my former father-in-law, lets call him Paul, who is claiming that I owe money from various "family loans" dating back to 2017–2022.
Background
- I separated from my ex-wife late 2025.
- Following the separation, Paul contacted me regarding a Barclaycard balance transfer and, for the first time, raised several older alleged loans.
- Prior to this, the only debts specifically discussed with me during the separation were the Barclaycard balance and an Argos account.
Barclaycard
- A balance transfer was made in March 2025 to consolidate spending/ remaining amount previously made on Pauls credit cards for household expenses.
- My understanding is that I paid my 50% share.
- Some of my contributions were paid directly to Paul, while others were paid to my ex-wife before payments changed to going directly to him.
- I have evidence of at least one £100 payment made to my ex-wife in March 2025, which she used to cover a temporary sick pay shortfall rather than passing on to her dad.
- Paul's records do not appear to reflect all of my contributions because they only show payments he received directly.
Older Alleged Loans
Paul has listed the following as outstanding:
- Summer 2019 holiday – £61 outstanding.
- November 2019 home upgrade – £302.50.
- February 2020 M&S shortfall – £38.13 outstanding.
- February 2021 car loan – £395.
- May 2022 Hopton holiday – £150.
These alleged loans total
£946.63.
I do not have records relating to these alleged loans because they date back several years. During the marriage, many financial matters were handled mostly through my ex-wife, and I made payments to her towards our joint financial commitments. I cannot now verify how those funds were subsequently allocated.
Paul has not provided loan agreements, repayment schedules or documentary evidence beyond his own records and recollection.
Wedding Gift and Family Support
Paul also refers to:
- a £500 wedding gift given in April 2017; and
- over £700 provided before the wedding.
He acknowledges these were gifts but now says he believes they were given under false pretences because he later discovered I had financial difficulties.
My understanding has always been that these were gifts and family support, not loans and were not used in anyway to support my own struggles
Current Position
My position is:
- I do not believe I have any outstanding liability.
- I believe I paid my share of the Barclaycard balance.
- I do not consider the wedding gift or other family support to be repayable.
- I have requested evidence supporting the remaining alleged loans, but none has been produced beyond Paul's own records and recollection.
- Paul has indicated he may pursue legal action if I do not make further payments.
thoughts on the following;
- the strength of any potential civil claim for the alleged loans;
- the significance of there being no written loan agreements;
- how payments made through my ex-wife may affect matters;
- the best way to respond if legal proceedings are commenced.
- he brings up alot of disappointment and hurt but this is not factual