying for no reason x

The first few weeks are really worrying aren't they even though you happy you pregnant you still worry. Do your clinic offer an early scan around six weeks for reassurance? My clinic said if I have to many follicles they can do a reduction in numbers have you heard of this any idea if it safe?

I haven't heard of reducing the number of follicles although it might just be that my clinic don't do it. It's good if that's an option though.

I've got a scan booked on 25th. I believe it's advisable to have one with iui due to increased risk of having an ectopic. I'll be 7 weeks at the scan. I was hoping they would do it a 6 but they prefer to wait till you can see the heart beating,

I'm sure everything will be fine and although it annoying waiting I think it will be amazing to hear the heartbeat to reassure you all is OK. I had a early scan on my previous pregnancy and it made me feel much better once I heard the heart beat

Hello. I've been too lazy to read through the thread so you might know all this already but here are the things I did:

• read through all the lone parent threads on here and the donor conception ones

-got some therapy to talk it through

• joined donor conception network

-asked around my trusted friends and via network skyped with 2 women who have done this (not known to each other!)

• got my amh and progesterone tested

-reviewed sperm banks and decided to go private donor route -bought Instead cups from USA!

• came off pill and learnt lots more about tracking ovulation so bought ovulation predictor kit and sticks and now am taking temperature as well which I wish I had done all along as have been trying too late in cycle!

Good luck!!! X

God so sorry, just seen this post was from Jan. Ignore me and won't ignore the rest of thread or date before I post again

Ttc2017, I'm hoping that you will have some pearls of wisdom for me. I haven't told my parents yet about my pregnancy. I didn't want to get my mums hopes up and having her excitedly asking me constantly about whether I was pregnant or not but I also didn't want to worry them as they have a habit of doing that too much. Have you told anyone that you plan on doing iui with a donor? If you have, how did you approach the subject. I just tried on the phone (we live a few hours apart) but chickened out again. I'm not big on discussing my feelings with them. When I had my counselling session at the clinic I had no problems discussing it so I think that it's just me worrying about their opinion and that they won't accept my choice. I'd be very grateful if you or anyone can give any advice x

I was in similar situation I only told my best friend to start with then sort of just casually mentioned I was just looking into it to my family (I had actually booked it all by then) but wanted to test the waters and see how they would react I have only told close family and keeping it that way for now they had a few concerns but realised in the end it is my decision and my body. I'm sure your family will be really happy for you I think everyone has there opinion and concerns but the main thing is that you and baby are happy and healthy I'm wishing you lots of luck one thing I would say is be clear and strong after I started of very vague about everything it turned out better when I got straight to the point. This is what I'm doing. This is when this is how and that is that. Lol if you don't accept it I understand but I just ask you to be pleased for me if I get good news. And after thinking It over after the initial shock they are positive and accepting of it. Just praying I get my bfp next month. Definitely don't stress yourself out over people's opinions you have a good excuse to not stress now :) and other people should realise that to sorry I'm not a massive help it's always easier telling a stranger isn't it but once the cats out the bag I'm sure you will enjoy talking all things baby with them it will be talks on nappies and what pram to get before you know it! :)

Hi how are you all getting on?
I had IvF treatment in April
The process was no where near as bad as I thought it would be.
Injections were fine and and had no side effects. I had four good sized follicles, when I then had the egg collection three of them had got too big so only two were ok
They got two eggs, one fertilised and divided nicely
The transfer was then done on day three
Sadly it did not end up being a positive result 😢😢 am now deciding what to do next
I have a review appointment on Friday
Love to hear how you are getting on xx

@Nessie2018 Sorry to hear that it didn't go as hoped for you.

I've just got home from my 20 week scan. Baby wasn't playing ball though and I've got to go back for another scan in the next two weeks. I got a good pic of it sucking its thumb though.

I'll keep my fingers crossed that you get positive news soon x

Hi ah thank you very much
Ah that's cute
Congratulations 😊😊 hope all goes well from here
X

Hi everyone, this may be a possibility for me to. Can anyone reccommend a seminar or clinic in London that can explain and is small and friendly. I have special. Needs and don't want to deal with judgy people who won't be supportive or try to understand my needs.

Hi all hope you are all doing ok?
Any updates?

Just thought I'd update you on my journey and maybe ask for some opinions...

I had my review appointment two weeks ago and they retested my amh level. It was 4.8 last June, this test has come back as 1.8 such a big drop!!! Anyone else experienced this??
The ivf attempt I just tried was only 8/9 weeks ago so it must have been 1.8 when I did it. I ended up with five follicles, two eggs collected, one top quality embryo transferred on day 3. So went wrong at implantation stage
I have another appointment to discuss it on Friday
Feeling mixed up!!!!!!
I was planning on trying again if amh had stayed the same but it prob want the same anyway as I've just said?!
This is sooo hard 😢
Really don't know what to do at the moment
I am doing this alone too so money is obviously a factor
I've just applied for a 0% credit card which could fund another go but it would be a final go
Anyone else had really low amh and been successful?
I am 42 in July btw
I have a friend whose amh was 2.1 when she was 34 she went for ivf and now has a two year old girl

Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated
Thank you xx

Is anyone interested in chatting about going it alone and using DEDS?