Ex wants me to pay half the holiday club fees but won’t take any annual leave

[AveryIX]

My ex thinks I should pay half the holiday club for half term even though he wont take any time off to have DS. He’s got annual leave left but says he’s saving it for next year. DS is 6 and in year 2 so obviously I cant just leave him at home while im at work.

We split up about 2 years ago and he has him Wednesday nights and alternate weekends. Its generally ok although I do most of the organising around school and clubs etc. I work in a supermarket bakery and my shifts change every few weeks so I have to get my rota sorted quite far in advance. I cant just decide not to work because its half term.

The holiday club is £32 a day and I’ve booked him in for 4 days so far as thats when I’m definitely working. I can cover some of the other days with annual leave but not all of them. My mum helps when she can but she still works herself and I cant expect her to take time off for me.

I asked ex if he could take a couple of days off as he has plenty of notice and he said no because he wants to save his leave for a holiday next year. I said fine but then surely he can pay towards the club if I’m having to pay for it because neither of us is available. He says we should split it 50/50 and that childcare is my responsibility to sort out on my days. I said yes but these are school holidays and he is working on the days he would normally have DS anyway so I’m not really sure how that makes it my responsibility.

He says he pays maintenance and that should cover his contribution towards DS. I do understand that he pays maintenance and I’m not asking him to pay for everything, but I dont think its unreasonable to expect him to help with holiday childcare when he could take some leave. He took 3 days off last month to go away with his girlfriend so its not like he has none left. He said thats completely different and he shouldn’t have to use his holiday allowance to cover my childcare.

I dont want to fall out over it because we do usually get on ok and DS loves seeing his dad. But I also cant afford to pay for everything just because I happen to be the one who sorts it out. AIBU to think he should either take some leave to have him or contribute to the holiday club? Or am I being unreasonable expecting him to use his annual leave for childcare?

I don’t agree that he should only pay his days- as he only has Wednesday night that leaves op pretty much with picking up all other costs and maintenance won’t touch the sides

well exactly. I’m shocked at everyone saying that in top of having to do most of the childcare, OP should also have to pay for most of the holiday childcare as some kind of perverse punishment for being the parent who has stepped up to care for their child most of the time.

He should assume he is having his son on a Wednesday in holidays and sort childcare if he is unwilling to take 1 day leave, as he’d rather go away with his gf instead. Why you should have to pay half I don’t know. Why is it your responsibility to pay childcare for every day including half of his? Maintenance doesn’t really cover the fact dad is unwilling to take one day AL. Basically he just expects you to cover cost and pick up the slack if he’s sick etc, which is unreasonable and i’d be telling him.

Why is his maintenance payment so low when he only has his dc Wednesday nights and eow.
Does UC pay 80% of your childcare costs. If so and he gives you 50% for the Wednesday , you're still gaining. He doesn't 'have' to pay any child care costs, so taking half is probably your best bet.
He does sound useless though, only having his dc 8 nights a month.