Is it unusual for the mother to move out of the family home?

[BloodyHellKenn]

Just wondering what everyone’s options are. Is it very unusual for the Mother to be the one to leave the family home and the Dad stays? (Shared custody) From what I read on here and generally it is usually the Father that is the one to move out.

In need of some advice!!

little backstory:

Was with the kids dad for 7 years. Kids age are 3 and 1.

We split in December 25 and have been living together ever since but he’s mentally draining me. Constantly making nasty little comments about when I go out and see my friends especially males! He doesn’t want to become a weekend parent so Ive been thinking about becoming the weekend parent. He’s a brilliant dad just not a very good partner. I always have been the stay at home mum until recently before we split I had to go to work as he didn’t want to change his job and didn’t see the pit we was in. I was doing part time but have recently taken on full time, I absolutely love work! Right now it’s the only thing that getting me up in the morning. I have something called emotional unstable personality disorder. Which I’m having a lot of bad days where I can’t deal with the kids and I know I’d struggle and crumble like hell.

So I’m stuck on whether I should move out and leave the kids with him, see them every other week and weekend? Or, Do I quit work and become the stay at home mum again and kick him out for good?

Any advice would be appreciated!!

Probably best to start your own thread.
If you and your ex are somewhat accommodating the sky’s the limit on options. I have a close family member who is “nesting” the kids stay in the family home, adults take turns (one week each).
But mental health and financial health are important.

My ex bought me out of the house when we split up because he earns more than double what I do and he could afford to keep the house and I couldn’t. It was fine by me as we bought that big house as a “fresh start” a couple of years before we split when we were having marital problems. Word to the wise folks: a big shiny house doesn’t fix anything, only adds to the woman’s cleaning load!

I’m moving out soon. My STBEH is buying me out. The family home is v rural and beside all his family. I’m happy to move but plan to move beside public transport and a nice town so my children can have some independence. I worry they will blame me too. But let’s see…

@BloodyHellKennhow are things now with the teen?
I've moved out for the same reasons. My teen is lovely and is coping best the can, but only stays over once a week. I think he just likes the familiarity of home.
I'm so sad inside, even though I try not to pressure him and just try to suggest nice things we can do together.

I'm totally alone now, but I'm coping ok

Hello @AlanisMorningShed Sorry to hear you’ve had a difficult time. Mine is the same and likes the familiarity of the family home. He doesn’t stay over but I do see him in the day and we do activities together. I am sad that he doesn’t stay over and I do miss seeing him go off to school in the morning and watching a film with him in the evening etc. I really miss seeing all his things in his room and everything that’s he’s collected from when he was young. It’s very hard but I just let him know I’m here whenever he fancies coming over and I ring him for a chat most evenings, I’ve sent you a PM. X