Looking for some advice. I went to the police early last year after separating from my ex of 12 years. The relationship was severely abusive, involving coercive control, financial abuse, sexual abuse, physical abuse, strangulation, verbal and emotional abuse. He was arrested for numerous DV related offences & the police investigation is still ongoing. He was initially bailed, and now has been released under investigation but still told not to contact me, come near me etc whilst the investigation is still progressing.
I am 36, we share 3 children together ages 9, 7 and 3. The children unfortunately were subjected to a lot of the abuse and witnessed loads :( ! Slowly with the help of a school councillor, they have made huge progress, are so much happier - almost relieved and behaviour / emotions have improved hugely - which has been noticeable to family and friends. I was advised by social services and DV charities to stop contact as he was not bothering, and just wait to see if he took me to family court.
Whilst on bail, he then eventually demanded the bail conditions were varied so he could have contact with the children. This variation was agreed by the court 13 months ago, but the court stated he needed to contact me via a solicitor only. He didn't ever act on this, didn't bother to contact me via a solicitor etc therefore family court didn't happen. He has not paid a single penny for the children since he left, I have covered everything financially.
Over an entire year has passed, he has now been released under investigation, but advised not to contact me and basically still leave me alone whilst the investigation continues. Two weeks ago, he contacted me basically saying he wanted to put in place arrangements to see the children, and for me to advise dates and times that would suit my schedule. The relationship the children had with him was not great prior to us splitting anyway because they never knew whether they were coming or going, what mood he would be in and were walking on eggshells for the next time he was going to kick off. He constantly played mind games with them, they were so nervous, it was awful! He was not home regularly so I was basically their primary carer anyway. I have been advised again by a DV charity / support worker to not respond to the contact especially whilst a police investigation is going on. The effect he has on my children is huge and I have massive safeguarding concerns (I obviously cannot go into in depth detail on those because of the ongoing investigation).
Does anybody have any advice? If he opened a family court case whilst he is under investigation with the police and potentially in a lot of trouble - would he still be able to proceed with family court etc? Any advice would be highly appreciated as all I want to do is protect my little angels right now!
Thank you!